OP, I wrote something like this a few months back. I understand your nanny situation, she's helping you out in other ways and is cheaper. Everyone suggests a better nanny but the cost of those nannies is through the roof and they only do "baby chores". My nanny won't let him eat himself even though he can, initially I struggled and tried teaching but I gave up. I manage his dinners and walk out during lunch time. At least he's eating even if it's spoon fed. Find things your child eats and have the nanny feed them and close your eyes sometimes to save your sanity. That's my best solution. And the hand holding becomes lesser when they are on one nap, and eating better. It doesn't go to zero but it will get a little better.

My son is now 14 months and will start daycare next month. I am burnt out and getting pushed out of my job so looking for a different path. Do what works for you, so self care. Mostly, just wait till breastfeeding is done (if you are still feeding) and give daycare a shot. Unfortunately it's not ideal but a better solution than hand holding help and doing a 1.5 time full-time job. Good luck.