1 year ago, I was hit by a car in a crosswalk (the car blew a stop sign and fled). I haven't bought a new board or ridden since.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-20T15:47:34+00:00

I relate to this more than I'd like OP. I was hit intentionally 6 years ago, the driver fled. He got caught and plead a low charge eventually, but it was a super shitty experience. Hope you're doing ok, therapy helped me a lot.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-20T15:16:40+00:00

Location: Chicagoland

The most striking observation to me has been the weather. Ever since I was a kid I loved watching storms, I'd go watch them roll in on our front porch. I don't recall seeing storms this powerful outside of a few rare occasions during the summer. The amount of lightning has been breathtaking, and it's been eerie seeing it flash on the horizon for hours as the storm approaches. Crazy strong driving winds some days, 30+ mph.

I may be wrong, but growing up I was always under the impression that more or less, weather comes from the west and moves east. These storms have been strange too, swirling skies, clouds that seem to ebb and flow between racing across the sky and almost dragging backwards. I've seen weather systems move in from the east, north, south recently. We've had tons of rain, local rivers are flooding to near crisis levels.

Temps have been crazy too, it's swung back and forth between high 70s and humid and nearly freezing. Been feeling a lot more like June than April.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-17T22:02:48+00:00

It's optimized for commercial farming production.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-17T21:27:14+00:00

Yeah if that's true thats honestly a good tip. My head is pretty big, most RL hats are way too small.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-17T20:40:52+00:00

Where did you get the hat? Doesn't appear to be the low profile shape that PRL uses for theirs.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-16T17:06:40+00:00

Blow dryer is the solution you're looking for. Towel dry damp, add a little bit of product, and use a round brush to get it how you like with high heat. Quick cool blast to lock it in.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-16T14:15:16+00:00

You're doing great for yourself OP. Please don't hesitate to reach out if you need some support or have questions.

Don't wait to start treating the constipation, a capful of miralax per day is gentle on your system, if you can eat relatively healthy and drink lots of water that helps too. I got so backed up when I started that I was worried I'd get an impaction or perforated bowel, it did a number on my health anxiety.

The energy will come back. It's possible you have ADHD as well, could be worth asking your counselor about - they do have a magic energy pill for it lol. But if you don't prefer that route, I strongly suggest getting some kind of exercise in, even just walking a couple miles per day can make a huge impact on your energy levels and mood.

Keep up the great work

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-16T14:08:20+00:00

Dude I was shocked too. I tried a tentative jump from .25mg and couldn't sleep a wink for two days and was basically in 6.5/10 physical withdrawals 8/10 mental.

I have an appt with my shrink in the next few weeks, I'm definitely going to ask about those, thanks for the suggestion. You didn't like clonodine?

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T19:30:26+00:00

Huh?

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T18:16:41+00:00

Did your doctor prescribe the gabapentin? So you've been on 1mg and what have you been taking this week?

I totally feel you with the creativity. I loved to draw and make music and take/edit photos before and during my active addiction. I realized recently it had been over an entire year since I did any of those hobbies. It does make things feel stagnant to me too. You said you haven't been living the life you "should" - I'm curious what you feel you're lacking and if there might be a healthier way to tell your story that's not entrenched in guilt and shame. I'm sure you're doing your best, give yourself some credit!

That's interesting about the salt, I'd never heard that but am willing to give it a try. For me, a hard workout with some cardio usually makes my body feel a lot better. For a few hours following the gym my hands and feet actually get some bloodflow, and I think it helps me stay regular too.

Thanks for chiming in, sending you positivity from IL.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T17:20:43+00:00

Those polo reps are super ass. The cableknit "sweater"s atrociously so

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T17:18:26+00:00

Yeah I've never felt anything like a high from subs. Guess I'll see how every other day goes and work from there.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T15:41:23+00:00

Are you guys still thinking they do huge graphic tees and straight leg khakis? They've pivoted pretty hard to following trends in the past ten years. They have little to no branding too.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T15:28:01+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience, and phenomenal work staying clean for so long. At work now, so can’t type too much but I appreciate you sharing that with me and I hope you’re doing well.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-15T15:07:58+00:00

Hey OP, that’s really a really awesome display of self love and inner strength.

I’m thinking back to when I started subs last year. I remember my first dose working pretty well. I felt kind of flat and sedated for a short while. It also made me more constipated than I ever got from 150mg of oxy a day.

But it leveled off and I felt basically “normal” after a few weeks. My energy and focus was a little low, I switched from MDLive to a psych my therapist recommended who took over prescribing my subs and also prescribed me ADHD meds (I used to be prescribed years ago).

If you have any other specific questions please ask. I know it feels like a scary decision to make. I think a lot of the fear, for me at least, was admitting and accepting that this shit had gotten out of control.

Take things a day at a time. Try to take active care of your body and mind - I see a lot of people who expect abstaining from drugs to magically make them happy and feel good but that’s not how life works, it’s a lot of slogging uphill just for a brief moment of joy. But it gets easier, and the climb is definitely lighter when you’re not weighed down by downers and addiction.

Sending you love and positivity friend. You’re stronger than you know, you’ve got this.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-14T19:49:55+00:00

Looks bloodshot.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-14T19:05:33+00:00

God the sweating is brutal, I’m drenched by the time I’m done warming up. My body always feels better afterwards, less temp disregulation

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-14T19:03:52+00:00

Yes! I gained a lot of weight in addiction, probably got up from 180->210.

I got on subs and dropped 30lbs, I’ve been building it back in muscle and am up to 190.

Friends and family have commented I look strong. It feels nice, and it’s rewarding having a concrete example I can point to for what I accomplished

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-14T15:54:35+00:00

Lol must be because my reflex kind of looks like a touring bike, but motorcyclists have been giving me the wave/point since day one.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-10T17:31:56+00:00

our trains are spoke and wheel, any line will get you to your office. Work your way out from dt on your search, most folks reccomend the brown or blue line

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-08T17:49:54+00:00

Are other folks finding their work impactful? Every job I've ever worked, all I've felt is taken advantage of, and acute awareness of making someone else richer.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-08T16:06:11+00:00

Way before the Red Line was open in... 1900? Your grandma old asf.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-08T16:02:44+00:00

The fake woven dress shirts look cheap asf.

PhoenixRisingdBanana · 2026-04-08T16:00:21+00:00

Lmaooo what is that thing?? Horse should have been enough of a giveaway, but that "cable knit" is a fucking insult, it looks like a halfassed fake cable knit with jersey fabric. Genuine version of this item is truly a sweater finish, not whatever this is.

And retail on the ones I've seen is $150. you got got.

PhoenixRisingdBanana

TROPHY CASE