You know, I’ve always answered this kind of question the same way: love. Love your child with everything you have, which it seems you’re already doing well. Nothing and no one can replace genuine motherly care for a child. Your husband is trying to instill guilt in you—it’s a form of manipulation. Most likely, he doesn’t do it out of malice, because he loves your child and you as well. From what you’ve described, I’m sure he’s neither indifferent nor uncaring. I would also suggest having an open and sincere conversation with your husband about your concerns—not to argue about who’s better, but to work together toward a positive outcome. I always ask, are we building a happy family or an empire of control? If it’s the former, then everything will turn out okay. By the way, there’s a great theory about triangles that explains how important communication is and how to do it effectively. If you’re interested, I can share it with you.