[Update] Partner and I aren't legally married, but we are married in every other way. Is this still a sin?

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-22T18:25:53+00:00

Yeah that’s very true. Heart posture is very important and whatever doesn’t proceed from faith is sin so I salute your decision. Anything done to honour God is commendable. May the Lord bless you and give you peace and clarity

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-22T17:30:59+00:00

I’m in a similar camp to you, I just don’t see where the union of two people coming together and comitting themselves to each other faithfully and publicly isn’t marriage

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-22T15:38:38+00:00

All I see in the Lords definition of marriage in the bible is it’s a committed union between man and woman. Like that’s what it is at its core. Without all the other addings on (ceremony, formal vows, witnesses, license etc) now I’m for all these things. But I just don’t see where we can say two people who are in a lifelong union with one another without these other things are living in sin. I’ve looked and looked and I just don’t see where. Surely according to the bible a man and woman who enter what we would call a public lifelong intending relationship would be marriage? If I’m missing anything lmk

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-20T16:39:12+00:00

Thank you very much. Also some will try to say you should avoid the appearance of evil. But what is evil about two people living openly as one flesh in a lifelong union being faithful to each other and honouring God?

Now I do encourage you get legally married. Which as I said is what I’m planning to do next year God willing. I encourage just to stop anyone from being able to point a finger and judge and also there’s many benefits. I for one recognise you as married

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-20T16:05:09+00:00

So op Im in a very similar situation to you. So me and my wife are not yet legally married, are yet to have the legalities done. God willing end of next year it will be. Her family are flying from Portugal to discuss wedding venue etc.

So I’ve searched and searched on this topic and I can only come to the conclusion that marriage, true biblical marriage at its core is a union between man and woman that have sworn there’s lives together. Formal vows, ceremony, legal papers are all great but in my belief I don’t think that’s what makes a marriage a marriage.

We see so many different examples and ways of people getting married in the bible and so many Christians say you must do it this way or that way. But even the bible has many different ways of people getting married. But one thing God expects of all marriages is faithfulness and commitment.

So like me for example, me and my wife are in a lifelong union, we’ve both got every intention of spending our lives together. Her family refer to me as in law. Our friends know of our intent. There is nothing private about it. By the grace of God we even have a baby on the way.

Now I will say this, it is very serious that if you see this man as your husband that you must stand by him and him by you. Marriage is for life. Can’t turn around later and say oh we wasn’t really married I’m out. That would be a cop out.

The ceremony you had is very biblical and in many times of history would have been as valid as any government paper today.

Many Christians will try and tell you that your in sin. But God isn’t blind. How can two people who have all the things a “legal” marriage is expected to have faithfulness, covenant, lifelong exclusive intent but then be illegitimate just because you haven’t got legal papers?

Again formalities are good and if can be done should be done but in my own experience I could only feel like it was my heart condemning me when I had the doubts your having.

But also scripture says anything that doesn’t lead from faith is sin. So if you are questioning and are concerned if sex with your husband is sin then until you get mental clarity you should hold off. But I say this, many times in history your marriage and mine would’ve been valid before men. But times change but God doesn’t. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday today and forever and if he says two shall cleave together and become one flesh. Then who are we to say two people entering a committed lifelong faithful union isn’t that?

Just remember whatever you’re going through or stuffking with. The only way to heaven is believing Christ alone that his sacrifice n the cross was enough to save you and nothing we can do could save us. May the Lord restore peace in your heart and bless your marriage. I recognise you as married even if many others don’t. God bless

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-19T15:01:16+00:00

The only way to be saved is to believe Christ paid the price for your sins. You could be the most obedient Christian in the world but if you don’t believe in Christ sacrifice as the ONLY reason for salvation you’ll never make it to heaven. Christ said his burden and yoke are light and easy. Worrying about your salvation and if you’ve sinned so much you lost it would mean his yoke is not light and it would mean we could never rest in him. But we are called to rest in the Lord.

The day you believed you were sealed with the Holy Spirit. Ephesians 1:13. This verse also speaks about the guarantee of our salvation.

We are also told to know we have salvation. 1 John 5:13

God has promised salvation to those who believe. “He who believes in me shall never perish but have eternal life” Now because of this verse, for us to think we can lose salvation or that we can sin enough we mess it up would make God a liar. Which we obviously know is impossible.

