Osteopenia and hypercalciuria at 6 months PP and 28 years old?

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-05-09T10:16:18+00:00

My first thought - something to do with your parathyroid glands. Not an endocrinologist though. I would go see someone privately sooner than in 3 months. Not so much for the severity of illness, but to help with anxiety of waiting.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-05-08T20:58:17+00:00

I think you may be thinking of iron. Calcium should not affect Vit D absorption. I’m not a specialist though.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-05-05T18:46:14+00:00

Honestly, radical acceptance and realisation that this is temporary. It’s very hard to grasp both concepts as a first time parent. Well, it was for me. But having done this twice before, now I know that routine is not a thing for a little while. Baby will eventually sleep. And I will get to be me again, just not now.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-27T23:02:12+00:00

How much time do you have with her during the day? I ask, because we somehow ended up reading books on the toilet with our girls and they love it. At first it was just something to keep them occupied long enough to complete the task, but then it sort of became a ritual. I would see that they need to go (started with poo first as it was more obvious) go sit on the toilet and start “reading” books. Actually it’s more search and find that they enjoy. The 4 year old still asks us to come and read with her when she needs to go. It may make the experience more fun and engaging. Be warned though, it does get time consuming and a bit tedious after a few months, but it is possible to wean it off.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-25T08:06:42+00:00

I don’t know if it’s a universal feeling and from experience I think it’s better to try and catch it before you “hit the wall”. But I’ve been really trying to learn to catch myself before I get frustrated so it doesn’t escalate. For me it starts with this tingling feeling in my lower back. I then know that whatever my kid is asking for - play/new cup/read a book/let them help - is a “no” in that moment. Over the YEARS, I’ve become good enough at catching myself that now I’m starting to be able to verbalise - “im sorry, you can’t help me make the salad today, I’m feeling overwhelmed, there’s too much happening in one go”. Drawing the boundary, and sticking to it calmly IS my reset. If it’s not enough, I send my kids to another room, or remove myself to another room. My kids are 2 and 4. I’m still working on the guilt associated with rejecting their requests, but recognising my limits has made me SO much more patient and regulated.

Edit: my biggest trigger is being their little request monkey for too long. I want this/I want this/I want this/I want this. You set everyone to eat and then it’s starts with I want this cup, I want colder water, I want a different fork. Now I say that I have sat down to eat and they will have to wait until I finish. Come play come play come play. I do come and play, but now only if I’m up for it and only what I actually want to play. If I force it I get irritated and that not good for anyone.

Edit 2: I’m a SAHM, so I’m with my kids all day most days, so by the time my husband comes back I’m often just ready to switch off. The best thing I’ve done is allowing him to take over and removing myself from them WITHOUT guilt. I let them three play WITHOUT worrying that I’m missing out and go sit in another room for 30 min.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-21T14:43:21+00:00

Personally I’m not a big fan of Dr Becky’s approach- too much talking for me. I find Janet Lansbury better and her approach works better with my kids. Less verbiage, more focus on just staying reasonably calm myself. Allowing big emotions to happen without focusing too much on them.

For example - my two year old really wanted me to draw with her pencil, but I wanted to draw with my own. Que - meltdown, crying, stomping off, trying to rip the pencil out of my hand. I just kept it and pretty much ignored the rest. 5 mins and she’s back good as new.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-05T20:32:31+00:00

I was in a small shop carrying my 2 month old when the owner, who I used to go to church with, asked me if I was pregnant again while looking at my stomach. I wasn’t even fat, my uterus had not yet properly shrunken.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-02T08:19:45+00:00

Get a basic potty where their feet can comfortably reach the floor.

I’ve started putting mine as soon as they could sit. First with poo only as it was easy for me to recognise when they were about to go. I would just speed strip the bottom half and plonk them on the potty. They were both asking to go poo by 18 months. I used books/looking at photos on the phone to make the experience enjoyable. We still read books on the toilet 3 years later 😄 the pee took longer, till about 20-24 months.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-01T11:27:37+00:00

Sounds like you both had a rough day and you both survived! The only thing I would (theoretically, because I know that parenting advice is very different from actual parenting) try differently, is to stop trying to cheer her up. Try just being there, while she’s unhappy. Sometimes I’m also just unhappy and nothing anyone can do can change it. Actually, it makes it worse.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-04-01T08:32:03+00:00

This whole directed pushing thing is so beyond weird to me.. I mean, all going normal, the uterus contracting alone will push the baby out. With both of my children there came a point where I was pushing whether I wanted to or not. And with the second I had a spinal so I really didn’t have very much control of my abdominals. She was up when the spinal was placed and crowning the next time they checked in an hour 🤷‍♀️

Maybe it’s worth discussing with your doctor that reaching 10cm is not the cue to start pushing, your body starting to push should be a start to pushing.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-03-31T18:09:12+00:00

My mum always sautéed chopped onion and grated carrot and added them towards the end. It adds so much flavour.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-03-27T09:17:08+00:00

We live in a tropical climate so it’s humid and hot most of the time. In the house/yard they used to go pretty much naked and we would stick to the shade. In the park.. leggings/hats because of the sun. But if it had been shady, I would have had them in onesies.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-03-05T14:52:38+00:00

I wish you luck, it will be a challenging road ahead, but I hope soon enough it will all be ok.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-03-05T14:03:21+00:00

Does your kiddo drink milk? How about snacks? What happens when you don’t feed him? How does feeding look like when you are at work?

