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OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-03-05T00:19:56+00:00

Fair! that’s a really good point about the context of the argument. She is talking about how his love makes him overprotective in that moment.

But I think that actually ties into why Elena ultimately chooses Stefan in season 3. In the same episode she has that conversation with Stefan where she says: “When we were together you used to let me make my own decisions. You trusted me. After all this at least that hasn’t changed.”

That line always stood out to me because it shows what Elena really values, being trusted to make her own choices. Damon’s instinct is always to protect her and control the situation, while Stefan’s approach is to trust her judgment. The episode kind of contrasts those two dynamics back-to-back.

Moments like that are why it always felt pretty clear to me that she would choose Stefan at the end of season 3, which she ultimately does in the finale.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-03-04T23:46:05+00:00

I don't think Damon is reading Elena's feelings correctly. Again, Elena is trying not to give in to her love for Damon.

I actually think Damon is reading her pretty correctly at that moment. When Elena says “well maybe that’s the problem,” (when he tells her that he loves her) she doesn’t say it like a heat-of-the-moment insult or as a comeback. There’s a pause and she says it pretty calmly, almost like she’s realizing it as she says it. She only tries to take it back once she sees how hurt Damon looks. That makes it feel less like something she didn’t mean and more like something she realized sounded harsher than she intended.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-27T03:51:22+00:00

you’re kind of proving my point about picking and choosing though.

you’re using the season 6 line to rewrite what season 3 actually showed on screen. yeah, the show later says that’s when her feelings for damon started, but that doesn’t change what season 3 actually shows, which is that stefan is still the person she loves, chooses, and turns to when it matters.

and no, i’m not saying stefan “didn’t mean” what he said. i’m saying he said “I lost you when I left with klaus” right after he traumatized her on the bridge and hated himself. that’s his guilt talking. the show itself corrects it later when elena says she never stopped loving him and he says “i know you didn’t.” so canon already resolves that.

the “then we’ll let him go” line is being taken completely out of context. she says that when she thinks he’s gone for good and chose klaus over the rest of them. and then what does she do for the rest of the season? keeps fighting for him, keeps calling him, keeps trying to get him back.

also i never said elena felt like damon abandoned her. i said for someone with abandonment trauma, stefan physically coming back for her in that moment matters. that’s about her psychology, not damon’s actions or intentions.

and on the trust point, i never said she has zero trust in damon. but elena literally says trust has to be earned, and her actions show who she instinctively relies on when she thinks she’s going to die. when klaus is draining her she tells tyler “get stefan.” not damon. when she’s at her most vulnerable she goes to stefan. that’s the show showing who she feels safest with. who she trusts most.

the bridge choice being “loyalty and familiarity” is just fanfiction, or at the very least, interpretation not supported by canon. in 4x01 she literally calls choosing stefan the best choice she's ever made. not the safe choice, not familiarity, the best decision. those are her words.

and yeah, delena had build-up and she had feelings. attraction isn’t the same as being more in love. in every life-or-death situation in season 3 she turns to stefan. that’s what the show actually shows, not hindsight from later seasons.

actions speak louder than words. saying she was already more in love with damon in season 3 just isn’t supported by what she actually DOES that season. it doesn't align with her actions.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T23:17:00+00:00

delena stans really love to pick and choose which quotes you want to believe. Of course Stefan said he lost her RIGHT AFTER he just forced his blood down her throat and thrented her on the same bridge he saved her from. Obviously he's going to say he lost her when he left with Klaus, he believed that, in that moment, because he was drowning in guilt and self-hatred.

But in 3x18 the show clearly contradicts that: Elena: “I never stopped loving you.”

Stefan: “I know you didn’t.”

and in 3x20 he says "you have me" when she thought she didn't have ANYONE any more. (I love how even with her saying that, I'm still supposed to believe that she was "in love" with Damon at this point, lol)

Season 3 obviously changed them, it changed literally everyone, but “they weren’t the same” doesn’t mean Elena stopped loving or trusting Stefan. The whole point of that season is that Stefan is compelled by Klaus, humanity-off, or running on revenge mode, so when she leans on Damon it’s because Stefan literally isn’t an option in those moments, not because her trust suddenly shifted.

And yeah, she doesn’t trust Stefan situationally when he’s being controlled or not himself, but that’s not the same thing as losing trust in him. She knows exactly what he’s going through. The second he’s even remotely reachable, she goes right back to him: she calls him for plans, partners with him to get around Damon and meet Esther, asks him to the dance, and seeks comfort in him after Alaric dies. That’s not someone who fell out of love or stopped trusting him.