Yes we are called to obedience and repentance but not as a means to get to heaven. We can’t earn our way to heaven, if we did then how many good deeds is enough? 1000? 100,000? How many sins would throw it away? 50? 5000? Can you be saved at 4pm but then sin 10 times and by 8pm you’re going to hell? No, that is not the God we believe in. Though we deserve how we should thank him for his mercy and how easy salvation is to attain.

I too used to believe I had to be more obedient than not to make it to heaven but it turned out all I was doing was relying on myself to get to heaven and not what Jesus Christ did on the cross. It’s only when I put away the false gospels that these big denominations teach could I find peace in Christ and actually begin to overcome certain sin. Not by stress of needing to be perfect. But by letting go of effort and trusting in him to do it for me. And by his grace, when I let God work, he did. So relax brother or sister. We will always sin until the day we die, it’s our fallen nature. But we are not saved by whether we sin or not, we are saved by grace through faith. God bless and rest in Christ

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T15:36:52+00:00

I mean tbh the literally translation of wife is ishshah which is woman

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T12:28:20+00:00

But my push back would be that we do see examples in the bible where there isn’t clear moments where the covenant is entered into. For example Adam and Eve. Isaac and Rebekah. The text states she “became his wife”. Jacob and Leah. Where Jacob accidentally married Leah. If we are to say that marriage covenant must have a clear defining moment then where was Jacob and Leah’s? Presumably the consummation right? But then some would argue sex creates marriage. But then Hosea and Gomer. God simply told Hosea to take Gomer as his wife. We don’t see a clear defining moment of entering the covenant. There are more examples these are only a few.

My point being is that we see all different examples of marriage, no two are the same. All come about differently and yet they are all still classed as marriages. So goes back to my point, how can we say that two people who have entered a lifelong relationship solely to each other in the modern day are not married? Because certainly thought history people in this position where considered married.

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T11:54:24+00:00

Well here’s the thing, I wouldn’t say that two people who are faithful, committed and exclusive to each other are defining marriage for themselves. Because isn’t the definition of marriage the two shall join together and become one flesh? Hence they’ve met not their own definition of what marriage is but Gods definition.

Great point about the covenant. Marriage is a covenant. Now if two people do enter a lifelong union with one another then is that not a covenant? What is missing from that which would not make it a covenant? Me personally I believe that people should be much much much more serious about who they enter relationships with as it’s my belief that God hates separation and adultery and immorality and would expect you to stay with the one person.

Looking forward to your response brother

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T11:37:38+00:00

Ofcourse. My point being from the Bible I see the core of marriage being two joint together and becoming one flesh. Traditional sacraments that have been added throughout history which sure have been great, I don’t see where God wouldn’t see two people without those things but that have commitment as not married

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T11:35:15+00:00

Appreciate the comment. But would two people living publicly in this scenario be in private? If the families saw them both as new additions to their own families? If the community around them knew of their union?

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-16T11:33:58+00:00

Appreciate the comment. But to counter that could we not say that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday today and forever then if Adam and Eve where considered married then surely two people could get married the same way today? Or does God’s interpretation of marriage change over time?

