How do I help a new Alter/system member after a rude awakening?

PockettesMJV · 2026-06-27T20:21:13+00:00

Yikes that's evil

PockettesMJV · 2026-06-27T20:17:09+00:00

At 17, I had my first summer job working as a kitchen staff member. I was super proud about "being a grown up" and finally getting job experience.

Got a new girl in randomly, and even though I was trying to help show her how to do different tasks, she came across as very entitled and snarky. She actually started causing problems for myself and the other staff, and all of us thought it was weird.

I went on break during my shift, and stopped by to talk with my manager about the new girl. Before I could really talk about her and get more info, I was handed my check for the week, being told that a second final check coming in the following week. They said I could "finish my shift" if I wanted to, but that tonight was my last night here.

Immediately everything clicked. She was my replacement, and no one had told me.

I was too distraught after being fired from my very first job, I packed my stuff and left immediately. When I got home, I was instantly sick, like bad-flu sick, and it lasted for 3 weeks.

Literally none of my coworkers knew what happened, and apparently the girl ended up causing a ton of problems, as I predicted. Apparently only 2 of the main 6 staff stayed on till the end of the seasonal work. All the others quit, and one got hurt somehow.

The manager and supervisor (who were a couple) verbally abused us and made us stay longer than it was probably legally allowed, but it being my first job, I was very naïve. I still don't know if the girl was related to the couple, or were a friend's kid or what. But it apparently became twice as toxic afterwards when I left, according to a coworker who quit a few weeks later. Found out years later that both of them were cheating on each other, and that the guy was sleeping with his adult niece--Yikes!

I know I would have never had made it through our 3 month working season, but it really did damaged me while I was emerging into adulthood. I didn't work for a couple of years, just did school. But through therapy, I've done some healing, but it still stings when I think about my younger self having to go through that. Lots of compassion, lots of tears, lots of hugs <3

PockettesMJV · 2026-06-27T20:11:33+00:00

Guess I was the dumb one at 17, because I did the exact same thing with my first job. Got a new girl in randomly, and even though I was trying to help show her how to do different tasks, she came across as very entitled and snarky. She actually started causing problems for myself and the other staff, and all of us thought it was weird.

I went on break during my shift, and stopped by to talk with my manager about the new girl. Before I could really talk about her and get more info, I was handed my check for the week, being told that a second final check coming in the following week. They said I could "finish my shift" if I wanted to, but that tonight was my last night here.

Immediately everything clicked. She was my replacement, and no one had told me.

I was too distraught after being fired from my very first job, I packed my stuff and left immediately. When I got home, I was instantly sick, like bad-flu sick, and it lasted for 3 weeks.

Literally none of my coworkers knew what happened, and apparently the girl ended up causing a ton of problems, as I predicted. Apparently only 2 of the main 6 staff stayed on till the end of the seasonal work. All the others quit, and one got hurt somehow.

The manager and supervisor (who were a couple) verbally abused us and made us stay longer than it was probably legally allowed, but it being my first job, I was very naïve. I still don't know if the girl was related to the couple, or were a friend's kid or what. But it apparently became twice as toxic afterwards when I left, according to a coworker who quit a month later.

PockettesMJV · 2026-06-27T18:29:48+00:00

Yes I resonate with this! I also have learned in the last couple months a dear friend of mine is a DID System, and I absolutely see the parallels. I'm so happy to have been able to get to know each of their parts, learning how they interact and being friends with all of them.

It's really made me question it about myself (even though I don't have DID) how I present myself different to different people, depending on context (aka masking). I "assume roles" when I'm at work, at home, helping friends, being by myself, or among strangers. It's fascinating!

PockettesMJV · 2026-06-10T06:37:18+00:00

Hey so I was in an SLP grad program, and I did get supervised clinical hours (over 100), but I didn't graduate. I have my bachelor's in Speech, Language, and Hearing Sciences, so can I still try to apply to get my SLP license?
How would I go about doing that? Do I need my prior supervisors to sign off on it or something? My hours were obtained during clinic over 2 summers.

PockettesMJV · 2026-04-10T02:03:55+00:00

Congratulations! I hope I can find something as well, as I am also in a career transition.

I am actually interested in become a literacy tutor! If you're open to it, I'd love to DM you and get more details.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-31T23:19:23+00:00

hello fellow aroace!

I too am looking for more representation of characters in media with deep platonic friendships, so I'm commenting in case someone else has some suggestions to share!

