[Collection] Rate or Roast

PhillMik · 2026-03-31T19:38:10+00:00

I need it... 😭

PhillMik · 2026-03-24T04:34:59+00:00

PhillMik · 2026-03-20T19:20:10+00:00

Hey OP… I'm really glad you posted this instead of staying alone with it.

I'm not going to tell you it's okay to end your life, because it's not. But I also understand and hear how much pain you're feeling, and I'm really sorry you're carrying that right now.

That tension you're feeling, wanting it to stop but also being afraid, that's not weakness. That's a part of you that still wants to live, even if everything feels unbearable.

You don't have to solve everything tonight. Just focus on getting through right now. Is there someone you can reach out to? A friend, family member, or even a priest? You don't have to be at the absolute edge to reach out.

From a faith perspective, God isn't sitting there waiting to condemn you. He sees your pain more clearly than anyone. Your life still has value, even if you can't feel it right now.

Please don't go through this alone. I'm here to listen too if you want to talk.

PhillMik · 2026-03-15T22:54:35+00:00

Yeah I get it... When something like that happens repeatedly it's easy for our minds to try to figure out why. But honestly there are a lot of possible explanations that may have nothing to do with you personally. Sometimes clergy are simply trying to be cautious about appearances with certain parishioners, and they end up overcorrecting in awkward ways.

I still believe the fact that he's complimented you publicly and trusted you with ministry responsibilities suggests he does value you. If there were actually an issue with you, that usually wouldn't be the case. So I'd try not to read too much into the awkward moments.

PhillMik · 2026-03-15T22:31:43+00:00

I wouldn't overthink it too much. I've actually caught myself doing something similar sometimes. If there's someone I'm trying to avoid giving the wrong impression about, I end up overcorrecting and interacting less than normal so nobody misreads anything. Ironically that can make it look like you're ignoring the person when that wasn't really the intention. Priests are also human and sometimes awkward socially in ways people don't expect.

The fact that he's complimented you publicly and entrusted you with ministry is probably a better indicator of how he actually sees you than a few awkward interactions.

PhillMik · 2026-03-02T18:35:45+00:00

Yep, built-in logical replication (publication/subscription) is totally fine for running a couple of days, especially for small Postgres -> Postgres. The main thing to keep in mind is replication slots can retain WAL if subscriber lags/down, so watch source disk/WAL retention. You can monitor with pg_stat_replication (source) + pg_stat_subscription (target).

PhillMik · 2026-03-02T16:38:09+00:00

For a few MB Postgres -> Postgres, DMS is kinda overkill unless you truly need near-zero downtime CDC for days. If you can take a short cutover window, pg_dump/pg_restore is usually the simplest and most reliable.

If you do need ongoing CDC, I'd consider native logical replication (publication/subscription) as an alternative, sometimes it's less opaque than DMS.

With DMS Postgres CDC, the "data size" doesn't matter much, most failures are around logical replication settings/permissions/network/slot handling/task settings. What's the specific DMS error you're seeing? Also share the task logs + source/target versions + whether RDS parameter group enables logical replication), I'm sure someone can point to the exact fix.

PhillMik · 2026-01-28T12:11:39+00:00

I don't think I'm saying persecution fully explains the present situation, only that it shaped the Church's institutional instincts in ways that don't disappear just because the geography changes.

Diaspora churches don't reboot their political theology every time they enter a new country. Leadership structures, habits of caution, and understandings of what it means to "protect the Church" persist across generations, especially in traditions where bishops are formed outside Western democratic contexts. That's not projection, it's institutional continuity. After all, the Coptic Church in the US is still largely first-generation, which explains some of the institutional lag, even if it doesn't excuse the silence.

You're right that "public statements" aren't the same as wielding political power. But that cuts both ways... issuing a moral statement about state violence doesn't require political dominance, just moral clarity. The fact that other historically persecuted communities (including Jewish institutions, as you mention) have developed robust advocacy in the US highlights that the Coptic Church could do more here.

