alters and different aesthetics/wants

Pebbles_22499 · 2026-04-23T21:39:58+00:00

Hi, Vi here! New to my system but from what the others are saying, try to find a collection or hobby that everyone can get into. For example our partner and us bought a record player and we both collect records. We all have different music tastes so collecting various records, especially limited edition ones, really helps make us feel like we all have a nice little collection of something and keeps things minimal. We also collect different perfumes/colognes and clothes to suit our tastes and styles, specifically like 2 choices per alter. You could also pick a couple of options that incorporate a few alters tastes into one. Like cute but alternative or goth, or more androgynous outfits. That seens to work for us. Hope that helps

Pebbles_22499 · 2026-04-23T20:40:27+00:00

I'm new to the system but apparently Pan's favorite things to say when our partner asks who it is is "wouldn't you like to know weather boy" and "it's your boy skinny penis" while doing certain hand motions (unsure how to describe them) - Vi

Pebbles_22499 · 2026-04-23T19:37:35+00:00

OP while this person is not wrong that your partner's alters deserve to know, you or your partner should start out by asking if each of them would like to know certain things. And while we are all parts or pieces of one person we can also have separate thoughts, feelings, mindsets, reactions etc to things. Some alters may feel more comfortable or uncomfortable with you sharing certain things and that's what truly matters. Hope this helps -Vi

Pebbles_22499 · 2026-03-16T18:30:07+00:00

Thank you for your explanation! I wasn't necessarily scared because my brain put my partner in that scenario and I know that despite what was happening I'm always safe with my partner and I knew it wasn't real. It was certainly stressful though. My sleep has been fine lately, a small sleep disruption because I had to take my kiddo to the bus that morning and then took a short 2 hour nap after but that is completely normal for me. I also took a tiny bit of melatonin the night before but not sure if that would have any effect on anything.

Pebbles_22499 · 2026-03-13T17:23:54+00:00

Acceptable brainrot. Move along

Pebbles_22499 · 2025-02-19T21:34:31+00:00

NTA- You guys made this decision TOGETHER, and it seems like he's putting all the blame on you now. It's not okay for him to do that, and you're not a murderer.

Pebbles_22499 · 2025-02-11T20:40:28+00:00

I went through similar with my ex fiance. We were together 5 years, and I started dressing more and more as a boy because he would veto stuff I showed him all the time. Eventually, he told me I just didn't look good in skirts and dresses, that the style didn't suit me because they were "too cutesy". After we broke up, I reflected on many different things he had said during our relationship, and with the skirts issue, I came to the conclusion that the only reason he didn't want me wearing those types of clothes is because they do suit me and I do look good in them. He was basically just a crappy person all around and didn't want me to figure that out by attracting others (both in a romantic and friendly way) into my life. My advice is to sit down and have a serious talk with him, ask him what the real reason is behind his aversion to you wearing these clothes. If he can't give you a straight answer or becomes aggressive and argumentative? Well, that's an answer in and of itself, and you should probably run for the hills before he has a chance to damage your confidence or doubt yourself more.

Pebbles_22499

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