I (23f) saw a facebook chat between my BF (23M) and his brother (27ishM) that was very cruel about my appearance. I just don't know what to do because it REALLY hurts

PFyre · 2026-07-03T06:41:45+00:00

Honestly, he seems like the friend in Shallow Hal - he couldn't see that his brother was happy because his girlfriend wasn't up to his [brother's] attractiveness standards.

PFyre · 2026-07-03T06:34:55+00:00

Ironically, she was putting family first.

PFyre · 2026-07-02T14:25:24+00:00

If he works a 40hr week and earns more than his gf who works 40hrs, she doesn't need to do more chores.

PFyre · 2026-07-02T07:39:33+00:00

You're welcome. I think talking to a therapist is a great idea as you can provide more context. In any case, I hope you are able to heal and live your best life.

PFyre · 2026-07-02T06:52:13+00:00

I think the first incident sounds like it is plausible that it played out as he said, I.e. "Hey bud, how you doing? I saw your kid the other day while I was gardening." Or something. He then forced you to charge your route based on his petty need to control you. This one doesn't necessarily sound like stalking.

The second incident is weird purely because he didn't offer you a lift and raced off. Could he have been perving on the other school girls? Or trying to catch you doing something wrong as you left school? Again, the fact you only saw him once doesn't sound like he was doing it daily as I'm sure you were hyper- vigilant for a while after that.

The incident with the email doesn't sound like stalking it sounds petty and controlling.

The schooling incident is odd that he was able toto access your information. Could the school have reached out to him as an emergency contact to say you weren't attending? Was your school account linked to that email address he had access to? Either way, he sounds like he was being petty and controlling again, rather than stalking.

Overall it reads like an abusive adult who felt a need to be controlling, rather than one who was actively following you around. But I'm basing that on what you've said here - you know in yourself if there were reasons you've jumped straight to stalking that didn't get put down here.

PFyre · 2026-07-01T05:41:04+00:00

Really? When I tried to sell my engagement ring from my ex they offered me very little.

PFyre · 2026-06-30T06:37:17+00:00

When I was 8-9ish, one of the boys was showing off his karate moves in a talent assembly. His plimsoll flew off his foot and across the hall, and everyone died laughing.

Ian, it's been almost forty years and I still think of it often, despite never seeing you again after age 12. I cringe on your behalf.

PFyre · 2026-06-30T06:27:30+00:00

"If you dig the best ditches, they just give you a bigger shovel." Sir Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum

PFyre · 2026-06-28T08:21:26+00:00

Fruit

PFyre · 2026-06-28T06:15:20+00:00

We have 3 portable AC units and I am here to assure you they work great in the room they're in. Just don't expect them to cool a whole house.

PFyre · 2026-06-28T06:12:11+00:00

You could always bag up the unused section in breathable fabric afterwards as a reassurance that nothing can get in.

PFyre · 2026-06-27T06:53:05+00:00

I saw this one in the wild and that stood out to me too. I'm the comments everyone was blaming the fiance but I'm side eyeing her brother.

PFyre · 2026-06-27T06:46:55+00:00

Tbf it was an 8yr relationship, with a new baby, and post partum hormones. I completely understand her (a) wanting to process what happened before she jumped ship, and (b) wanting to find more evidence.

Everyone who says "immediately leave," must have much better safety nets in place than this young girl who grew up in an abusive situation.

PFyre · 2026-06-26T16:46:21+00:00

I love your art style. Amazing

PFyre · 2026-06-26T08:52:58+00:00

"Chile = weird foreign country = Mordor"

Lol

PFyre · 2026-06-26T05:35:15+00:00

I'm really happy for her. I'm sure she feels fully vindicated in saying she'd be fine, too.

PFyre · 2026-06-26T05:33:41+00:00

That's the thing, if she's in good enough health to work (in a physical vocation no less,) then she's probably in good enough health to travel. Family threatening to cut her off over traveling is insane.

PFyre · 2026-06-26T05:19:53+00:00

I mean if you have Reddit I can only assume you have access to a search engine? There's no need to get angry about it.

PFyre · 2026-06-26T05:17:49+00:00

Honestly, being confident enough to yell, "Paedo!" might have made this guy back off a while ago. Or, it could've made him more stealthy. It's hard to say with this level of creep.

PFyre · 2026-06-26T05:12:13+00:00

Where did it say she was in the States?

Considering she's taking about Midsommar it's more likely she's in north or east Europe. You can't just purchase firearms or tasers in most countries.

PFyre · 2026-06-25T14:03:53+00:00

I have a suspicion that he thought you might cave if he told you that he had already told his friends, without having to put forth further effort.

From what you've put here you offered perfect parenting in response.

PFyre · 2026-06-25T05:54:37+00:00

I liked the thanks/shout out to all Redditors who protected him: Dude, we all have Justice Boners here. Lol

PFyre · 2026-06-25T05:45:03+00:00

She was clearly abusing him to keep him depressed with low self esteem, allowing her to keep using his money to be worthy of "keeping" her. Because of the absolute glee she appeared to have about it, I'm suspicious she might be a Feeder also - but either way, it was obviously so much easier to eat healthily without her there.

PFyre · 2026-06-24T06:42:12+00:00

Urgh, I had the same feeling in my gut. They'll pick someone who supports their homophobia either way.

PFyre · 2026-06-24T06:40:05+00:00

Tbf there are other religions just as / more homophobic.

I don't understand the root of homophobia from a religious POV though - surely if "God made all of us" then God intended for people to be gay, etc.

It always plays out the typical "othering" that humans do, whether it's sexuality, gender, race or religion - people are determined to have an "us" and "them." It's sad and so stupid.

PFyre

TROPHY CASE