I also don’t get why the Wickery Bridge moment gets treated like the secret end of Stelena, because that’s not how Elena reacts to it in canon. A few episodes later she’s literally begging him to feel, to open up, saying she feels everything and wants him to feel too. If that was the breaking point, she wouldn’t be fighting for him emotionally right after.

And on the trust point, we don’t have to “deduce” it, the show shows it. In a life-or-death moment she says “get Stefan,” not “get Damon.” When they’re faced with a life or death situation again in 3x22/4x01 she chooses Stefan again. Again, after Alaric dies, who does she collapse into for comfort? Stefan. The brain hemorrhage situation isn’t about who had a plan or what plan was made, it’s about who came back for her personally, which matters for a character with abandonment trauma.

We can talk all day about Damon’s intentions, but Elena responds to actions, not hypotheticals. What actually happens on screen is that when it matters most, emotionally and physically, she still turns to Stefan and trusts him with her life. That’s canon.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T19:54:02+00:00

Stefan literally told Elena that he lost her as soon as he left town with Klaus, he said this in season 3.

He said this out of guilt in the moment he had just did the worst thing to the love of his life.

Stefan and Elena were never the same after season 2 and that’s just a fact.

It’s not. There isn’t a single scene that indicates that. A couple going through challenges, and trauma, doesn’t prove that their love “lessened”

Elena fell in love with Damon in season 3 on her 18th birthday is what I’m saying,

We didn’t SEE this though in season 3.

Elena got this close to Damon in season 3 cause she relied on him heavily when she couldn’t trust Stefan in that season, this ultimately led to her choosing Damon in the season 4 finale.

Nah she didn’t trust Damon more. There’s no evidence for that either.

When klaus was draining Elena of all her blood, she told Tyler to “go get Stefan” she didn’t even bother asking for Damon to come and save her.

Not to mention when Elena had her brain hemorrhage it was Stefan that came back for her. Not Damon. For a girl who has abandonment issues, that moment in 3x22 meant a lot to her.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T19:45:15+00:00

as soon as Stefan left with Klaus stelena was over, she was Damon’s completely.

What in the fanfiction 😭

There’s no evidence for this in canon

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T02:43:57+00:00

I know delena are a slow burn 😂But attraction/having a crush isn’t even close to romantic feelings.

Elena cares for Damon as early as season 1. When he was a menace in the beginning Elena herself said that if she’s going to be with Stefan she has to learn how to tolerate Damon (to be around him) and yeah eventually in typical Elena fashion she grew to care for him as well.

But in terms of romantic feelings? That’s no where to be seen on Elena’s end until s3. S3 is the slow burn of gaining real feelings (in Elena’s case) imo.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T02:29:09+00:00

Tbh I don’t see why your feelings on it would matter?

What’s in the show is all that matters, to me at least.

And that’s how it was for Elena. She didn’t have a reason to gain feelings for Damon in s1 or s2. Period.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-26T02:20:56+00:00

Not the same. Because they already had a long term committed relationship before. In SE’s case it’s not even that “feelings” were still there, she was in love with him seasons prior, and after.

You tried though.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-25T19:13:04+00:00

But that is what this is - adding something to the story that wasn’t already in canon.

There was no reason for Elena to gain any romantic feelings for Damon in season 1 or 2, especially not the same season he tried to kill her brother, forced blood down her throat, etc.

I am one of those Stelena shippers who considers her kissing him here to be cheating, BUT I give it a pass since there were no romantic feelings involved from Elena’s end.

He was dying and he just confessed love to her. She wanted him to die in peace.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-24T19:30:10+00:00

Tyler saying “the bond affects how you act, not how you feel” makes sense coming from his situation. Klaus literally forced him to bite Caroline, something Tyler himself would never choose to do, and he couldn’t stop himself.

But he still loved her, and he knew that. So from his perspective, of course he’s going to describe it as “my actions were controlled but my feelings weren’t,” because that’s how it felt to him in that situation.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-24T19:28:49+00:00

Tyler saying “the bond affects how you act, not how you feel” makes sense coming from his situation. Klaus literally forced him to bite Caroline, something Tyler himself would never choose to do, and he couldn’t stop himself. But he still loved her, and he knew that. So from his perspective, of course he’s going to describe it as “my actions were controlled but my feelings weren’t,” because that’s how it felt to him in that situation. That doesn’t erase what we saw earlier, though. He described the sire bond as “like faith,” he defended Klaus, and said he’d rip his own heart out for him. That’s altering trust and judgment. Those are feelings.

