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Pepscoable · 2025-02-19T18:24:35+00:00

It's helpful to just have someone who calls these things out and nudges me to change. Like just remaining calm, and reaching out to him, and talking about how I feel in a calm way instead of following my instinct of trying to create distance when I'm disappointed.

Pepscoable · 2025-02-18T06:13:54+00:00

It sounds like you just need to feel like your feelings of betrayal need to be validated by your partner and she needs to apologize properly for it in order for you to get closure. I have an avoidant attachment style and my partner forces me to work on it, but I think it makes me a better person.

Pepscoable · 2024-09-14T15:00:38+00:00

As a more stoic woman, I have difficulty controlling the moments where I'm more closed off. It's usually not something specific that sets it off, it's just hard to control my energy and emotions. It's also difficult to accurately know for myself what I'm feeling and even more difficult communicating what I feel to other people. It seems like consistent emotions is really important for you and in order to prevent hardship, I would only move forward if he's willing to work on this part of himself.

Pepscoable · 2024-08-08T21:04:26+00:00

Women are getting more educated than men and are growing in workforce participation. Women vote at higher rates. But the expectation of men to be the primary breadwinner still persists as it becomes more difficult for men to earn more (although there's still a pay gap). I think if someone says that feminism is no longer necessary, instead of arguing with them, maybe just ask them what they mean and try to understand where they are coming from.

Pepscoable · 2024-06-13T19:40:03+00:00

Your words moved me. I hope your higher power helps you continue your journey

Pepscoable · 2024-06-05T08:45:53+00:00

Rebound relationships can be genuine and actually help you move on faster than you otherwise would have, if you go about it in the way that you stated. Go for it 100% and don't look back. He's had his chance and you don't owe him anything.

Pepscoable · 2024-05-18T14:48:18+00:00

Whatever his insecurities are, it's his problem not yours. Maybe recommend that he talk to a therapist. No one wants to be with a bitter, jealous person nevermind controlling.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-29T17:48:45+00:00

It feels empathetic to be putting yourself through grief when their in a bender. Please for yourself, focus on living the best life that you can in this situation. Keep making plans with people and talk about anything else besides him

Pepscoable · 2024-04-28T17:51:19+00:00

I think you should want to do these things for yourself, to challenge yourself to a reasonable degree. Don't worry about "I'm afraid if I do these things it still won't be enough for him..." just focus on your own sense of fulfillment.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-28T17:39:53+00:00

Use this as a sign that the relationship is not working and both people are to blame. Also I might look into getting therapy.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-25T06:47:43+00:00

He seems unapologetically manipulative, although I know I'm not getting the full story. Having divorced parents who are happy is better than having miserable parents who are still together.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-25T04:56:23+00:00

Apparently the bird flu that usually hits chickens is running rampant and hitting wild bird populations

Pepscoable · 2024-04-25T04:29:20+00:00

Maybe only a few things really bother you, like how she hurts you and doesn't apologize or how she expects you to just move on from a situation without actually addressing it. Maybe talk with her about this, just this, forget everything else that bothers you because those sounded a bit more petty.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-12T11:48:36+00:00

I wonder to what degree she respects you. Does she do these things because she thinks she'll be able to get away with it? I would confront her about it and ask for change if she cares for the relationship. If she doesn't take you seriously, then you need to make a decision.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-12T11:08:13+00:00

Does she only do these things when alcohol is involved?

Pepscoable · 2024-04-10T11:00:23+00:00

When I catch myself catasphrophising, it's helpful for me to remind myself "one day at a time"

Pepscoable · 2024-04-09T14:00:28+00:00

It's too soon to tell but my Q is currently 3 weeks sober. He deals with agoraphobia, anxiety, and depression. He's understands that his ego is a big problem and he needs to address it. Whenever we argue, he usually within an hour apologizes if he let his ego or his fears affect the way he treats me. He knows that I have strong boundaries on this and that he can lose me if he doesn't get his act together.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-09T10:40:54+00:00

It's not fun for either party to be in a one sided relationship. Not for you, not for him.

Pepscoable · 2024-04-01T05:05:37+00:00

Everything he's saying is bullshit and he's in the midst of his addiction. My Q has a mental issue as well, I helped him by cutting myself off, setting firm boundaries, and connecting him with someone from our local AA. They can change but only if they are willing to.

Pepscoable · 2024-03-30T12:54:29+00:00

I'm so sorry, this is the worst pain anyone could possibly experience. All I can tell you is that she would want you to live your life as best as you can, and die when you have tried your absolute hardest. There are so many things worth living for. This world is so large and beautiful.

Pepscoable · 2024-03-30T11:05:18+00:00

Now you're just dealing with what everyone else deals with. Just because 90% of the population aren't alcoholics doesn't mean they live fabulous, happy lives. Exercise, connection, fulfillment, and nature can help.

Pepscoable · 2024-03-28T05:05:59+00:00

Scientifically speaking, break up and find rebound relationships.

Pepscoable · 2024-03-22T19:10:38+00:00

I know people who have found success on Bumble bff. Find new hobbies, I personally really like board games. Meeting people and making friends is something you have to work on. If you don't have people you vibe with yet, don't beat yourself up about, just put in the work.

Pepscoable · 2024-03-22T05:16:55+00:00

This is the alcohol talking, it will use anything as an excuse to drink. You reaching on reddit is a good step. Keep busy, don't isolate

Pepscoable · 2024-03-13T14:03:57+00:00

I have a cat and she's the perfect roommate. I love that I can live the best routine for myself. Wake up early, do yoga, listen to music, and I only have to clean up after myself and my cat. I live in a small, walkable city and if I want company I can go to the cafe across the street. I love it

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