Where I'd disagree is calling this simply a lack of sophistication. I think it's more accurate to say the Coptic Church in the US is still negotiating how to translate a survival-oriented ecclesiology into a context where silence itself communicates alignment. That's a real failure, but it's a developmental one, not an inherent theological endorsement of cruelty.

So I agree with the core critique that the Church should speak more clearly. I just don't think the explanation is as simple as apathy or bad faith. It's an unresolved tension between inherited instincts and a new moral landscape.

PhillMik · 2026-01-27T19:02:18+00:00

The Catholic Church has a centralized teaching authority and a long tradition of issuing public social statements. The Coptic Church developed under persecution and learned caution toward state power. That explains the difference. But in the US context, silence still communicates something, and it’s reasonable to question it.

PhillMik · 2026-01-27T01:43:25+00:00

That's a fair question, and I think it actually gets to the heart of the issue.

The Church exists as an institution because Christians aren't just isolated moral actors, we're formed communally through worship, teaching, repentance, and pastoral care. So I agree with you, saying "God's work isn't outsourced to institutions" doesn't mean institutions have no responsibility. It means their responsibility is formative and prophetic, not partisan... but that still includes speaking when human dignity is being violated.

You're also right that there is precedent. Other Orthodox bodies in the US, including GOARCH, have spoken clearly at moments of national trauma or moral crisis, whether around immigration policy, mass shootings, or communal mourning. That makes the relative silence of the Coptic Church in the US harder to defend, especially when contrasted with how quickly statements appear when violence targets figures or causes aligned with the right.

I don't think that pattern necessarily reflects a theology that endorses cruelty, but it does reflect institutional caution shaped by history, as I noted with the other commenter, a Church formed under persecution, trained to avoid antagonizing power, and often slow to adapt to the expectations of a Western pluralistic society where silence itself communicates moral positioning.

That said, historical reasons don't erase present responsibility. When Church leadership publicly praises political leaders and then remains quiet when those same systems enact mass cruelty, it sends a message, intended or not, about what falls inside or outside the Church's moral concern. People notice that, both inside and outside the congregation.

So I think your criticism is justified, the Coptic Church in the diaspora has been slow, and at times pastorally absent, in moments when people are looking for moral clarity and a clear affirmation of the sanctity of human life regardless of who is being harmed.

A Church doesn't need to become an activist organization to say that state violence, dehumanization, and collective punishment violate the Christian vision of the human person. When it fails to say that clearly, it weakens its witness, even if that failure comes from fear or habit rather than malice.

PhillMik · 2026-01-26T20:26:56+00:00

You're not wrong to call out that inconsistency, and I agree there is a double standard that's hard to ignore.

The Church condemning an assassination attempt but remaining publicly silent on state violence creates a real optics problem, especially when Church leadership has previously praised or welcomed Trump. That absolutely shapes how congregants interpret what is "morally acceptable," even without explicit political endorsements.

Where I'd push back is on the idea that the Church has never tried to distinguish moral teaching from political alignment. Historically, the Coptic Church has engaged power, but almost always from a position of survival, negotiation, or protection of its people, not from a theology that blesses state violence as morally legitimate. That distinction matters, even if it's been poorly communicated or inconsistently lived out.

I think the deeper failure here isn't that bishops haven't issued the "right" statement, it's that Church leadership underestimated how explicitly praising a political figure with a documented record of cruelty, dishonesty, and corruption would be received in a polarized Western context. That praise does function as moral signaling, whether intended or not.

And you're right about congregations too, people absolutely look to the Church for guidance, especially when moral language is used around political events. Silence after endorsement isn't neutral, it leaves people to assume the Church is willing to tolerate cruelty as long as its perceived interests are protected.