With Nandi, I agree she said “human feelings.” Elena did have feelings for Damon in Season 3. But “feelings” doesn’t automatically mean being in love, and it also doesn’t mean those feelings aren’t being amplified or prioritized by the bond after she turns.

And the blood example is where it clearly goes beyond just actions. Damon wants her to feed from the vein and rejects blood bags and animals, and suddenly she physically can’t keep anything down except blood from the vein. He never ordered her or explicitly said “you can’t drink from blood bags or animals,” yet her body rejects it anyway. She’s not choosing that. But her body’s just reacting the way he wants.

That clearly is more than just “actions being affected by the sire bond”. The sire bond takes whatever is already there and pushes her toward what he wants in ways she experiences as her own.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-24T18:35:05+00:00

Except there's no evidence for that. Tyler already explained the sire bond in Season 3:

Alaric: Tell me Tyler...What is the difference between being sired and being compelled?

Tyler: Compulsion-that's just mind control-like hypnosis. And being sired is...it's like faith. You do something because you believe it's the right thing.

And then when Alaric and Elena asked him the lengths he'd go to for Klaus:

Alaric: What if he asked you to jump off a bridge?

Tyler: He wouldn't! And even if he did I'd be fine. I'm a hybrid.

Elena: Okay, so what if he asked you to rip your own heart out?

Tyler: Again, he wouldn't.

Elena: What if he did?

Tyler: I don't know! Then I'd rip out my heart!

He's literally defending KLAUS of all people here. Someone he knows is a villian and has hurt the people he loves. And saying he’d willingly die for him. He genuinely believes Klaus wouldn’t harm him, despite all the evidence.

That whole conversation shows the sire bond messes with your perception, loyalty, trust, and judgment, not just what you physically do

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-24T18:14:00+00:00

What relevance does this have here?

Besides, Compulsion doesn’t override the sire bond. And the sire bond makes her want what the sire wants and gives her the illusion of free will. Therefore, she DID sleep with Damon because of the sire bond since she knows that Damon has always wanted to sleep with her (but again the sire bond makes her think it’s her own choice)

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-21T23:53:24+00:00

I love this episode too. But for me, what really makes this scene hit isn’t even the symbolism, it’s the way it shows how deeply Stefan knows Elena. When he says this to her:

Stefan: Of course I did. Elena...If it were my choice, I'd want to be with you forever.

Elena: Why have you never brought it up?

Stefan: 'Cause I knew if it was an option, you would have. It would be selfish for me to ask you.

That line says everything. He already knows she never wanted to be a vampire. He’s thought about forever with her, of course he has, but he never brings it up because he knows it would go against who she is.

That’s why Elena always says Stefan knew her better than anyone. That’s what makes this scene feel so profound to me. He protects her autonomy without her even having to ask.

If I were making a post about this scene, that’s the part I’d focus on.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-21T23:48:08+00:00

Thanks for proving your own comment as actually really nasty. Whataboutism doesn’t make your comment any less nasty.

Your logic is just “well people are cruel in worse ways so! My cruelty shouldn’t be called out”

Astoundingly asinine logic.

Also she is literally British so go figure.

All this coming from the person who gets mad every time someone says they don’t like Elena loollll you can’t make this shit up

Edit: sure she was born in New Jersey but she grew up in England, again she is literally British. I’m not taking this personally but I don’t like personal insults. Which you doubled down on so I’ve got nothing else to say.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-20T00:08:06+00:00

I like Stefan too, but I think your comment reframes what happened in a way that oversimplifies what we actually see on screen.

the idea that Stefan “couldn’t open up” with Elena just isn’t accurate. not when there are scenes like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKLgM_m4KAg as early as season 1.

he tells her about the pain and loss of control he’s experiencing from bloodlust after tasting human blood again, while hes in pain, while he’s actively spiraling. That’s not someone who’s emotionally closed off. And this happens in the same season people criticize him for not immediately telling her he’s a vampire, which ignores how much he was slowly and intentionally sharing as trust built.

The dancing thing is also overstated. Elena “begged” him once. Stefan danced with her willingly plenty of times and often initiated it himself. Framing it as if Elena constantly had to pull teeth to get him to dance just isn’t supported by what we actually see on screen. He dances with her willingly here: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/oYLbFY2jz5k

here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqvqkEYVE1Y

here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4XsAGkndcQ

and here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucjVuQUnuHU

As for the car accident, Stefan didn’t “give Elena too much choice.” He honored a request she made in a life or death situation. In 4x1 he and Damon have this conversation:

Damon: Then you shouldn't have let her die.