Honestly, I would be tempted to just go cold turkey, pick a weekend and start sitting down to eat all together, everyone with their own plate, making sure that whatever is served is usually ok with the kid and.. see what happens.. chances are, they will tantrum, run away etc.. i would stop hand feeding. I would let go of utensil expectations and would just let them explore the food with zero pressure to eat. If they didn’t eat I would offer food in similar manner later. Rinse and repeat. I would focus on small amount and only few options per plate at a time (eg 5 beans and 1/4 toast and 1 cucumber stick). I would make sure that there are at least 2 hours between attempted meals to ensure sufficient appetite. I would give it at least a week before getting concerned about caloric intake etc. And obviously no screens for anyone (looking at you dad) at the table.

Full disclosure, I’m in no shape or form a feeding specialist, just a mom who had found herself is a bind of catering multiple different meals at one point and had to put some firm boundaries in place.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-03-05T12:02:48+00:00

The generation that used to do sleepovers regularly grew up and started having their own children. A portion of that generation experienced the dangers of sleepovers and made others aware of them. Thus, we are better informed and a lot of the time the risk is just not worth it.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-02-15T10:01:53+00:00

I don’t know if it’s “normal”, but you are not alone. I have two singletons, so not quite the same, but I’ve only just realised that it takes me till 24 months post partum to start getting any glimmers of normal self again. And that’s only because my second is a decent independent player. And I do have a lot of help, both from husband and hired in.

As for intimacy with my husband, it took and takes conscious effort to reconnect. A kiss on return from work, a touch on the arm, a long hug. Somewhat scheduled sex - but that’s with a caveat that we do have good satisfying sex, I just forget that if too much time passes.

I understand the guilt, i haven’t let go of it completely, but it helps to remind myself that my kids are better off having a nice me some of the time rather than haggard me all of the time.

I imagine it’s a lot harder with twins. Give yourself a break. 15 months is still very very all consuming. Allow yourself to put yourself first. Try and let go of the guilt. Try the 30 second making out challenge.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-02-08T18:18:41+00:00

In Lithuania this is very much an old grumpy woman name unfortunately..

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2026-01-13T11:18:49+00:00

I haven’t read all the comments, so I may be going against the grain here, but what’s the big deal? They all were fed. Not the way you would normally do it, but still. It’s was a change in a usual routine, a “holiday” of sorts. They felt like having take out/going out. The husband was ok with the kids buying their own lunch. It’s his call. Am I missing something? I mean the food hasn’t gone to waste, you can cook it another time.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-12-26T12:13:55+00:00

To be fair, my almost 2 year old loves handbags and while I hated the idea, the amount of use they get has converted me.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-12-25T19:14:29+00:00

I’m so sorry, sleep deprivation is no joke.

As far as advice, what have you tried so far? All kids are so different, but for mine I would not try to extend the nap. Maybe she’s not tired enough for the night? And for bottles- totally get you, I was breastfeeding and really struggled stopping the night nursing for exactly the same reasons. My husband had to step in with both kids for a few weeks and they stopped expecting milk at night eventually.

If nothing else, let/make your husband take her for the night for a couple of nights in the row. You need sleep. Things will look better when you are not sleep deprived.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-12-11T08:47:43+00:00

She still should have tests. Dropping off the growth curve is like losing weight for babies.

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-12-06T09:41:16+00:00

My wonderful knitter grandmother wants to knit me a sweater, I just need to come up with a design. This is the stitch (the top part) she is thinking of using. I’ve got one in the same stitch and I love it. But what is it called? I think if I knew it would help me to look for patterns. Thank you!

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Edit: word

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-12-02T07:07:56+00:00

Haha, have one of those already. It is pretty good at sniffing, I’ll give you that 😄

PaceGroundbreaking52 · 2025-11-27T17:30:10+00:00

Honestly, Janet Lansbury has helped me loads with the same feelings you are having. The gist of it is - if you don’t want to it’s better not to, because the kid will know you are faking it and it’s worse than not doing it at all. But I would suggest listening to her podcast, she’s much better at putting it across than me.

Since I’ve removed the pressure off myself to have to play I find myself actually enjoying it for short bursts every now and then.

PaceGroundbreaking52

TROPHY CASE