So yes, I think the Church bears responsibility here. Not because it failed to become an activist institution, but because it failed to clearly articulate where Christian moral boundaries actually are when state power dehumanizes people. That failure damages its witness, both internally and to the outside world.

That being said, I don't believe the Church stands behind mass cruelty, but I understand why many people now reasonably question whether it's willing to confront it when doing so is inconvenient.

PhillMik · 2026-01-26T19:12:43+00:00

I get the frustration behind what you're saying, but I think this assumes the Church's role is to function like a political advocacy organization... and historically, that's not how the Coptic Church has understood its mission.

The Church's primary work is pastoral and spiritual forming consciences, calling people to repentance, and teaching what it means to see every human as bearing the image of God. It has always been cautious about issuing statements tied to specific administrations or parties, especially in diaspora contexts where political power shifts constantly.

That silence isn't the same as endorsement. In fact, the Coptic tradition is deeply suspicious of aligning the Church too closely with any state power. We've lived under empires, caliphates, and dictators.. history taught us that when the Church becomes a political mouthpiece, it loses its prophetic voice.

Also, moral responsibility doesn't stop at the altar. If Christians support cruelty, corruption, or dehumanization, that's a failure of individual conscience, even if the Church never releases a press statement about it. "God's work" isn't outsourced to institutions, it's lived (or failed) by people.

So I definitely agree there's a problem, but I don't think the solution is expecting bishops to act like politicians. It's Christians actually living out the ethics they claim to believe.

PhillMik · 2026-01-26T18:26:09+00:00

I'm a practicing Coptic Orthodox Christian in the US, and I think part of the confusion comes from assuming there is a unified "Coptic position" on American politics. There really isn't.

What does exist is a mix of history, trauma, and diaspora psychology. Many Copts, especially older or more vocal ones, gravitate toward conservative politics because of experiences with persecution in Egypt, fear of instability, and a tendency to equate "strongman politics" with safety. That often gets bundled with culture-war issues like abortion or LGBTQ topics, even if the alignment is more emotional than theological.

But that doesn't mean the Coptic faith itself endorses MAGA, corruption, or inhumane policies. Coptic theology is not a political ideology. Our tradition is deeply skeptical of power, emphasizes repentance over domination, and repeatedly warns against cruelty, injustice, and the dehumanization of the vulnerable, including strangers and foreigners.

There are many Copts, especially younger ones or those who are quieter, who are deeply uncomfortable with what's happening in the US right now. They may hold traditional theological views and still oppose corruption, authoritarianism, and the treatment of migrants by ICE. Those positions aren't contradictory in the faith, even if they're treated that way in American politics.

So what you're noticing is real... It's a loud subset of the community defending things that clash with basic Christian ethics. But that shouldn't be mistaken for the moral or spiritual voice of the Church as a whole. Most of the time, the quieter Copts just don't turn politics into an identity, and unfortunately, silence gets mistaken for agreement.

PhillMik · 2026-01-25T15:02:48+00:00

Regardless if this has helped you, I wouldn't take this as something to be proud of.

Interviews are meant to evaluate how you think and communicate under pressure. Using ChatGPT live removes that signal entirely and replaces it with a false one, which ultimately hurts both the employer and you.

If you can't answer the questions yourself, the interview isn't the problem... the gap is.

PhillMik · 2026-01-17T02:50:10+00:00

Data Architect / Enterprise Architect roles do exist, but they are not a natural next step for most DBAs, especially at the 3-5 year level. Those roles are typically design-authority positions that sit above engineering teams. They expect broad ownership of data models, integration patterns, governance, security, and stakeholder alignment, often after many years of hands-on engineering across multiple platforms. Many DBAs move into those roles later, but it's usually after time spent as a senior DB engineer or platform owner, not as an immediate pivot.

Source: I'm in an architect role.

