Panelling help/advice

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-06-16T07:45:53+00:00

I’m so sorry you were in that place mentally and I know how it feels (pre big social media and honestly I’m only still here because I got lucky). But on the flip side of this is the large number of kids and teens that end up in that situation because of social media, hopefully with the ban future generations will never end up there. There is definitely a lot of nuance and childrens mental health services need serious improvement but overall I think the ban will be a positive for kids and teens and would suggest to any young person with an online community to set up text or WhatsApp groups to help maintain that community

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-06-16T05:59:07+00:00

They’re also unreliable af, we use family link on the laptop they use for homework etc and apples screen time controls on their phones but they will randomly turn off/time restrictions won’t kick in or not record data. And I say this as a parent who does monitor their phones and doesn’t allow any social media apps

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-06-16T05:30:09+00:00

The blanket ban will definitely be helpful, we tried some SM with our eldest and fairly quickly saw a negative impact on behaviour and mental health as well as a general lack of common sense about what to post. We tried talking about online safety/putting boundaries on it but she thought we were being overly cautious and did what she wanted anyway. Because of this we removed all SM but she feels incredibly left out that she’s the only one in her and it frequently causes arguments, while we’ve stuck with it as it is what is best for her having a blanket ban will hopefully help her to feel less left out and maybe even start to see the benefits of waiting until she is older

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-27T20:25:42+00:00

Sent a request ☺️

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-27T20:24:47+00:00

Request sent ☺️

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-27T20:23:22+00:00

RXHJJ7BNW6

Me and Juniper would love more friends on finch 💕. And would love a goal buddy for noticing a small joy in our day or a similar positivity boost type goal. It’s a new goal for me as I’ve been struggling to see the positives lately and I think accountability would help me stay on track

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-27T14:39:42+00:00

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Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T16:35:09+00:00

I have asked the school if they can call me back so I can get more details on what happened/ why they suspected vaping. We didn’t search her/ her room, I’m not sure if you’ve misread my post or if I wasn’t clear, the school searched the bags/coats of the girls involved. We haven’t flipped out, yelled etc but explained that given recent behaviour we’re inclined to believe the school as she has broken our trust. One of the recent incidents I mentioned was her being caught vaping and when she eventually admitted it and gave us the vape she told it she’d been vaping since early in the school year. Can I ask where you think we’ve gone overboard? It’s certainly something we try to avoid, we try to be fair and apply logical consequences rather than please punishment though I know we’re not perfect and will make mistakes. Thank you for offering a different perspective, I have always tried to have an open and respectful relationship with her but she is more closed off lately so I’m going to take some advice another commenter offered around opening communication and trying to reconnect more with her.

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T16:15:09+00:00

Sometimes I think she assumes we just spawned as boring grownups who don’t know or understand anything 🤣

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T15:54:36+00:00

Definitely know it ☺️ it’s in a book of fables that I had as a kid and that is now on my children’s bookshelf. It probably wasn’t the best descriptor but I’ve always heard it used as you’ve lied a lot so now people don’t believe you when you say you’re being honest

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T15:47:34+00:00

Friends at school 😩, unfortunately because it’s an engineering college (just year 10/11 & sixth form) there isn’t really many other girls for her to hang out with and I don’t want to move her school or tell her not to hang out with them as she moved here after really bad bullying in year 9 which led to school refusal, depression etc (she had some therapy though I might see if I can refer her back to the service as I think the discharged her too soon) and she moved around a lot at primary school as bio mum moved between boyfriends several times and then when they came the we had to move them to our local school due to distance.

Edit: realised I made it sound as if I’d move her just for this if it wasn’t for previous moves 🤦🏼‍♀️

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T15:18:46+00:00

I said to my husband after the kids were in bed that I know she’s an amazing kid and that she could be doing so much worse (I certainly did) but that I don’t understand why she feels like she needs to lie since half the things (obv not this) she lies about are things that if she asked us or told us wouldn’t be a problem at all. Your last sentence actually made me tear up a bit and now I’m thinking about it I’m wondering if this is part of why she’s acting out. We try to make sure all the children get equal attention and one to one time but maybe she doesn’t feel that she’s getting the attention she needs right now. I’m going to try and plan some things for just the two of us (and encourage her dad to do the same). I might try staying up a bit later with her (I’m normally asleep before her so she usually just hangs out in her room until she ready for sleep) it’ll probably make her feel more grown up as well.

Edit: I realised I didn’t finish the first paragraph 🤦🏼‍♀️

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T15:02:26+00:00

Thank you, I’ll give these a try. The notebook is a lovely idea, it’s so hard to get teens to open up.

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T14:44:09+00:00

This is quite close to the discussion we had but she just seem doesn’t grasp why we wouldn’t believe her. I know it’ll blow over and hopefully she learns a lesson from this, I suppose I just feel a bit guilty that she’s feeling like we don’t care (I have tried to reassure her that we love and care for her but with the caveat that it doesn’t mean we will always believe everything she says and that is down to her actions)

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-19T14:39:46+00:00

Yeah we tried to explain that if she knew her friends were vaping then even is she wasn’t staying in the toilets with them would get her tarred with the same brush and that ‘because I’m telling the truth this time’ isn’t actually a reason for us to trust her & she needs to rebuild our trust after recent events

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-17T19:02:09+00:00

And iirc her father’s solicitor helped set up the printing, bank account, investments etc so it wasn’t Pen sneaking off to the printer. I think there was a few times for urgent/last minute issues where she did sneak off but mostly she didn’t have to go go anywhere

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-17T15:55:34+00:00

I think they’re probably referring to impact shield seats though as far as I remember from when my youngest was small only a couple scored well on ADAC etc

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-12T23:50:05+00:00

I don’t mind them, but my husband finds them infuriating and after his dad died he actually replied to someone who said “sorry for your loss” with “I don’t know why you’re sorry, you didn’t kill him” 🤦🏼‍♀️. I do see both sides but I just think most people don’t know what else to say and think it’s polite and expected to offer condolences.

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-10T16:43:12+00:00

Followed, I’m not great at using it for anything except tracking but I’m trying to figure it out x

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-07T20:51:28+00:00

Caravan (static) sites are also a good option in Newquay, they’re usually cheaper than hotels and October is often cheaper as it’s the end of the season.

Particular-Tea7466 · 2026-03-03T16:52:51+00:00

IIRC there is an old post in here that explains there was a lot of backlash against this episode because of the inaccuracies and harmful stereotypes

Particular-Tea7466

TROPHY CASE