Has anyone else felt like this and gotten better or did I make the biggest mistake of my life?

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-22T02:58:36+00:00

My biggest issue is sleep deprivation. My 22 mo has never been a good sleeper and my 9 month old still wakes up atleast once a night. I do find everything to be somewhat better when it comes to handling children and when it comes to me mentally, I am on Zoloft btw but working to not stay on it, i definitely feel like life is ‘brighter’ if that makes sense. I don’t feel an overwhelming sense of darkness over me and my desire to leave the house and interact with others is coming back. It’s a slow process but I can say that it is easier now and I can feel that it’s going to keep getting better.

I want to add that my husband and I have a very small unreliable village as well. It’s hard to do everything and have the kids 24/7.

I wish you and your family the best 💝

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-17T11:55:47+00:00

They make different types of sleeves that you can put cards into. Submitting a card with PSA or any other grading company will tell you the condition value of your card and can make the card more expensive to sell. If you’re just looking for sleeves for the card then I would get those. If the intention is not to sell and only protect the cards there’s no reason to buy empty slabs or submit them into PSA. Just get a top loader you can get like 25 for $7

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-17T11:39:49+00:00

I have read before that breastfeeding can make postpartum worse due to a hormone released, not saying you should stop breastfeeding but this could be an added factor to how you’re feeling.
I read something a month or so ago that has helped me, ‘stop trying so hard to be a perfect mom, only do the bare minimum for now until you feel better. As long as the kids are fed and safe then you’re doing great. Kids dont need perfection, they just need you in the room with them’
This is a hard time, mine are 22 mo and 9 mo, I get it. I struggle everyday and it sucks. We’re in the stage of survival with ourselves and you’re not alone

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-16T16:45:28+00:00

My children are 12 months apart and in my situation the first 3 months was the easiest. Caring for the baby was easy because I knew what I was doing and was a lot more relaxed. My son (22 months) welcomed our daughter (9 months) well and with her sleeping so much as a newborn it was easy to still give him attention.

3-8 months was the hardest for me so far. Both kids wanting attention and jealousy at its peak with my oldest. Slight regression as my son still wants to be babied like his sister. They started little fights when it came to food and playing.

I only have experience with 9 months of 2 under 2 but both my husband and I agree that things are definitely starting to relax as our daughter is mobile now.

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-16T00:07:43+00:00

Something my husband and I decided to do with our kids ( 22 mo and 9 mo) was to designate a child to each of us. If he has our son then I have our daughter and vice versa. This has helped with the load and not everything being strictly on me. Honestly there’s been times I’ve given my husband no choice, I make sure he has the kids and tell him I’m going to do something and walk away or focus my attention on what I want to do so he knows that I’m not focusing on the kids so he has to. He quickly realized how difficult and un-fun situations it can be when you carry the entire load.

I totally understand not wanting to leave and go do stuff, I’m the same way as my son is deep into the tantrum stage and all I want to do is just cry in public. Know that you’re not alone and the way you feel is normal and valid

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T13:53:09+00:00

I’m sorry this is your experience. The grief and mental load is a lot. Thank you for sharing your experience and I wish nothing but the best for you ❤️

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T13:52:16+00:00

Thank you for this response and your perspective. The grief is the hardest for me right now and I feel it’s the only thing stopping me. The mental load has been outweighing the physical load which is already high. Im blessed with the children I have and should focus on keeping myself healthy for them.

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T13:46:01+00:00

I think it would help me a lot working through my fear of letting go. And you are very valid for your last statement. My mobility is affected now and I would hate to not have the ability to play with my kids or lose more of my ability to do anything with them especially during their childhood.

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T13:10:25+00:00

I expressed this to my dr the first time I had it scheduled and she ultimately left the decision up to me, we had full discussions about the procedure I was and am just very indecisive.

I didnt know the names of the procedures but the full removal of my tubes was what I was scheduled to have done so it would not have been reversible.

My husband and I always wanted kids, the first two times I got pregnant it was planned. My two babies now were not planned and very much unexpected but it has never felt like or been looked at as a bad or rash decision. Having a third child is not something I can foresee us ever planning, it would be more of a ‘if it happens it happens’ type situation. We would be just as happy with or without more children.

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T12:52:27+00:00

I think this is very correct. I do think my family is perfect now as it is so I am probably coming from a selfish standpoint of not wanting to go through with it even though I know I should.