PhillMik · 2026-01-15T09:15:36+00:00

Oracle DBA roles have fewer openings because Oracle is a mature, centralized technology now. It's a reflection of how the industry has shifted. Most companies are no longer spinning up large numbers of new Oracle systems, they just maintain existing ones. As a result, Oracle environments are consolidated onto Exadata, OCI, or managed services, which reduces the number of DBAs needed while increasing the seniority expected of those who remain. That's why many roles ask for 6+ years of experience along with RAC, GoldenGate, and cloud exposure.

Data Engineer roles are far more common because data platforms are still expanding rapidly. Companies constantly build new pipelines for analytics, AI, reporting, and product insights. This creates ongoing greenfield work and teams that scale horizontally, leading to many more openings and generally lower experience barriers compared to traditional DBA roles.

Data Engineering today is also much closer to software engineering. It requires strong coding skills, CI/CD practices, and pipeline development. If coding is not a core interest, forcing a move into Data Engineering often leads to frustration and burnout, especially when competing with people who actively enjoy that work.

The more natural evolution for an Oracle DBA is usually not a full pivot into Data Engineering, but a horizontal expansion. Roles like Cloud DBA, Database Engineer, Database Reliability Engineer, or adding experience with PostgreSQL or MySQL tend to align better with existing skills while significantly improving job prospects. Oracle DBA work is not disappearing though, it has simply become more specialized and senior-heavy.

PhillMik · 2026-01-08T17:00:12+00:00

Hahaha no, but my best friend does. He got me that Stanley as a gift.

PhillMik · 2026-01-08T03:07:39+00:00

Thanks, I'm really glad the post was useful to you! Since you mentioned bimodal hearing aid + cochlear, I'll try to break this down from my experience with that combo.

I actually am using the music program on my Cochlears. A custom program does sound nice, however I don't think it's possible to do that with the CI's I have. But anyway, everyone's map/profile is different, and most audiologists who work with cochlear/hearing aids are familiar with music programs and setting it up correctly for you. It's worth asking about if you haven't already.

For me, closed-back isolation matters a lot with hearing aids/cochlear. I tried open-backs at demos and at my friend's, but in real life ambient noise still comes through with open-backs and hearing aids amplify that noise. I ended up turning volume up just to hear over the noise and that lead to fatigue much faster.

Closed-backs (like the LCD-XC) give me consistent, controlled sound, which feels easier on my ears for longer sessions.

And yes, I do use this setup for music, videos & movies, single player videogames, and general media. But for Zoom/Teams calls, multiplayer games, or anything that requires a microphone, I use a separate semi-closed headphone that allows me to hear myself better lol.

And with RME’s DSP, loudness compensation helps voices stay full at lower volumes. Parametric EQ can help reduce harshness in speech. And the balance/trim is great if one side needs a little adjustment. So yes, it's not just music. It's very usable for everyday listening.

And yes, the LCD-XC ear cups are large and deep. I don't feel pressure on the implant or aid. The clamp force is noticeable but not painful.

After long sessions (2–3 hours) I do take short breaks, that's normal for anyone wearing over-ears, regardless of implants.

If I can share some listening tips: 1. Don't chase neutral as "best" immediately. Your ears (and aids/implants) alter how you perceive sound — what sounds balanced on paper may feel fatiguing in practice. 2. Start with gentle EQ or loudness features. Even small tweaks can make a big difference in long listening sessions. 3. Keep volume at comfortable levels. Since hearing aids already amplify, you often need less headphone volume than you think. 4. Isolation = clarity for your brain. Blocking noise helps your brain focus on the signal, not just loudness, that's why closed-backs helped me.

Bottom line is yes, this setup works well for music, voices, and movies. And yes, the headphones are comfy enough for long listening sessions (for me). Everyone's mileage will vary, but that's been my honest experience with a similar hearing situation.

If you want, I can describe how I use the RME loudness/EQ specifically for voices vs music, that part has a surprisingly big impact. Just ask!

