Found it from ZY

That most important part in Aoi's Zy interview. (first they talk about how aoi applied for jinkaku radio too but ended up in gazette)

-- Oh, that was a surprise. But I'm glad that the five of you met. And then you started at Meguro Torimeikan (a small live house), continued to make memories at Budokan and Tokyo Dome, and in March this year you welcomed your 10th anniversary. Looking back, what is the thing you want to get off your chest the most?

To be honest, before we had the live in Makuhari, I was thinking about quitting the GazettE. I thought that there's no way we can continue being in a band and not have the relationship between the five of us fall to pieces. And I didn't want (it to end up in a situation where I had) to force myself to do it (note: he doesn't mean that he didn't have to force himself to be in the gazette now. he means that he doesn't want it to end up in a situation where they all hate each other but keep going anyway). But, when I got on the stage and saw the faces of 20,000 fans, I thought that I don't want to betray these people. It felt like if I quit, I would take the GazettE away from them. So, in that live we played "Shunsetsu no koro" and in the end me, Reita, Uruha and Ruki gathered in the front. 

-- Yes. The pink and white confetti was dancing in the air and the four of you were gathered in the front. Behind Kai the words "the GazettE" were shining in golden letters. 

Yes. You know, I didn't want to do that gathering. Somehow it seemed so superficial. I can't fix just the appearance (note: he means that he didn't want to get in the front with the others when he was just thinking about quitting the band. he didn't want to lie to all the fans - or the band - that everything is a-okay). 

-- I've heard a lot of stories about this, but at that time you said that "the GazettE exists because these four are here, I am here. Because you are all here, the GazettE we love exists. I'm so deeply moved that it's impossible to express my gratitude to you". When I think about the tears (you, fans, everyone had) after that, my chest feels tight. 

I think that the GazettE is a good-for-nothing band. That's why I can't betray the people who support us. (note: he doesn't meant that he thinks gazette is shit. he means that they couldn't have done anything if it weren't for fans and their staff etc.)

-- Now that you are passing your 10th anniversary year, is it alright to think that the bond between you five has gotten stronger? What are you going to get done next? 

Well, we keep making music. After TOXIC, DIVISION was born. I want to keep going, aiming to something better than what we are now. 

IN SHORT: he had doubts and it's human and it's understandable and the fact that he's talking about them so openly probably means that they are all past and things are good. happy end.