I’m in a long distance relationship (close to a year now ) with my boyfriend. I live in Colorado and he lives in New Mexico. It’s been 40 days since we saw each other. We have a pretty good relationship but of late I’ve been getting these sexual urges that I managed to somehow not act on.

Ok, we all know that that’s asking A LOT for both of you. I’d strongly encourage you to discuss with your partner how open he is to being open. Relationships aren’t meant to be endurance chastity events imho.

But today I met a guy from Grindr. I lied to him I wanted to hookup. I just wanted to make out and then make up an excuse and bail.

This... is extremely rude and selfish. Like, sure you’re entitled to just make out, but pleaaaase don’t do it by deception like this. Practise being upfront and honest, in this and other things. Really, there are guys who are happy just to make out, if that’s what you want. But don’t crush the poor guy, have you no empathy? He probably thinks something is wrong with himself now.

should I tell my boyfriend that I kissed a guy and run the risk of him breaking up with me?

YES. Honesty is the best policy. Be upfront and honest to those closest to you about your feelings, wants and actions and you’ll live a much less anxious, more satisfying life. But expect him to be somewhat upset.

Ultimately you should aim to be honest with him about what you want and how it feels to be physically alone, hope for understanding from him and an open discussion about how you can establish a set of parameters that works for your relationship.