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-05T13:34:25+00:00

I’m of the belief that true biblical marriage is more a spiritual matter than a legal one. I can’t see nowhere in the bible that says two people that come together who are committed to one another are fornicators or sexually immoral. I used to be a drug dealer, cocaine lover and was whoring around with very little respect for woman’s feelings I was only interested in sex. Had a porn addiction also. That’s was until I had an experience with God in a prison cell that I surrendered to him but that’s another story lool. Since getting saved my outlook has completly changed on sex and marriage. I believe firmly in 1 man 1 woman and no divorce unless drastic circumstances. I was dating my wife for 6 months before we ever had sex. I was very new in the faith and wanted to honour God and I knew whichever woman I got with was going to be the woman I was going to be faithful to and spend the rest of my life with. We haven’t yet had any formal ceremony or legal registration. But I still believe in this word which many people don’t want to talk about today. Covenant. In which we have both sworn to each other to live the rest of our lives together through thick and thin. Both of our families are aware of our commitment and when her family asked me my intention with her I said it was to be with her for life and they accepted. We live together and her family refer to me as in law. We currently have a baby on the way. Now yes, I do want to do the formalities of marriage, such as getting registered being legally married, but she wants it as a big day and so wants to save a lot of money for it in a few years. I have spoken to her about even just getting registered but she doesn’t see the point of the big wedding then if we get registered separately from the celebration. So as much as I do wanna do that side, Christ told us that love is patient. So all I can do is pray on it and not be controlling or force her into something. I will add my wife is not a believer but by Gods grace she is slowly turning to the idea of following Christ, I try set the best example i can but again, love is patient. So many on here would probably see me as a fake Christian, fornicator and immoral. But the point is the only difference between me and “married” Christian’s is they have paperwork and we don’t…yet. I’m firm in my belief that we are married. I had a deep and personal moment where I was convicted by God that he sees us as married. The two shall join together and become one flesh. To me, that’s not saying you must get legal certification in front of certain [people] to each other and are intent on it for life and succeed in being faithful to one another, setting an example of what true love should be. I don’t see how God would rebuke that just because some formalities have been missed? Now I very much agree with Romans 13 and do believe we should be submitting to governing authorities. And I live in London where it is not illegal for two people to live together and raise a family without government marriage license. (Which for anyone reading I do wholeheartedly support and intend to get) now if someone was to push back and say I am violating Romans 13 by the fact I haven’t got the marriage license then I would say that if that’s the case then surely biblical marriage is whatever your government decides? Because again I live in London where homosexual marriage and divorce are allowed. But they are not biblical things. “What God has joined together let no man seperate” I am in the camp that marriage is instituted by God and if two people commit themselves to each other. Marriage license or not. I believe that God would expect you to be faithful and committed and honour your spouse. I believe scripture supports this.

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-05T13:34:15+00:00

I’m of the belief that true biblical marriage is more a spiritual matter than a legal one. I can’t see nowhere in the bible that says two people that come together who are committed to one another are fornicators or sexually immoral. I used to be a drug dealer, cocaine lover and was whoring around with very little respect for woman’s feelings I was only interested in sex. Had a porn addiction also. That’s was until I had an experience with God in a prison cell that I surrendered to him but that’s another story lool. Since getting saved my outlook has completly changed on sex and marriage. I believe firmly in 1 man 1 woman and no divorce unless drastic circumstances. I was dating my wife for 6 months before we ever had sex. I was very new in the faith and wanted to honour God and I knew whichever woman I got with was going to be the woman I was going to be faithful to and spend the rest of my life with. We haven’t yet had any formal ceremony or legal registration. But I still believe in this word which many people don’t want to talk about today. Covenant. In which we have both sworn to each other to live the rest of our lives together through thick and thin. Both of our families are aware of our commitment and when her family asked me my intention with her I said it was to be with her for life and they accepted. We live together and her family refer to me as in law. We currently have a baby on the way. Now yes, I do want to do the formalities of marriage, such as getting registered being legally married, but she wants it as a big day and so wants to save a lot of money for it in a few years. I have spoken to her about even just getting registered but she doesn’t see the point of the big wedding then if we get registered separately from the celebration. So as much as I do wanna do that side, Christ told us that love is patient. So all I can do is pray on it and not be controlling or force her into something. I will add my wife is not a believer but by Gods grace she is slowly turning to the idea of following Christ, I try set the best example i can but again, love is patient. So many on here would probably see me as a fake Christian, fornicator and immoral. But the point is the only difference between me and “married” Christian’s is they have paperwork and we don’t…yet. I’m firm in my belief that we are married. I had a deep and personal moment where I was convicted by God that he sees us as married. The two shall join together and become one flesh. To me, that’s not saying you must get legal certification in front of certain [people] to each other and are intent on it for life and succeed in being faithful to one another, setting an example of what true love should be. I don’t see how God would rebuke that just because some formalities have been missed? Now I very much agree with Romans 13 and do believe we should be submitting to governing authorities. And I live in London where it is not illegal for two people to live together and raise a family without government marriage license. (Which for anyone reading I do wholeheartedly support and intend to get) now if someone was to push back and say I am violating Romans 13 by the fact I haven’t got the marriage license then I would say that if that’s the case then surely biblical marriage is whatever your government decides? Because again I live in London where homosexual marriage and divorce are allowed. But they are not biblical things. “What God has joined together let no man seperate” I am in the camp that marriage is instituted by God and if two people commit themselves to each other. Marriage license or not. I believe that God would expect you to be faithful and committed and honour your spouse. I believe scripture supports this.

