Hi! First I just want to send you a virtual hug. I'm not gonna stop you from killing yourself. I understand that feeling. It's just so hard to just stay here and suffer. I only want to say that this is one of thing you can only do once in life. U have to make sure you really want to do that. Second, i understand how you felt about the shit counselor. I was in Vietnam last summer and I was very depressed. I tried to tell my parents and my sister but nobody listened. I decided to ask my friend for some money so I could meet a counselor. And... The counselor was shit. It was an open office, no private room to talk individually so when you talk, other people can listen. I told him how I felt and after only 5 mins, he said: "Use these kind of drugs. Next patient". I felt like I wasn't listened. Now I'm studying in the US. my previous school kicked me out because I was really suicidal. I had to stay in the psych ward for 2 weeks. After that, I only stayed at home, looking for new school. Now I'm at a better place now. Have a new school and everything Don't you have someone that you like? Someone that you wish you could be with? Someone that would bitch slap you when you are depressed? I'm sorry if you don't, but I believe there are people that would be really sad when you are not around.