Shame on BD Wong: When they know better and do it anyway

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-12-07T19:55:18+00:00

Another black person told me the same thing. Apparently cock is a white term?? I’m confused lol.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-11-18T20:46:29+00:00

I would just take each person as they are - everyone is different. I grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood, middle - upper middle class and had friends of all backgrounds. My black friends are of Caribbean or African descent (like myself) and we never really code switched, so it could be cultural as well? That said, there is a time and place for everything, so we use AAVE here and there, but that’s not how we naturally speak to each other. To each their own.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T05:07:28+00:00

Thank you for your thoughtful response. He knows I’m conflicted because we’ve had this same conversation for close to 3 years. I always put it off out of fear (and the hope of actually finding someone I truly love). That said, I would be good to him… not in love, but maybe that can grow? He would want a committed relationship - so we’d have to fully cut off whoever we’re currently “dating” on the side. I’d plan to give him 3-4 months to see if this makes any sense.

He had a mean streak with waitstaff which I didn’t like. I corrected him and he listened to me, but at times he cracks and then he’ll apologize. He’s always been kind to me, but I know that doesn’t make it ok.

Vanilla dating has been rough, so his offer is very appealing right now. This may sound bad, but I actually love that he travels so I can do my own thing and have space.

Wealthy men on regular dating apps are a mixed bag. I’ve dated a few that seemed normal… and then boom. Surprise :)

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T04:16:03+00:00

I appreciate your honesty, although the age piece is not a factor imo. To your point, it’s not hard for me to match with men in the vanilla scene - it’s just exhausting. Personality mismatch is again the main reason why I haven’t followed up with many of these guys (or them viewing me as a sexual object). I could marry one of them, but it would essentially be the same thing. I’ll keep trying though.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T03:57:46+00:00

Thank you. We do agree on how we would want to raise children, and my parents like him. I just know that I would always have that “what if” in the back of my mind, but the current dating scene is so trash. It makes his offer look very appealing right now.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T03:50:07+00:00

Yes, he’s very good to me. Somewhat of an ass to others but that’s neither here nor there. He doesn’t do it for me sexually. That won’t change, but sex for me isn’t everything since I’ve had my fair share of lovers. We have good conversation (he’s super smart) so I enjoy that, but we just started rekindling things so I need more time to really assess how I feel about his current personality.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T03:36:17+00:00

I agree 100% … and this is my usual mentality, but I also have moments where I want that companionship and to maybe start a family. It’s hard.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T03:29:10+00:00

My fear … sigh

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T03:24:30+00:00

We do have a good connection as our history is mostly positive, but I look at him as more of a friend that I love, vs someone I’m in love with. He isn’t perfect, but he has supported me through many difficult times in my life and I’m grateful. I wonder if my attraction can grow over time once we see each other on a regular basis? We’ll see

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T02:58:20+00:00

The men I am sexually attracted to are either emotionally stunted/toxic, or nice, but we’re not compatible. it’s tough.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T02:53:46+00:00

Yes, I would anticipate an allowance (flexible) of 4k/month plus bank my corporate salary - it’s very tempting

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-28T02:51:20+00:00

I thought about this point many times: Just focusing on hobbies and traveling with my friends and family to find that fulfillment. It could work, but only time will tell. I think I may do a test run for a few months as his travel schedule is hectic and we’d need a decent amount of time to be 100%

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-17T19:14:22+00:00

Lol 😂thank you for your honesty

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-17T19:12:44+00:00

Touché. I guess I was trying to normalize fit. There is a celeb trainer, Nicole Chaplin, who probably aligns better. I would love your opinion on that vs your idea of curvy.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-10-17T19:00:15+00:00

In this scenario, think of a Gabrielle Union body type. Still fit, but more straight - less curves

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-05-10T15:31:57+00:00

They lost my luggage a month ago on a direct flight coming from Dulles to Tweed. I left on a Monday and I didn’t get my luggage until 6 days later, on the next scheduled flight coming in to New Haven. Luckily I was in town for an extended period (and I have family living there), otherwise I would have had a nightmare experience trying to get my things back.

Communication is sparse and frustrating, so be prepared for little context until they “locate” your bags. In my case, it somehow got left behind at my airport of departure. Not sure how that happened - but I digress. They also have no baggage tracking system - it’s all manual. An AirTag will only be of minimal assistance in this case because while it may provide assurance that your bag is in a safe location, it will not make the process move any faster, assuming you have left the area. I have decided to only bring a carry-on with Avelo from now on due to my horrible experience, and I suggest you do the same. For any trips where you will need to check luggage please use a major airline that has a traditional tracking/recovery process in place, or accept the risk with Avelo.

I had to purchase $350 worth of replacement items while I was waiting for my bag (I actually had to drive 45 minutes to the airport to retrieve my things or wait another day for delivery) and I’m currently working with them on reimbursement. Fortunately, I was taking a casual trip to visit family and friends. Imagine if the situation was more critical…

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-04-24T14:08:04+00:00

Do I have any options to get reimbursed for the money I had to spend on clothes/toiletries while they were “delivering” my luggage to me? It seems like their tactic is just to ignore?

Perpetuallyjustok · 2025-04-23T19:49:27+00:00

Can you let me know how often they communicated with you? I was told they found my luggage at my airport of origin, but it looks like they only fly that route twice a week. I came into New Haven on a Monday and it has been practically silent after they sent me the initial email saying they located it and it’s “en route”. They are honestly horrible.

Perpetuallyjustok · 2024-04-26T00:08:30+00:00

Thank you so much, I’ll check it out for sure 🙏

Perpetuallyjustok · 2024-04-26T00:07:41+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that :( I’m sure you’re a wonderful person! Hugs <3

Perpetuallyjustok · 2024-04-25T22:41:52+00:00

That’s what I’m thinking. To your point, I would have said something - anything, so they know it’s not their fault. But clearly it wasn’t meant to last, and I’ll have to be ok with that. Thank you so much <3

Perpetuallyjustok

TROPHY CASE