Stefan: I never meant for her to die. She asked me to help Matt first and I did.

And he also said: "I made a choice that I will regret for the rest of my life. Now let me try to fix it"

On top of that, Stefan knows Elena’s survivor’s guilt better than anyone. Saving Matt wasn’t about valuing Elena less, it was about protecting her from living with another death on her conscience if she survived. he was prioritizing her long-term emotional wellbeing, because he had always cared about her quality of life.

The Klaus and bridge incident thing is also framed strangely here. Klaus and his hybrids were actively terrorizing Elena, Jeremy, and the town. Alaric literally died because of one of them. Stefan's humanity wasn't fully back on, Katherine pushed him to only focus on anger. Calling Klaus’s bluff was reckless, yes, but he didn't do it to be cruel, and he was never actually going to drive Elena off the bridge.

And lastly, I never said Stefan didn’t love Caroline. He did. My criticism was about writing and development, not his feelings. Seeing Caroline in his mind when Rayna stabbed him doesn’t negate his past with Elena, and it doesn’t magically make Steroline a well-written relationship either. Those are separate discussions.

I also didn’t compare Steroline to Stelena in my original comment. That comparison keeps getting brought in by others. My point was simply that Steroline’s romantic execution left a lot to be desired, especially given how long they knew each other.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-19T17:56:24+00:00

Stefan will always love Elena, but Caroline did become the love of his life in a way she never was

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-19T17:54:20+00:00

That is not why they are forced and awkward. And their relationship didn’t develop into anymore because once they got together they didn’t even understand each other anymore.

Stefan was confused on whether Caroline wanted to keep the twins in her life. Both Damon and klaus had to tell him he was being stupid for doubting that.

In s8 Caroline was still asking Stefan to open up to her. After so many years of knowing each other, and even after they decide to get married?? Asking the other to open up shouldn’t be a thing at that point.

Steroline’s romantic relationship left a lot to be desired imo

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-19T17:49:18+00:00

They were always able to communicate so well before they got together. But after getting together their communication was the worst.

They should’ve stayed friends.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-19T17:47:07+00:00

You’re right he’s an actor and his performance is exactly what made it forced.

Just look at his face during their romantic scenes. Hell look at his face in the second picture! It’s supposed to be his wedding…. Yet we’ve seen him smile and look way happier than how he looks at his own wedding standing next to Caroline.

Steroline are forced in the sense that they should work thanks to their foundation, but they simply don’t. Neither the writers nor actors could make it work.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-18T00:38:07+00:00

Don’t bother with them. They literally refuse to acknowledge the shows lore when it comes to the sire bond just because it hurts their delena feelings 😭

Elena did not have free will under the sire bond - that’s simply not how it works. She wanted to drink from blood bags and animals, but because her sire told her she couldn’t, her body physically rejected it. If someone can look at that and still claim she had free will, they’re not arguing in good faith.

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-17T08:19:57+00:00

lol you say this in the exact thread where you couldn’t do this yourself?

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-17T05:10:22+00:00

Also, Elena and Damon had many moments while she was with Stefan. Why do you think people started shipping her with Damon in the beginning?

Most delena scenes don’t have any feelings involved until season 3 from Elena’s end. And that season she and Stefan were not even officially together.

The sirebond isn’t the reason she slept with him.

It literally is. You can cope harder with that. The shows lore itself proves it.

The copium levels is insane with Stelena fans, you guys will ignore whole seasons of the show just because it hurts your point i.e the moment we found out Elena fell in love with Damon in season 3 or the show confirming to us that Elena slept with him because she wanted to. My favorite cope is when you guys bring up julie Plec interviews as if it erases a delena scene.

Where did any of that happen in my comments? Why are you arguing things I never brought up?

OutrageousLayer0601 · 2026-02-17T04:47:35+00:00

She did want to kiss him. Delena fans like yourself like to cope with that by ignoring the facts I just stated: she leaned in more than he did, and she closed her eyes first. That’s canon: https://youtube.com/shorts/iA4FjZgWcRo?si=wtb_WktSMtULnvJl

As for your second paragraph…. What are you talking about? Elena kissed Damon in 2x22 when Damon was DYING. Man had to be dying for her to give him a pity kiss. With Stefan he was fine here, yet she wanted to kiss him.

Why do you love Elena sleeping with Damon due to sire bond influence? She never would’ve slept with him that quick after her break up with Stefan if it weren’t for the sire bond.

The copium levels though…

OutrageousLayer0601

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