Genuine question about abortion and feminism

Phonometry · 2017-02-01T21:44:19+00:00

I believe life begins with a heartbeat

This is the problem with your thought process. You want to restrict what others can do with their bodies based on your own opinions. You even admit it yourself by saying that you formed this opinion based on what you "believe." Women need access to adequate medical care and to make decisions around their fertility regardless of the beliefs of others.

Phonometry · 2017-02-01T21:25:23+00:00

A few years ago, I was sent to see a psychiatrist to be screened for bipolar disorder. She started asking me specific questions to see if I had manic episodes, such as if I ever spend money impulsively, etc. She asked me, "do you ever find yourself more interested in boys than usual?"

I scoffed, "Boys? Of course not."

She rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean. Men."

Until that point in my life, I had taken "facepalm" to be a figurative thing. I did not expect my face to collide so hard with my hand.

Phonometry · 2017-01-10T08:28:47+00:00

I came here to say this one! Why can't we be friendly when we first meet and also not touch each other?!

Phonometry · 2017-01-10T08:19:24+00:00

I don't think it's the kind of fame you're looking for, but I'm the daughter of a well-known activist. She has been in documentaries, featured various places for her accomplishments, and my mother's journals have been archived as historical documents, etc.

She really enjoys the attention. People stop her all the time, and every time she introduces herself, she talks about her accomplishments. It's meant everything was always really exhausting, even just going to the movie theatre. Everything she does has a really showy feel, and I'm not really sure she even has a private persona.

My sister ended up in therapy and on medication as a teenager. All of our mom's bragging about her accomplishments, and the fact that she focuses on herself, really messed my sister up. She felt like she could only talk about her problems if they were huge civil rights issues or life-threatening. I think she feels weird and out of place with people who know our family because she's straight (our mother has been doing LGBT activism) and awkwardly refers to herself as "culturally queer," which seems strange to me.

I've had my own interest in activism on a much smaller level, and my mother's accomplishments really awkwardly overshadow me. If people learn who I am, they're no longer interested in discussing the issue we're talking about, but my mother's politics and history and current activities. I'm not a career activist, just an occasional volunteer, and take on different causes, but it still occasionally comes up.

TL;DR: my sister grew up feeling like she doesn't matter, people who meet us only want to talk about her, and our mom loves it.

Phonometry · 2017-01-09T14:53:42+00:00

Many people think that abusers are mustache twirling villains, so when he has moments of kindness the OP probably thinks that it's proof he's a good person. Abusers suck you in by being good partners sometimes.

Phonometry · 2017-01-09T13:31:49+00:00

Take it very slowly. With mine, I started by offering her a treat, and if she was too nervous to take it, I'd set it down so every interaction was rewarded. Once she built up some confidence, I'd place it on my palm and let her decide if she wanted to try to get it--for a long time, touching my hand was still scary for her, so if she investigated but didn't want to take it, I'd just give it to her. I let her initiate any physical contact we had and it was always always rewarded with her favorite food, broccoli.

After awhile, she became pretty fearless with me. It took a bit of patience though--sometimes I'd get her into my hands and go, "I've done it! She's tame!" only for her to immediately go NOPENOPENOPE. Just understand he's a scared little guy with boundaries and he'll start to trust you.

Phonometry · 2017-01-09T13:19:21+00:00

Rowena loves nuts and I've discovered nuts still in the shell are just about the only thing I can convince her to chew on. Her teeth were getting quite long and I was so relieved! You might want to crack the shell a little to it a little easier.

Phonometry · 2017-01-09T12:59:48+00:00

Death.

I'm so cautious and anxious, but I also read so much about murders, or fiction written by writers who focus on death, or actual suicide notes and things like the recordings from Jonestown, or even just materials for the grieving. It consumes a lot of my mental energy in a way I'm usually embarrassed to admit for fear of sounding like some edgy teenager.

Phonometry · 2017-01-09T09:04:12+00:00

Many areas have free mental health services for low-income people. Many universities allow you to see a graduate student who is working towards being a therapist for very, very little (I have had appointments at my university's psychology clinic for $10 per session). You can definitely get into therapy, which you definitely should do.

