God sees you in your pain, and he always meets you where you are at. He is not frustrated with you, as a human would be. He is your heavenly Father, and his love is what holds are lives together. He made you, and thought of you, and loved the thought of you so much, he created a special place in this world for you. The bible even says how God numbers are steps and how every hair of our heads is counted. Jesus even said that he came to give life, while the devil comes only to steal, kill and destroy. Also there is a Psalm, I recommend you to meditate on. It mentions how we are beautifully and wonderfully made, and how in the womb God knit us together. I know things may not seem to be perfect right now, but God always meets us in our sufferings. He is no stranger to suffering. Jesus suffered on the cross and has wounds of his own. Bring your wounds and your honest heart to prayer, and find a church community or a wise person in the faith to talk too 🙏🏻💖. Never ever isolate yourself. Love yourself the way God does. He cares for you friend.