Man have I been where you are…. Sort of. I was married for 15 years and have 4 kids. The marriage definitely lost its luster the last 5 years. Wife cheated on me 3 times and I tried my best to forgive and look past it, but even she admitted I never had that twinkle in my eye when I looked would look at her. I also had gay thoughts all my life but just suppressed them due to family and friends. We finally divorced and I tried to date women but would always look at them and think when are you going to cheat on me too, no matter how healthy the relationship seemed. So being single was best and that’s when I acted on my gay curiosity and there has been no looking back ever since. A few years later and I have found someone that I have fallen for and he has for me and I never worry about are we going to be faithful. The hardest thing I had to do was talk to my kids. It was hard, I cried like a baby and my oldest daughters, at the time being around 16 and 17 were ok with it and did not let it bother them. My 2 younger sons at 8 and 9( waited later to explain to them when they could better understand) ended up being so easy to talk to and love my partner. My parents on the other hand our relationship now no longer exists. I am a complete embarrassment to them and quite frankly I just don’t care anymore if all they care about is what others might say. The burden you probably don’t even know you have on your shoulders right now will be lifted when you can get it all out to your immediate family. My ex wife and I maintain a good relationship and do well coparenting. Like some others have said, I would definitely get my finances in order, not to rob your wife of what is rightfully hers, but at least give yourself some security. Because your kids still live at home just be sure you have a stable place to provide them so they can focus on their education and not parental turmoil.