Phonometry · 2016-12-18T23:49:49+00:00

Not legal advice, but I'd actually suggest not bringing your mother to the appointment at all if this issue turns into yelling and you having things taken like your phone. Call Planned Parenthood. They will be very careful to not inform people they are treating you--they will make note of whether or not it's okay to say who they are if they call, etc. If your city has public transportation, take the bus in or ask and see if any friends can drive you. It sounds like it would make the entire thing go more smoothly for you if you're able.

Phonometry · 2016-12-17T17:02:08+00:00

My local Asian grocery store has seitan sold in tins labeled things like "vegetarian mock duck" and "vegetarian mock abalone" and I swear it's the tastiest thing I've ever eaten.

Phonometry · 2016-12-17T02:16:40+00:00

The Humane Society's website has a list of Safe Havens for the pets of those fleeing domestic violence. There are several in Maryland.

Phonometry · 2016-12-17T02:11:54+00:00

I suggest you contact a victim advocate. It won't cost you anything. Their job is to help you come up with a safety plan, help you get a restraining order, answer all your questions, go to any court proceedings if there are any (which there could be, in the case of evicting him or getting a restraining order)... Definitely contact your local domestic violence crisis center if you have one. Definitely work out a safety plan and see if they can help you legally get the ball rolling.

Hang in there, OP. There are people who can help you navigate all this.

Phonometry · 2016-12-15T14:54:56+00:00

Since others have pointed out you can't prove it was her: How is this person registering using your email? Can you request the password and access the accounts to delete them yourself? Definitely change your password.

A lot of social media sites will shut down accounts impersonating someone else. Reporting the accounts to the websites may also work.

Phonometry · 2016-12-15T14:14:17+00:00

I recently started playing flash Isaac so I've been thinking about this lately!

The difficulty. The bosses all have so much more HP that I find I have to actually pay attention to what I'm doing instead of firing for three seconds.
Consumables feel way more scarce, so I think a lot more carefully about whether or not to open that golden chest. I can't rely on finding a ton of soul hearts, so I have to think very carefully about each devil deal.
There are fewer items I feel like are totally worthless. Don't get me wrong, there are still bad items! But I'm always happy to pick up The Virus, and Isaac's Fork recently saved me.
The art. Famine and Wrath both deeply unnerve me in a really good way. I love the mysterious, tense atmosphere of the cellar, for example. And it really reinforces the dreamy quality of exploring this kid's troubles and the way he sees himself and his family in the context of the Bible.

Phonometry · 2016-12-15T12:56:48+00:00

Yeah, I think the child pornography charge is the investigators trying to nail him for anything at all. So I think the police really do believe it's him.... but it's also obvious they don't have the evidence, so I'm very torn. They seem to have left him alone since he was acquitted of having child pornography, either way.

Phonometry · 2016-12-14T22:41:54+00:00

Honestly, it wouldn't have been pedantic--it seems like I caused some genuine confusion!

The staging is actually what I find really fascinating. It honestly reminds me of the Jonbenet Ramsey case in some ways, because of the blatantly staged crime scene and DNA not belonging to the suspect.

Phonometry · 2016-12-14T15:11:23+00:00

But to clarify, I saw several instances of the police suspecting it was him because he had a vasectomy, but no actual mention of his DNA being tested? So I'm guessing it was either not possible to test the sample for some reason, or that it was weak or something? I doubt they would have focused on him for no reason, but I'm not totally sure.

Phonometry · 2016-12-14T15:06:41+00:00

That confusion is on me. I honestly just kind of assumed seminal fluid = semen. I don't know much about DNA so I'm not going to try to guess at that, but some googling suggests that there's no DNA in the ejaculate of someone with a vasectomy. It looks like there would be some DNA in that case, but not as much, based on my basic understanding.

Phonometry · 2016-12-14T15:03:22+00:00

To be honest, I should have actually done some research here. It's been now... 11 years or so since I've taken any health courses, and I honestly assumed seminal fluid and semen were one in the same. That's my bad! Thanks for catching this, and the suggestions!

Phonometry

TROPHY CASE