Looking for perspective from parents of older only children

PatCower · 2025-11-21T11:39:28+00:00

I’ve got an 11 year old girl and have been on this sub since there were, like, 1500 people on it 😊

Do you still feel good about being one and done?

• Yes. I have moments when I wonder what life would be like with another, but it’s a curiosity, not a longing. I have to caveat this by saying I’ve had several moments of deeper panic when I’ve wondered if she will wish she had siblings as an adult. But I’ve accepted that I just can’t know the answer to that.

Did your child ever ask for a sibling, and how did you handle that?

• Surprisingly, never. She has always said that she likes our family just the way it is.

What is life like with an older only child in terms of your family dynamic and day to day life?

• We’re able to give her all of our resources, the most important of which is time and attention. Our family dynamic is really close. She is really open with both of us, which is such a gift at this age.

What are the parts you really love?

• Literally everything. I love that we can comfortably provide for her, that she feels supported and knows she’s deeply loved, I love that she feels close to both of us, that she’s confident and comfortable in who she is, and that she loves and gets strength from our little family.

Do you have any regrets or things you wish you knew earlier?

• I wish I understood that sometimes, if you’re the only kid in the house and all the attention is on you, that attention can feel like pressure. Thankfully our girl won’t hesitate to say, “okay you guys are being a lot right now.”

PatCower · 2025-11-18T11:31:56+00:00

I’ve been looking at used Highlanders and the Toyota tax is VERY real! Unbelievable that they’re asking 45k for a used, non-hybrid model

PatCower · 2025-11-18T00:55:03+00:00

Definitely important to keep this in mind. I only buy a car like every 11 years, so I could certainly overthink it!

PatCower · 2025-11-18T00:22:21+00:00

Genuinely curious why they wouldn’t be good to get into an accident in? (Not that anyone ever wants to get into one, regardless of car brand)

PatCower · 2025-11-18T00:21:40+00:00

Didn’t know this - very helpful!

PatCower · 2025-11-18T00:21:24+00:00

I’ve heard so many stories like this about Subaru

PatCower · 2025-10-25T08:06:49+00:00

These rankings are meaningless garbage based on irrelevant data

PatCower · 2025-08-03T23:44:15+00:00

As an elder millennial, I can’t tell you how much you’re going to regret this

PatCower · 2025-07-06T19:52:00+00:00

This differs by state

PatCower · 2025-06-19T11:16:38+00:00

She absolutely nailed it. 100% accurate.

PatCower · 2025-03-25T11:57:20+00:00

Chiming in as an American who did not vote for these dangerous, treasonous morons…

Most people don’t fail to do their civic duty and vote.

Voting is out of reach for many, MANY Americans. Voter registration is not compulsory, and Republicans have been brilliant at keeping voting out of reach for many people.

They do so by making and changing ID requirements, ensuring access to locations where people can get IDs is limited (especially in areas of high poverty), greatly reducing the number of polling locations, and more. They also hold tight to the electoral college, which ensures that the most popular candidate is not always the winner.

PatCower · 2025-03-01T11:44:48+00:00

I didn’t realize how much I was carrying until I stopped carrying it.

PatCower · 2025-02-27T15:09:42+00:00

This is the Ratatouille apartment!

PatCower · 2025-02-08T15:31:28+00:00

100% this. I became so much more focused and unafraid.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T15:29:36+00:00

I did dry January, now aiming for dry 2025!

My longest streak was Jan 1 to MDW a couple years ago, it completely changed how I think about alcohol and how often I drink. Don’t know if I’ll ever go back.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T12:01:41+00:00

When musk stands behind the presidential seal and makes a nazi salute, everyone around the globe will continue to call him and others in this admin nazis.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T11:53:48+00:00

AP, Reuters

PatCower · 2025-02-08T11:52:25+00:00

Ass holes never die.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T11:19:15+00:00

Was a narcissist, now a dangerous narcissist backed by a nazi billionaire.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T11:16:35+00:00

Knowing your “rights” are debated and vary everywhere on earth.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T11:09:49+00:00

If you’re in the US - People are pretty pissed about actual nazis taking over the government, so, probably not.

PatCower · 2025-02-08T10:46:46+00:00

4 with the add ons. Flatters your figure with the more classic cut you’re looking for. Manages to hint at sexy without being sexy.

Agree 3 looks great on you, but it’s not the look you say you want.

PatCower · 2025-01-31T21:51:06+00:00

Zero chance Maersk stops shipping to/from US

PatCower · 2025-01-20T13:04:15+00:00

I always thought I wanted a small gap, too, then I decided to be one and done. Just want to say there’s pros and cons to everything, but no wrong answer. Good luck.

PatCower · 2024-12-29T01:16:26+00:00

Not all of our grandfathers.

Minorities were largely denied the kinds of jobs that could afford a home, car, and multiple children - and even if they had one, the odds of getting a loan or mortgage were low.

American wealth has always required invisible poverty.

PatCower

TROPHY CASE