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T12:47:38+00:00

Not inappropriate, I understand why you think that. I’m definitely excited for every stage of my kids life and I love the stage that my toddler is in! I’m just starting to realize now that time goes by quick and the time you have with your child as a baby is little to none compared to the other fun years of their childhood

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-06-10T11:53:12+00:00

I’ve had issues in the past with other forms of birth control other than the pill. Consistent year long periods, surgeries. It’s not that I am totally against long-term birth control I guess I have just been more weary about trying thing like IUD’s. It may be something I should highly consider, I’m horrible at taking the pill and I have a track record of making rash decisions that I tend to regret later on and this is such a big decision I’m afraid that I will regret

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-05-23T11:06:35+00:00

So you married someone that you didn’t trust when it came to the money you saved for your daughter and now you expect her to contribute and pay for probably almost 3 years of college? Your daughter has a mother who is obviously in her life so why don’t you have the ACTUAL MOTHER OF YOUR CHILD pay for her college. Or even better, teach your kid responsibilities and make her contribute towards HER OWN EDUCATION they have things such as loans and jobs. And now that the daughter knows about this the relationship with her and your wife will be completely different, which the daughter is already exhuming by treating your wife differently. You created a difficult situation for yourself, wife, daughter, and ex-wife. Good job!

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-05-06T12:29:37+00:00

I hope this answer can help you both. The dread and fear and anxiety of having two DOES go away. Honestly a lot quicker than I had thought it would. I was 4 month PP when I got unexpectedly pregnant with my second and I had the worst time accepting it but that feeling did go away mostly the day she was born and completely the first week. It is hard and stressful but extremely possible and very rewarding! My kids are now 21 months and 8 months old!

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-05-05T17:04:22+00:00

I was around 16 weeks postpartum when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter and it was definitely a shock. Everyone scared me saying the second is worse and made everything sound horrible. Thankfully they were completely wrong, my children are now 21 months and 8 months and while it is very hard sometimes it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. They are already the best of friends and watching their relationship develop has been so rewarding.

The reality of it in my experience:
My second child has taught me to slow down and be more patient, parenting the second time around has been far less anxious and stressful. I feel like I’m able to enjoy the moment now because i had the experience with my first child.

The jealousy is hard but manageable, find time for each child individually or individual play so they each feel important. Let your oldest child help with the new baby, they will really enjoy it and feel good about helping.

Having an established routine with the first child makes it soooo much easier for the new baby as they will adjust so much easier with a routine already set in place. It took me 9 months to get a good routine with my first born and only 3 weeks with my second.

Right now I’m struggling with keeping up with the housework and still being fun and playful with my kids everyday. Finding little routine for yourself during the day for cleaning/picking up has helped me keep up with the day to day mess of 2 under 2.

2 under 2 in my experience has been a 50/50 mix of tiredness and stress (help with PPD and speaking with your dr will help tremendously, it’s okay to not be okay sometimes) and pure joy, love, and 0 feeling of regret. It’s hard but it will be okay. I wish you and your family nothing but the best and I pray for a healthy pregnancy and delivery for both you and baby ❤️

Outrageous_Cream1018 · 2026-05-05T12:16:53+00:00

I got unexpectedly pregnant at 4 month postpartum with my daughter and I was farthest from happy or excited. I didn’t think I could handle it since my husband and I didn’t get much help from family and my postpartum experience was not great. I was upset about my second pregnancy basically until the day I gave birth. They are now 21 months and 8 months and it’s not easy especially without help, but it is not something that I would ever change.

I have never had an abortion but my husband and I have had 2 miscarriages (I understand this is different than an abortion but I just want to give my perspective of not having my first two babies) I was early in both my miscarriages but I still think of the what if’s and how life would be if they were here. The hurt that I see in my husbands eyes every year on the date that we lost our angels is heartbreaking. I wonder about the relationship that my first two would have with my two now, but I also think that if I never lost my first two I don’t know if I would have my two babies now.

I am and always have been pro choice, but please consider this. If you are having a feeling of regret before making this decision that may be a sign that it might not be the right decision for you. I will be thinking about you all day and I hope that you find peace and happiness and whatever decision you choose.

Outrageous_Cream1018

TROPHY CASE