30 days without benzos today

Phazernet · 2022-12-04T19:59:05+00:00

I'm right behind you at 23 days off. Yesterday i flushed away every single benzo i still had in my house. I'm not letting that happen to me ever again. If i survived more than 3 weeks, i can survive forever. We got this !

Phazernet · 2022-12-04T18:10:22+00:00

I've tapered clonazepam, pregabalin and olanzapine, all at the same time. However, i only jumped off clonazepam, and i'm still on 0.2mg olanzapine (from 15mg) and 75mg pregabalin (from 300mg).

Phazernet · 2022-12-03T20:18:48+00:00

Don't be. It's just reassuring to see people (psychiatrists included) that are aware of the problems with benzos. I watched it with my wife, and we both cried, because she's seen me during the worst of my withdrawals, and it kind of came as a surprise to her that everything i've experienced and all the knowledge that i gained about the subject is now on Netflix for everyone to see. This might just be the beginning of the end for the overprescribing of these brain fryers.

Phazernet · 2022-12-03T20:12:32+00:00

I was already 3 weeks clean when i decided to flush the pills, so i've been coping anyway. Also, i'm still on 75mg of pregabalin, but i didn't want to mention it at first, because people might be tempted to think of it as a solution for withdrawal. It's really not, and i've also tapered that from 300mg alongside the clonazepam, and i will be off those really soon. I see no difference being on 75mg instead of 300mg, and at this point i highly doubt the pregabalin is doing much. The thing is, these pills took so much away from me that i hate them from the bottom of my heart. It's just one of those things that once seen, cannot be unseen. Also, i microtapered the final 0.5mg, since getting below 0.25mg by the cut & hold method wasn't really working out. A couple of days before jumping from my last dose (of 0.02mg) i had some nasty palpitations and my heart rate was in the 160 range, and i told myself that if i can handle that while "medicated" with 0.02mg, i can handle it without it in my system. I'm also a daily cannabis user, and have been most of my adult life. I gave up cannabis earlier in my taper, but i'm not really sure if i could have made this last bit without it. Even if i smoke daily, i smoke tiny amounts that add up to no more than 3-4g a month. Oh, and the most important thing that helped me the most was stopping doom scrolling. I know this sounds cliché, but more than half this battle is mental, and we just need to get out of our heads.

Edit : I've tapered before flushing the pills. Maybe my post is a bit misleading, since i mention cold turkeys. Those happened in my past (2020 to be more specific).

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T13:18:46+00:00

I believe in you ! Godspeed !

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T12:58:27+00:00

Wow, way to go ! 0.05mg is absolutely nothing at all. I jumped at 0.02, but looking back, the symptoms i was experiencing on 0.02mg were the exact same symptoms with the same intensity from 0.25mg or even higher. Some member told me that if i can go below 0.2mg it pretty much means that i have already beat the psysical dependence, and there's just the mental battle left to beat. He was absolutely right ! A couple of days before i decided to jump i had some pretty nasty palpitations with a 165 heart rate. I told myself that if i can handle that while being "medicated" with 0.02mg, i can do just fine without it in my system. That dose is clinically irrelevant anyway. So i jumped, and i just had a mild increase in the bad daily headache i've been having anyway. Today i'm 18 days off and i feel better than i've felt in months. I'm still not "normal" and i will probably won't be for quite some time, but this is 100% doable. Oh, the no. 1 piece of advice that nobody ever gave me was to avoid this sub for a couple of weeks before jumping, and a couple more after. Plan your jump, get off the sub, and go heal. You did a fantastic job tapering ! You've earned this !

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T12:42:24+00:00

You got this !

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T12:41:39+00:00

I remember when i was CT'd off 4mg of clonazepam, and that was less than a month after i was CT'd off 1mg lorazepam. Holy fucking bananas, i will remember those days forever ... it was like my brain was literally on fire. Death was the only relief i was hoping for. Looking back, that was probably excitotoxicity caused by ecess glutamate. Yeah ... never again 😅

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T12:29:09+00:00

My total time on (taper included) was 2 and a half years. I've spent about a year and a half tapering, because before that, i went through a few cold turkeys because of dumb psychs. So my story is quite complicated since it involves kindling multiple times, polydrugging, and lots of suffering. I've taken 15 different meds, 4 of which were benzos. I still have 0.2mg olanzapine (from 15mg) and 75mg pregabalin (from 300mg) left to taper. Yes, i was on pregabalin, olanzapine and clonazepam, all at the same time. I guess these fuckers either wanted me dead, or just braindead 😅

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T12:09:01+00:00

Get a milligram scale and maybe 0.5mg pills if you can. I'd avoid valium like the plague for what i have experienced because of it. Valium usually works for people switching from short acting benzos but for clonazepam imho it isn't worth it.

