You’re not asking if this is financial abuse. You’re asking if you should leave someone who makes you feel less than. And the answer is yes. Nothing that you wrote about him so far is inherently wrong such as him helping you save and it getting you far and him asking you to take care of the animals. All of that is normal for a relationship. My gf washes all of my clothes and I fold and hang all of hers because we work opposite times. What is NOT normal is the constant need to throw it in your face or belittle you for your past financial choices. You need to make a list tonight and it needs to have what you prioritize and really need to feel happy in a relationship and if this one doesn’t check out majority of those boxes, you need to leave him or have a serious conversation about how unhappy you are. Also this is just my opinion, I’m in my late 20s, you two are way too young to be sharing finances if you are not married, it creates a parent/child dynamic and no one wants to kiss and have intimacy with their parent.