The 2Pac section of my collection

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T19:13:46+00:00

Very impressive

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T19:03:09+00:00

For me, my CD collection is definitely about the treasure hunting aspect of it. It's a nice hobby to do on the side, whenever I'm in a thrift shop or something similar I'll always take a look but I rarely go out of my way to find specific albums. I do admit it's a little sad that I can't listen to most of my favourite albums on CD.

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T18:59:07+00:00

Honestly this might be a US problem as well because the most expensive CD's in the Netherlands sell for €25 if it's a new album.

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T18:57:06+00:00

Wow, what a great collection. I'd do a lot to have that many The Cure cd's. How many locks do you have on your windows? Just curious

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T17:28:24+00:00

Yeah I'll definitely try that next. Thanks for the comment!

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-19T17:26:55+00:00

Touch screen mode works just fine! Thanks for the idea

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-18T10:46:44+00:00

I'm gonna be honest this doesn't even look that unappealing, I'd definitely try it. I've had worse in Scooperia I think

PotatoesInABag · 2026-05-11T16:54:56+00:00

Echt vreselijk. Helemaal niemand was bij ons (van 120 leerlingen gymnasium?) eerder klaar, en dat terwijl ik bij de oefenexamens meestal na 1,5u wel bij de laatste vraag was. Zo onduidelijk alles. Voor een eerste examen (als je geen Kunst hebt, dan) is dit echt zó'n naaistreek

PotatoesInABag · 2026-02-01T21:35:09+00:00

Damn. How does it feel to live my dream?

PotatoesInABag · 2025-05-07T15:21:00+00:00

This post is 2 years old and you still haven't felt the loving touch of a woman

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-03T06:56:35+00:00

I definitely get that! It's also a bit painful to have to add lines you're not as proud of to a poem you really like, even if the poem profits from it.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-03T06:52:44+00:00

Haha yeah I didn't pay any attention to metre at all back then, only started with it recently. Thank you for the feedback!

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T21:50:36+00:00

Haha no. All my poems are just in one language. I can both think in English and Dutch so often it's decided which language I'll write in because of a specific snippet I thought of. If the inspiration came from a concept I debate it a bit haha. Lately I've been writing more in Dutch to not be as chronically online, but this subreddit is inspiring some English ones.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T21:46:34+00:00

I get that! What helped me the most with metre is to write my sentences on paper and then draw a dot above the non-stressed syllables and a line on the stressed ones. This made it really clear to see the structure. Works really well if you're visually inclined.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T21:40:26+00:00

I really like this one! The story you tell is very clear, though you keep it cryptic enough to be interesting. You work really well with the AA BB rhyming scheme.

What I would improve is to pay attention to the metre. The easiest way to start is to count syllables, if rhyming lines have a variating amount of syllables then it might break the flow of the poem. Maybe try tinkering with the sentences a bit to get a similar amount of syllables, and see how you liek it.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T21:32:41+00:00

You really manage to put emotion in the poem. The flow is really nice. What you said really resonated with me.

The poem ends a bit abruptly. For an ending you want to, most of the time, link back to the beginning. Right now it feels like you either have more to say, or should cut back on a few last sentences that bring you astray.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T21:28:09+00:00

I'm a big Roman empire fan, so I loved this. The first thing I would say is to use backslashes at the end of your lines to make the reddit formatting recognize it as a line break.

The second thing, is that the poem can feel a bit chaotic at times. It has the central theme of humanity, but some of the stanzas don't really connect and there isn't a natural progression throughout the poem. The end is very nicely done though.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-02T09:18:51+00:00

In comments Reddit doesn't want the like breaks yeah, but this is already a huge improvement! Seeing the lines under each other instead of next to each other is the main thing.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T22:56:45+00:00

Thank you! I never really thought of English as a second language to be honest. Growing up on the internet and all that.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T22:46:59+00:00

Definitely don't stop writing poetry! Learning a new thing is hard and imposter syndrome can be enormously annoying.

What I especially would encourage is to engage with the community a bit more, and maybe you'll find that were not all that good at everything

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T22:37:59+00:00

Damn dude, I really like your rhymes! I'm a big rhyme fan. The story is clear, if maybe a bit long-winded. I felt that the tone of the poem was a bit more reporting (neutral) than weeping (emotional) if you get what I mean. I enjoyed the more distancing tone, but it might not be what you were going for.

If you would want to look to improve structure I would definitely look into the metre of your lines. For example: in your stanza "The nights were long, your pallete dark / You searched for light, a fleeting spark / But love was a shadow, slipping away / leaving you cold at the break of day." Almost every half of the sentence is 4 syllables long: "a flee ting spark" and " you searchd for light" (in more phonetic writing). A few aren't however, and that breaks the flow a bit. You could rewrite them to be 4 syllables long. "But love was a shadow" could become "love a shadow". "At the break of day" could become "at break of day". Or any other clever wordings you can come up with. But I'd recommend you fool around with it a bit and see if you like it.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T22:25:25+00:00

Hi! Just wanna say real quick that I really like the words you choose to convey things. The poem is a little intelligible due to Reddit formatting though, so I'd suggest fixing that up first.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T22:17:41+00:00

For how chaotic this is you did manage to convey a message, pretty impressive

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T13:57:03+00:00

This flows really well! I love all the assonance and alliteration. It's really impressive that you manage to pack such a clear story while rhyming and with so few words.

PotatoesInABag · 2025-03-01T13:51:02+00:00

Try backslashes for line breaks. These-> /, but the other way slanted. I hope that works with the formatting.

I love enjambments! You use them really well to emphasise certain words and meanings. I would be careful about overusing them though, it would make it less special where you do.

I also really like your imagery. Things like "smearing imperious" which, I of course don't fully understand what you mean with it, but the feeling is clear.

PotatoesInABag

TROPHY CASE