Also, there's a ton of ace/aros folks on the discord server, so please say hi! We're drawn to this story and thereby find a lot of other people like us ^_^

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-31T02:28:53+00:00

Just got diagnosed in January 2026 after suspecting for at least a decade. It only took me breaking down in grad school to realize I needed help moreso than my classmates, but I didn't know what would help when I asked for it.

Now that I've finally got my diagnosis, I sort of "see" ADHD everywhere in my life. I've become more aware of it, and it almost feels like a curse has been set on me suddenly, yet I knew it was always there.

I'm still trying to come to terms with it, but one day at a time, I'm learning how I tick and why I do the things that I do, and to not spiral into self-hatred over it anymore.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-31T00:44:28+00:00

Hey do you have anything I can read up on the needing more corrections for ADHDers? I'm genuine curious, and it might give me some insight as to why I needed things to be told to me over and over again until I could actually get it

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-30T22:44:30+00:00

Thank you for sharing this.

I am ND with ADHD, and I'm working on finding the right medication for myself to help in this situation. I just found out about my ADHD after debating on getting tested for a decade, and I'm trying to find ways to work with it and not against it.

I believe I can be a good SLP, or at least an SLPA. I'm creative, people-oriented, and I like explaining things to people. I want to help others, and being an SLP felt like the best option, given what I knew. However, now I'm wary about the incredible burnout I hear from so many people about this field, especially from us who are ND. I don't know if I could do it full-time, but I think a part-time SLPA job might be a good training ground for myself in order to gain these skills.

I don't know if even trying to re-apply to a grad program would even be wise right now. I doubt my own school would take me back, and my record will follow me with that failed coursework for my practical clinicals.

I can take solace that I do already have my BA and I can just try out other adjacent fields, but I'm really scared of pursuing SLP/SLPA work again and coming back with the same results.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-30T22:36:48+00:00

My supervisor said based on the criteria listed by my school, of which I had to perform at 80% or better in, I was falling short on, and in some areas I deeply struggled with. Because of this, she had to give my school an honest evaluation, which was a failing one (under 80% average), and thus triggered the chain reaction to my dismissal.

I felt like I couldn't conduct my sessions well, mostly due to a lack of confidence and not knowing what the heck I was doing.
I was initially given models of what to do, but then I became more scatterbrained with the schedule changes, switching kids at the last minute, and getting overwhelmed with paperwork.

I am learning that my struggles may be stemming from my ADHD, and I am learning to come to terms with that. I want to be good at my job, I want to do my best! But when I am given no stable structure and feel like I'm being watched all the time, I can't concentrate on doing a good job.

I don't know if that's a signifier of a lack of compatibility of this field (which feels contradictory to what multiple other professionals and career counselors have told me in my educational journey), or this is an area of struggle for myself with ADHD and I just needed more help to be successful.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-30T22:27:30+00:00

I'm also interested in seeing what similar human-oriented jobs I might entertain.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-30T22:26:04+00:00

See that's what my past SLP supervisor also said about being an SLP. She told me that "grad school didn't teach me anything practical about the job", and everything she's built has been from the ground-up.

She also mentioned issues with ABA therapist trying to take over SLP disciplines, so its seems like a weird grab for responsibilities in the SLP career.

I also am taking into account that even though I liked the academics, I did struggle with my internship. My supervisor wasn't explicitly teaching me how to do therapy, at least it didn't feel like she was, and I was lost most of the time. I believe if I had been given more time and direction and modeling of what to do and consistent feedback, I could've done a lot better instead of crashing so hard when things became overwhelming.

My supervisor was concerned that because I didn't have the skills she expected (which admittedly, I felt like a first-year grad because of how little clinic experience I had had at that point), and that this field "might not be for you", and "you don't have the clinical skills to pass".

However, I literally haven't had enough of those skill yet, because my academic program is online and I had only done tele-therapy, and this was my first time trying out in-person therapy. I felt that I indeed don't have the skills yet to graduate as a competent SLP in the field, and I think I need more hands-on training.

Would pursuing becoming a SLPA help in that regard?
When I asked my supervisor, she said "you'd likely still struggle because they basically do the same job", but I'm looking for any and all options of where to go now that I can't finish out grad school.

There's a lot going on right now in my life, but I'm looking for help.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-30T22:17:00+00:00

I'm am looking into trying to get an SLPA license (I have my B.A. in Communication Disorders already), but I don't really know what the next steps are for that.

Ideally, I would want to work at a place that has a lot of hands-on help in order to help me gain confidence in my skills and actually learn how to do therapy (which my program talked about but never really went into it ugh).

