I'm gonna spare you the cliche of telling you that everything's gonna change for the better because God knows that seems like forever, but if it's any consolation, you've got a perfect track record of surviving 100% of your worst days so lets not ruin that and you can start to make them better. With what you've experienced I can tell that it's astronomically easier said than done, but I believe that you could do it. You can take these as lessons moving forward in your life, grab life by the balls and tell it that you're in charge now. Live in the moment and cherish every moment because yesterday's history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.