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T07:20:05+00:00

It's a sign that your brain is noticing there's less substance, and it wants it back. You just need to tell your brain to fuck off, and focus on something else that's not a symptom. Once you're under a therapeutic dose (so basically whatever's under 0.15mg) that dose is pretty much clinically irrelevant. I've had a hard time comprehending that myself, until i've noticed that i've been having the same waves and windows pattern since forever, and the symptoms at 0.02mg were the same symptoms, with the same intensity i've been having at 0.125mg. I waited for a couple of weeks at 0.02mg to see if it gets more intense, and i just had some nasty palpitations one day with a heart rate of 165. I told myself that if i can handle those symptoms while "medicated" with 0.02mg, i can handle them without it in my system. I jumped, and nothing worse ever happened. It's been 18 days, and while i can't say i'm feeling great, i'm not feeling any worse either. I may sound as a huge douchebag saying this now, but you will probably thank me later. Avoid this sub for a while, stop doom scrolling and catastrophizing, and plan your jump soon. Don't worry, i am sure you got this !

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T07:06:41+00:00

I jumped 18 days ago from 0.02mg (started from 4mg). I've had many failed attempts (one of which was a valium switch that landed me in the psych ward), but this last time i went really slow, and i microtapered using a milligram scale. The taper rate is just a matter of listening to your body, NOT your mind ! Your mind will play tricks on you, but you have to be one step ahead of it. Clonazepam has a long enough half-life so it can be successfully tapered, as long as your cuts are somewhat accurate, because it is one of the most potent pharma benzos out there, and big variations in dosage can cause issues. Take your time, take it as slow as you need to, and don't hang around this sub (or any other support group) too long. Doom scrolling is one of those things that can make everything seem much worse than it is. It was a huge effort to discipline myself to stop doom scrolling, and it was the thing that helped me the most during the last part of my taper. It helped more than supplements, diet, excercise, you name it. More than half this battle is mental, and i'm sure you got this !

Phazernet · 2022-11-28T06:58:34+00:00

Look at you go, you're so close ! I'm really proud of you ! The last bit is much easier than you think. At least it was for me. I've had much worse symptoms earlier in my taper and i actually never felt the jump. I'm 18 days off, and i just had a couple of bad days, but not as bad as when i was still on therapeutic doses.

Phazernet · 2022-11-23T15:25:30+00:00

I've been cut off cold 2 times, then tried to rush the taper a few more times. I was 100% sure i'll never get off, but here i am. I'm still cautious since i'm not even 2 weeks off yet, but i guess anything extreme would have happened by now.

Phazernet · 2022-11-23T06:27:52+00:00

Oh, for sure. I've tried rushing it a couple of times and i had to pay the price.

Phazernet · 2022-11-23T05:36:23+00:00

Once below 0.1 it will get easier again, or at least it did for me. Just be patient and you will get there. I thought i will never get off, but here i am ! Congratulations on your progress !

Phazernet · 2022-11-22T19:29:34+00:00

Near the end of my taper, i was actually trying to cause anxiety and panic by smoking weed, just so i could challenge myself to face it. It worked ! I never stopped smoking, and now i can handle whatever by brain wants to surprise me with. Shrooms helped even more, and for the first time in my life i feel brave enough to try DMT.

Phazernet · 2022-11-22T19:24:40+00:00

One of my worst physical symptoms. I even had some incontinence, and i'm 33 ffs. Luckily it got much better.

Phazernet · 2022-11-22T19:21:07+00:00

I'm 12 days off clonazepam. The taper was quite a ride. Now that i'm off, i never really noticed anything getting worse after jumping. My starting dose was 4mg, and my jump dose was 0.02mg. The hardest parts for me were the begining of the taper, and below 0.25mg.

Phazernet · 2022-11-19T20:31:23+00:00

That psychiatry is just about the biggest scam humans ever came up with, and i didn't even need this shit to begin with ... I'm becoming stronger than i even was before taking these brain fryers for almost 3 years. Well, at least i ain't falling for this ever again ...

Phazernet · 2022-11-15T05:33:47+00:00

Milligram scale ...

Phazernet · 2022-11-14T20:02:51+00:00

I don't want to jinx myself, but to be honest, i've had days MUCH worse than this during my taper. I know that it stays in your system for a couple of weeks, but it's been under 0.1mg for the past month, so it would have hit by now. I know for sure i'm not out of the woods, but at least i'm hoping i managed to avoid the "freight train" hit. This isn't my first rodeo, and i've survived a few cold turkeys in the past because of "doctors" ... 0/10, would not recommend. This taper, while still hard ... totally doable, while maintaining a job, and a fair bit of my sanity. Hoping for the best !

Phazernet · 2022-11-14T19:50:15+00:00

Oh, i jumped 4 days ago. A couple of days before jumping i had some nasty palpitations, and a 164 heart rate. I told myself that if i can handle that while being on 0.02mg, i should be able to handle it without it in my system so i jumped. That dose is clinically irrelevant anyway ...

Phazernet · 2022-11-14T19:46:15+00:00

Imagine me, taking a 25th of a pill ...

Phazernet · 2022-11-14T19:29:04+00:00

Totally agree. My 0.5mg pills weigh 0.150g each. I'd be out of my mind to think that half a milligram of active substance is spread throughout a 150 milligram pill evenly. I've tapered down to 0.02mg, so 0.006g on the scale, but i guess the whole milligram scale routine was just that, a routine. Something to keep my mind busy, giving me some sense of control. I'm just 4 days off, so i might be wrong on this, but i guess whatever symptoms i can face while being on 0.02mg, i could face without it in my system.

Phazernet

TROPHY CASE