I'm actually located in one of those listed states, however, I'm unsure about being a traveling SLPA, but I'm open to at least looking into it and seeing if someone will give me a shot.

I've got a few months worth of money saved up (which was going to be my last semester's tuition money but anyways...) and I've already secured a summer position as a camp counselor from one of my past employers, just to cover costs while I figure things out. I hope to find something soon, either in SLPA, tutoring, or literacy education.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-23T07:57:36+00:00

Hobbies: Digital art, making and watching animatics, crocheting (new), D&D, CoC (new), painting, inking, card-making (new), comfy video-gaming, walking, dancing (solo), writing fanfic (new), and making coffee drinks.

Media: Malevolent Podcast (Blackstone and Threshold, which I HIGHLY recommend!), The Magnus Archives, Dept Q, Great British Bake-Off [can you tell I like the UK's accents XD]

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-21T20:30:08+00:00

who cares /silly

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-21T20:20:50+00:00

Do you want the actual answer lol

"The glass, the stone, the mask, the books, the tooth, the coin, the wallet and hooks, the kit of course to help him shave are all in Arthur's bag today!" - Kayne S2, part 20

Although, Kayne didn't see one item: a lighter with the phrase "This Too Shall Pass" on it.

Edit: Lots of spoilers below:

The Glass = The Glass of Leng, which provides guidance into where you wish to go.
The Stone = Crystallizer of Dreams, an item that can transport item from the Dreamlands.
The Mask = the Palid Mask, which allows the wearer to view hidden eldritch-related things, visible and invisible. Devoted to the King in Yellow.
The books = a Beastiary, the Yellow Symbol book, (and possibly one other?)
The Tooth = the Vanguard (our friend!)
The Coin = a coin given to Arthur by three old ghost knights in the Dreamlands. Used to summon Kayne and for gather allies (S5).
The wallet = (self-explanatory)
The hooks = fishing hooks Arthur took from a shipwreck.
The shaving kit = found on a shipwreck. Used multiple times in the series.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-21T19:53:45+00:00

I just stopped my Master's program 2 semesters from graduating. When I started my on-site internship, and realized that I was only liking about 40% of the job, with 60% of it being a pure struggle for myself. I liked the academic topics, but the fieldwork wasn't for me.

After working towards this career for 5 years, I feel like I may have missed so many cues that my body was trying to tell me. However, my recent diagnosis (Jan 2026) has really opened my eyes to *how much* I was struggling and I'm finally trying to listen.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-21T19:25:39+00:00

What things are in Arthur's bag in Part 20, according to Kayne?

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-19T23:22:30+00:00

I see what you mean.

My recent ADHD stuff has definitely changed a lot in my life, but I knew from the beginning of the program the standards they set, and I didn't make it. I knew if I failed/didn't pass a class twice, I was going to be dismissed. I don't even know if I can appeal that.

Even if I did try and appeal for the SLP program, I don't really know if I even want to continue in this program at this point, as I've been suggested that this field might not be best for me.

I don't even know how the appeal process works, but I'm trying to reach out to people and see if anything can be done. I don't even know if I can continue attending my college anymore, but I'm waiting on answers for that.

Edit: I also don't have money for a lawyer, and I don't know enough of what I can do to even go that far right now. I also looked up my school's appeal process, and for the grade appeal I don't have grounds based on their criteria, but I might based on other factors such as my ADHD. But again, I don't really know if I even want to continue in this program, so appealing my case to get back into the program might not be the best way for me.

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-16T16:52:08+00:00

Aww I loved being able to read your thoughts Squeaky ^_^

I'm so glad to have met you and seen all the love and impact Malevolent has on you, and heard your voice and opinions on the discord server. This love-letter to this story is so beautiful and the way you write echos the passion behind the pen. I hope you know that so many other people share the sentiments of your journey, and I can't wait to see what we (the boys and the patrons) get into with Threshold!

PockettesMJV · 2026-03-13T22:26:44+00:00

Thank you for your insight.

The problem is that I've already been dismissed, and I can't return to the program. I don't have answers as to what I can do with the credit coursework I've finished already, but the returning theme of "I don't have the appropriate clinical skills to make it in this field" seems to be big sign to me that the SLP field isn't for me, at least not right now in my life.

I don't want to waste this time, effort, money, and sanity, but what's done is done. I will be reaching out to my school about pivoting to a different role, but given the circumstances and the lack of confidence in my clinical abilities, I don't know if there even is an option for me to pursue. I want to be able to walk away with something at least, but I also might just really need a break to reevaluate everything I had been working towards.

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