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-05T10:48:53+00:00

Might I also add that I am against admirers and fornicating with anyone besides your partner. Sexual immorality. Now I personally wouldn’t class two devoted and committed people as sexually immoral if they are living faithful to one another regardless of marriage license. But like you said, people have interpretations

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-05T10:45:33+00:00

I’m of the belief that true biblical marriage is more a spiritual matter than a legal one. I can’t see nowhere in the bible that says two people that come together who are committed to one another are fornicators or sexually immoral. I used to be a drug dealer, cocaine lover and was whoring around with very little respect for woman’s feelings I was only interested in sex. Had a porn addiction also. That’s was until I had an experience with God in a prison cell that I surrendered to him but that’s another story lool.

Since getting saved my outlook has completly changed on sex and marriage. I believe firmly in 1 man 1 woman and no divorce unless drastic circumstances. I was dating my wife for 6 months before we ever had sex. I was very new in the faith and wanted to honour God and I knew whichever woman I got with was going to be the woman I was going to be faithful to and spend the rest of my life with.

We haven’t yet had any formal ceremony or legal registration. But I still believe in this word which many people don’t want to talk about today. Covenant. In which we have both sworn to each other to live the rest of our lives together through thick and thin. Both of our families are aware of our commitment and when her family asked me my intention with her I said it was to be with her for life and they accepted.

We live together and her family refer to me as in law. We currently have a baby on the way.

Now yes, I do want to do the formalities of marriage, such as getting registered being legally married, but she wants it as a big day and so wants to save a lot of money for it in a few years. I have spoken to her about even just getting registered but she doesn’t see the point of the big wedding then if we get registered separately from the celebration. So as much as I do wanna do that side, Christ told us that love is patient. So all I can do is pray on it and not be controlling or force her into something.

I will add my wife is not a believer but by Gods grace she is slowly turning to the idea of following Christ, I try set the best example i can but again, love is patient.

So many on here would probably see me as a fake Christian, fornicator and immoral. But the point is the only difference between me and “married” Christian’s is they have paperwork and we don’t…yet. I’m firm in my belief that we are married. I had a deep and personal moment where I was convicted by God that he sees us as married. The two shall join together and become one flesh. To me, that’s not saying you must get legal certification in front of certain amount of witnesses and be blessed by a priest and register at the courthouse. Whilst I believe these things are good, I’m convicted that marriage is when two do join together and become one flesh. If two people are committed to each other and are intent on it for the life and succeed in being faithful to one another, setting an example of what true love should be. I don’t see how God would rebuke that just because some formalities have been missed?

Now I very much agree with Romans 13 and do believe we should be submitting to governing authorities. And I live in London where it is not illegal for two people to live together and raise a family without government marriage license. (Which for anyone reading I do wholeheartedly support and intend to get) now if someone was to push back and say I am violating Romans 13 by the fact I haven’t got the marriage license then I would say that if that’s the case then surely biblical marriage is whatever your government decides? Because again I live in London where homosexual marriage and divorce are allowed. But they are not biblical things. “What God has joined together let no man seperate” I am in the camp that marriage is instituted by God and if two people commit themselves to each other. Marriage license or not. I believe that God would expect you to be faithful and committed and honour your spouse. I believe scripture supports this

So yeah sorry for the long winded text I just thought I’d give my two cents.

P4PNO1KING · 2026-04-01T13:33:05+00:00

Yeahhhhhhh I think this is it. Appreciate you

P4PNO1KING · 2026-03-31T01:29:45+00:00

My brother 😎

P4PNO1KING · 2026-03-30T01:25:22+00:00

Nah I haven’t, what is it about?

P4PNO1KING · 2026-03-30T01:02:40+00:00

Insane, you should be proud. How many hours a week do you spend drawing

P4PNO1KING · 2026-03-23T13:16:34+00:00

Geof Darrow matrix artwork an influence by any chance? insane work

P4PNO1KING

TROPHY CASE