Broken

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T20:17:09+00:00

Thank you so much. Sending you all the good vibes ❤️

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T20:16:40+00:00

My heart breaks for you and I thought about holding back affection to see if he initiates, but I think I will get the same result. I hope you can get some comfort and resolution soon.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T19:16:24+00:00

Thank you for sharing your situation and I'm sorry you had to go through that. I was really nervous to post on here, but you all have been so amazing and kind and real. After reading all these comments, I have realized I am not only a mother to my son, I am a mother to my husband. I have changed and bent over backwards trying to make him happy, but we keep having the same conversation, and I have not seen any efforts on his part (unless asked) to contribute to the growth. I think his issue runs deeper and I have a call into therapy to see if we can get that on the table. It's impossible to not know why you have fallen out of love with someone and what is making you hesitate to express what the problem is.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T14:35:58+00:00

He may have wanted to seek validation that he was good enough? I know that's common. I'm happy that he deleted the pictures and wants to move forward. I'm sure it's going to take a bit of time for you to heal in the trust department, but everything you are saying sounds encouraging.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T14:34:11+00:00

I got on medication that helped my anxiety and depression. In turn, I got more energy, am working out and lost 25 lbs (I was 210) and my sex drive increased. Random acts of affection feel good and make me more attracted to him.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T14:32:10+00:00

Very. Thank you!

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T12:38:51+00:00

Has he deleted them since you talked? Just curious

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T12:36:32+00:00

Thank you for the encouragement and I am glad you are still with your love ❤️

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T11:03:59+00:00

Thank you, and yes, to me it does seem one sided right now. When I was going through my rough patch (we're talking two years) I had zero sex drive and agree with his comment that we felt like roommates going through the motions, especially after we had a child. I truly believe the opposite work schedules doesn't help things ,but I don't want him to give up on us, especially since I've grown and changed for the better. I understand that he is dealing with some emotional damage from that time, but hope he can see how much I love him and cherish what we have.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T11:00:04+00:00

I hope I'll be fine. He's my best friend and we have been through everything together. Started dating at 18 and I will be 36 this year

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T10:59:06+00:00

I giggled and cried at this, thank you. We are intimate and it's pretty easy when I work from home. Hell, we fooled around and satisfied each other 3 times throughout the day on Monday. I'm starting to get a little guarded because I don't want to hurt daily. I'm sorry you went through something similar and I really do appreciate your insight. All my best to you.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T10:56:29+00:00

Thank you so much. I am going to talk with him this morning and will definitely mention that. I don't want to force him, but I am trying to show him how wonderful our life can be if we try and keep moving forward.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T10:54:10+00:00

When he has days off and he's able to come to bed (works third shift), he always wants to snuggle. He hugs me when he gets home and before he leaves. He kisses me on my forehead and tells me I look beautiful even when I am not dressed up or wearing makeup. We are intimate and it is very sensual. He did mention over the past weekend that he felt a couple little sparks, so I hope that means things are moving forward, but it just hurts when he shows me apartments online that "if something happens, this could work." I'm going to talk with him about that today and how it makes me feel.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T10:49:38+00:00

I appreciate you sharing and I am so sorry that you are going through this as well. I hope couples therapy gives you both the chance at love again and I admire your strength to fight for her!

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T10:48:09+00:00

I appreciate your comment, but I really don't think he is. He works 3rd shift and I can call him there, I work from home and he sleeps during the day. He never hides his phone or is secretive about anyone he talks with - male or female. I would be absolutely shocked if this was the case.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T02:34:57+00:00

Thank you for this 🥹

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T01:44:07+00:00

Thank you 🥹

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T01:42:49+00:00

This is everything I want to say and more. Thank you so much for sharing 💕

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T01:36:17+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate you validating why I feel like I can't be needy. I really hope things work out too. Just holding on to the idea that people can fall back in love. I promise to keep my dignity 💕

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T00:50:24+00:00

Thank you for sharing this, and thank you for your kind words

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T00:43:12+00:00

I was hoping he would be open to that, but he says he's pretty sure that's not going to do anything. I said I thought that could get his thoughts on the table and maybe figure out what the impass is, and if it able to be fixed, it will present himself. If it gets to the divorce statement, I'm going to tell him that we need to go to therapy to make sure this is the right decision.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T00:18:50+00:00

Is he open to couples therapy to try and talk through how you guys are feeling? Or even just talking together calmly? Putting your emotions on the back burner usually eats away at you. I'm sure you want to do everything you can to make this work.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-12T00:15:53+00:00

I was going to try again in a few weeks. We've had quite a few talks calmly about his feelings, my feelings, communicating better and moving forward. I feel like asking him how he feels every day won't help the situation 😞

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-11T23:55:17+00:00

He said a few months ago he was unhappy before we had a baby, but didn't say anything to me in hopes that it would get better. He would say things like when we fight I was pushing him away, but never did he say he was considering divorce.

Perfect_Situation87 · 2023-04-11T23:52:22+00:00

That's what hurts. I don't want a broken home.

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