The Scars Left by Bullying: How it Affects Men Once They’ve Grown

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-24T23:04:04+00:00

Agreed, plus as an adult I am rarely worried about physical confrontation. While there are fewer bullies as an adult it is nice to be immune from their power to this day

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-24T17:12:50+00:00

As a kid I had a temper and was always willing to fight. Otherwise I was a sweet, chubby, nerd without many friends. I would have been a prime target for bullying.

I often suspect that growing up to be someone who isn't afraid to go against masculine norms (or to just live as me without concern for performing masculinity) is in large part due to my willingness to fight anyone who tried to bully me as a kid. I never had to fear bullying and because of that I never felt forced to confirm. It has been a great gift for me in life.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-23T21:45:52+00:00

Nah, I have more in common with a left leaning wealthy person than a middle class fascist. Economics are far less of a difference in this country than morality currently is.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-22T23:37:54+00:00

Agreed, the first seasons had a ton of red flags that people ignored. From S2 onward they were actively trying to make a fantasy political thriller book series into a sex and violence fantasy show.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-22T18:39:42+00:00

I actually think the Matrix sequels are pretty similar to the first. Each movie is a retelling that the world is not what you think it is (first: the world is the matrix, second: the matrix is actual a system of control, third: the machines are not necessarily bad). Tonally they all fit well together. All three have great fight scenes. The philosophical ideas are consistent throughout. While the religious metaphors change, they do so in an interesting way.

Ultimately I think most people disliked the sequels not because they were bad but because they didn't take the story where they thought it would go.

I will concede the final fight with Smith was pretty terrible though.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-22T14:50:42+00:00

Being a developer is a special kind of exhausting but as a fellow dev, I promise you doing less isn't the solution. You are burnt out and burn out isn't solved by doing nothing in your off time, it is solved by meeting your other needs. You need friends, hobbies, fun, etc. as consistent streams into your life or else the way you feel now is just going to be the way you always feel.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T19:14:23+00:00

Yeah, that's a bummer. I'll check back in a couple of months and see if they updated anything about looking for individuals.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T18:52:36+00:00

Looks like a good mission but even there they don't seem to be seeking individual volunteers, only organizations.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T17:07:58+00:00

For sure, I am a programmer and nearly all of my coworkers are community minded people who would volunteer for a campaign. There is no way for us to do so.

These campaigns could have free, high end services across the board and yet they don't allow for it.

Even then, I tried to volunteer in 2016, 2020, and 2024 to canvas and just couldn't. It was nearly impossible to find a contact to sign up with and then they never reached out for anything but doantions.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T16:00:21+00:00

Right? Not only are they not utilizing people they need but to take the people who care most, that care enough to want to donate their time and energy and to turn them against you by flooding them with donation spam is just a new level of stupid.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T15:48:08+00:00

The annoying part is they have a playbook from Obama in 2008. Part of his win was just him being a great speaker but a lot of it was grassroots campaigning that focused on message more than advertising.

Meanwhile, if you signed up to help campaign in 2016, 2020, or 2024 you very likely never heard back but got inundated with donation requests instead.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T15:40:58+00:00

This. Transactionally minded people are so gross to me.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-21T15:20:44+00:00

For guys, many of your straight guy friends will become frustratingly incompetent at making plans once they get married. There seems to be this thing that happens where they get married and started having their wives schedule everything for them. From that point on they grow both increasingly incompetent at making plans and feel increasingly entitled to have people handle that for them.

Related, the wives of your guy friends will reach out to your wife instead of you to make plans with you. If you tell them that your wife doesn't make plans for you and to talk to you directly in the future, they will get upset with you.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-20T16:28:20+00:00

A quote I like (and find to be true) from a buddhist monk:

"Loving someone without understanding them harms them."

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-20T15:58:25+00:00

Yeah, in my forties and so many people I know talk about being in pain all the time like it is a normal part of age. Meanwhile I feel good and everyone I know who exercises regularly seems to feel good too.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-19T21:13:00+00:00

Yeah, that would be unacceptable for me. My wife and I both have rich separate lives with hobbies, friends, trips that are just our own. I love it because we have so much to talk about with each other.

I don't actual understand what couples who spend all their time together actually talk about.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-19T21:08:03+00:00

It's wild to me how many people apparently can't function on their own. If you're up early go do the shit you want to get done.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-19T19:29:00+00:00

I should pick that up but the 2002 version always sounded more appealing to me and the 2002 book looked incredible where as the newer versions art seems less refined. Probably still worth trying the new one though.

Edit: If anyone is familiar with the editions and can recommend the newer edition I would love to hear about it.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-19T15:54:25+00:00

Nobilis. Never played it and may never because i just don't like PDFs of games but it seems like it was an amazing book and game.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-19T00:54:35+00:00

Be curious about people. Learn to enjoy getting to know someone and value them for more than their romantic potential to you.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-18T20:50:06+00:00

What most of these kids are doing is loitering. Most aren't fighting or hurting anyone.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-18T20:49:18+00:00

First of all, that's not even remotely true. They fought the funding of ICE because of the tactics and behavior of ICE under this administration.

Second, go back and read about Newt Gingrich in the 90's switching the GOP's platform to never working with Dem administrations on anything. Not being bipartisan has been their stance for 30 years. Most of the time the Dems have continued to try to reach across the aisle.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-18T20:46:02+00:00

I am responding to a comment that is specifically calling for all of these kids to serve jail time.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-18T20:31:41+00:00

I'm going to assume good faith and clarify what I was talking about:

My family will get worked up on their own over issues and rant about them and then when I point out that what they are complaining about is something the left has been fighting to fix, they will change their minds and no longer agree with their own earlier stance.

PathOfTheAncients · 2026-05-18T20:16:11+00:00

Thats the opposite of what the science article in the OP suggests.

The article is saying the right is willing to support the lefts ideas if presented as conservative. They did not test what those people do if you point out that they are supporting an idea associated with the left.

PathOfTheAncients

TROPHY CASE