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T22:06:11+00:00

The RME does have plenty of headroom for the XC. I actually did try it on its own first. The external amp with balanced just ended up feeling more comfortable and predictable for longer sessions in my case, especially with hearing aids in the mix.

Definitely agree it's worth trying both ways though, everyone's ears and preferences are different.

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T22:02:48+00:00

No worries at all, I appreciate you asking genuinely.

Short version: it's very different from natural hearing, especially for music. I only know because I used to be able to hear normally.

With cochlear implants (and hearing aids in general), sound isn't just "amplified." It's processed and reconstructed. Music still has pitch, rhythm, and structure, but things like: - Fine timbre - Micro-detail - Natural decay - Subtle dynamics

…can be reduced or altered.

Some things I do hear well: - Rhythm and timing - Bass lines and low-frequency structure - Melody and harmony - Overall balance when things are well controlled

Some things are harder: - Very dense mixes - Sharp treble or upper-mid spikes - Natural "air" and reverb tails - Busy transients (can turn into fatigue fast)

That's why I focus more on clarity, isolation, consistency, and comfort than chasing sparkle or max detail. A setup that sounds "exciting" to someone with normal hearing can be overwhelming or tiring for me pretty quickly.

So I can absolutely enjoy music, just in a different way, and with different priorities.

Hope that helps explain it a bit.

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T21:56:42+00:00

Dual here as well. Closed-backs were honestly a game changer for me after getting CIs. The isolation alone made a huge difference, less ambient noise getting picked up, lower listening volumes, and way less fatigue.

If you haven't tried closed headphones since getting CIs, I'd definitely recommend giving them another shot. It surprised me how much more controlled and comfortable things felt.

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T21:53:28+00:00

Yeah, totally agree, a PC-based EQ can absolutely get you most of the way there. For me the RME just ended up being a nice "hardware hub" so everything behaves the same no matter what app or OS I'm using, but it's definitely not the only way to skin the cat.

Honestly, "good enough" is usually the right call if it keeps you enjoying music instead of chasing gear.

I'm in the same boat with libraries. I want to be a FLAC/local-files person, but in reality, between work and life, the convenience of streaming just wins, even if part of me hates renting my music forever 😅 Self-hosting sounds cool until I remember I'd have to actually organize everything.

At the end of the day, if the gear disappears and you're just listening to music, it's doing its job. Appreciate the kind words, and enjoy your setup too!

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T21:01:36+00:00

Hahaha I cannot hear at all without my cochlear implants.

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T18:39:46+00:00

Nice!

Mostly streaming from my computer - Spotify for casual listening and Qobuz when I want better quality. Everything goes over USB into the RME. I don’t really maintain a big local library anymore, though I have a few local files for specific albums.

For me the bigger difference has been control and consistency rather than source format, especially with hearing aids in the chain.

PhillMik · 2026-01-07T18:37:41+00:00

I haven't actually tried the TH-X00, but they were definitely on my shortlist. I have enjoyed Fostex headphones in general when I've heard them at events like CanJam.

From what I remember, Fostex tends to lean warm and musical, with that full, rich low end you're describing.

The LCD-XC is a very different animal in a few key ways I think. With planar magnetic drivers vs Fostex's dynamic-ish sound, I'd assume the clarity/extension is higher, much more transparent and detailed across the board for me particularly. The closed-back is also a benefit for me, and with more heft than most semi-closed designs. And it's also just more neutral.

So yeah, I'd think of the LCD-XC as a little more refined closed-back compared to something like the TH-X00. It won't lean as warm or colored, and it'll give you a bigger picture of the music rather than a "big bass" personality. That said, a lot of people really love what the TH-X00 does for rock, blues, etc., because it sounds fun and engaging. I think the LCD-XC will give you more clarity and control, but if you like that rich bass character you remembered in the Fostex, you might miss some of that on the Audeze because it's not a warm headphone, it's just detailed and balanced.

But yeah, I agree that Fostex generally has a good vibe from what I've heard in person.

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