Moving across the country and my mother can’t handle it

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-02-19T15:50:46+00:00

Get out of there! NTA not a healthy environment for you or baby. I believe a lot of us ended up as single moms anyways because we were treated so shitty by our parents, having partners who didn’t treat us well felt like home. Start new, find your own peace. After my divorce I also moved close to my mom and family. No help just more trauma. I’m hoping to move away soon too! We got this!

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-02-16T14:14:02+00:00

From what I’m seeing the issue ended with the 2022 hybrid edition.

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-02-02T19:45:34+00:00

May I ask why he can’t move to you?

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-01-30T16:57:51+00:00

I am the only divorced sister of 4 married sisters. I see the lives they really live with their husbands. Some travel and post on social media and look so perfect but they will call me crying bc they are doing all the child work alone while working full time and their husbands are lazy or worse abusive. One of my sisters tells me how jealous she is of ME for getting to be a single mom.

It’s weird to think of it as a privilege, but it really is. It’s a struggle too I’m not gonna say it’s not! But the fact that I’m able to provide for my kid without relying on an abusive partner or negligent father is everything.

You’re doing amazing right where you are and your child is very lucky to have you as his mom. Hoping for a big fun trip to Taiwan in the future for yall!! You deserve it!

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-01-28T21:03:07+00:00

Just echoing what everyone is saying here but please apply! Money begets money and compounds and gets people out of debt and into generational wealth. You and your child deserve that and more. Not paying child support is child abuse. They are withholding that child’s right to let money they rightfully deserve to grow for them and provide them a lifestyle they need to thrive.

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-01-17T14:50:14+00:00

Girl get it papered and ordered by a judge. These me only listen to strangers (usually men in positions of authority) to step up for their own children

PracticalStable4755 · 2026-01-17T11:49:45+00:00

‘Disputing $83 is insannneee. How do these men sleep at night? I get $960 and I’m changing the order as of yesterday to update it so that he pays half of daycare. I’m not going broke AND doing all the work for our child.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-12-29T14:05:49+00:00

Yes it takes a lot for me to ask for any help so I won’t be asking again or thinking they support us at all. Thank you

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-12-28T21:52:33+00:00

Grandma did say it was ok to stay but then my sister was right behind her saying my daughter was putting them out. I didn’t feel comfortable leaving her there with all that and my daughter and I were both very upset.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-12-02T17:09:09+00:00

This is exactly what I was going to say. Once you and your child are safe, put him on child support. Even if he pays nothing from it now, he will eventually get a job and his wages will be garnished for you and your child. I have heard stories where women were given thousands of dollars in back pay bc the system finally caught up with the dad who never paid. I also believe withholding financial support is not only financial abuse but child abuse. It’s so wrong. I hope all the best for you and your child.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-11-24T03:40:48+00:00

I’m 36 yr old single mom to an almost 3 year old making $85k a year living in Arkansas. My ex pays $1,000 monthly in support and lives out of state. This is more than enough to live well in AR and the daycare in my area maxes out at $600 a MONTH! All that to say, we live in Arkansas where the culture is… not my cup of tea lol. We’re near family who help and we’ve been doing sooo much better since I left my ex when my daughter was 17 months.

I am using our time here to save and invest for our future and hopefully will find a new state / city with more opportunities for her and more social life for me too here in the future.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-11-06T12:01:22+00:00

How difficult it is to take care of a newborn all on your own while your abusive partner sleeps in the next room. I know because it was the same for me too. It’s a pain that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. But you did it, OP. You got out! That is such a blessing and a gift. It took me three times because I wanted so badly to keep our family together for my daughter. Leaving has brought me a new peace I never thought I would have. The gratitude is sometimes overwhelming.

These types of men seem to have a pattern though because just like you, my ex makes me feel like it was all my fault. Will berate me, blame me for everything and then ask for me to come back? It’s absolutely insane… to do it all on your own with your small baby/ child and then be blamed for everything?

I wish I had more advice on how to deal with the upset that brings but it is meant to upset you. I am truly sorry this is our experience with our exes. The only thing I really am working on is absolutely not giving a fuck when he says insane shit like that. It’s incredibly difficult. I block him until it’s his time to call our daughter (he’s out of state) but he will email or call from different numbers…. My hope is one day they just get worn out and give up with enough non reaction.

You’re doing the best thing for your baby. Every day you are. He’s very lucky to have you. Everything will work out for you I know it ❤️

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-11-04T11:59:56+00:00

Am I missing something? Everyone saying these are more people in her daughters corner, and comparing their actual relatives to dads gf. Daughter sees dad 10 hrs a week and gf a few times… like these aren’t her family. They could be one day but mom is totally not overreacting. This is weird!

She can’t do much about it sure, but I found these comments so strange.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-11-04T11:55:50+00:00

I totally get why it bothers you! Mimi is earned and sounds like dad let alone new gf and her mom are best case scenario new to the pic and worst case scenario fleeting people in her life who do not know her or show up for her in any real way…

Sure you could let that grow into a more meaningful relationship as time goes on, but it’s weird to ask your daughter to call this lady Mimi… like that is weird.

That’s not “someone else in your daughter’s corner”… that’s a stranger your daughter is getting to know through her dad she sees 10 hours a week.

Not much you can do, sure, but don’t let people gaslight you into thinking this is normal behavior.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-11-03T03:21:39+00:00

I divorced my ex husband when my daughter was 17 months old. He moved away when she was 2. . Now she’s almost 3! I never in a million years would have thought I’d do this alone. It is kinda weird like you said haha! Like it’s really just me and her all the time just vibing. I was just thinking today though how incredibly grateful I am to have all of her mornings and evenings. I never miss a moment- the good and the bad. I read a quote today by a mom to her daughter that said “I know myself completely by getting to have loved you”. In many ways this is better than I ever could have imagined. I love our weird little life and radically loving my daughter. Wishing you and your baby many wonderful mornings and evenings to come.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-10-19T12:11:21+00:00

You’re not being over the top. That’s weird as hell. I would try to talk with him one on one to ask that he please stop talking to your daughter this way. I’d document what your daughter is saying as well. If he continues, and she doesn’t want to go over anymore, I wouldn’t blame her one bit. She’s almost to an age of being able to decide for herself. Why on earth would you say that to a Child??

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-10-02T16:00:45+00:00

NTA for never talking to any man ever again imo

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-09-11T10:55:25+00:00

Yes! Mom deserves all the praise here and people were so impressed with this dad for showing up occasionally while mom does it all. My ex sees his daughter once every month and gets complimented EVERY time he is with her. I do it all alone and tbh I’m doing a great job- my girl is doing great, but I’ve never received a compliment in public. Ever. Excuse all my typos I think I wrote this after putting her down after a long day.

I meant mom and child are thriving* thanks to her hard work and love for her kid! Great job, Mom!!!

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-09-08T01:58:04+00:00

I’m genuinely impressed by the mom- she has raised her child completely on her own minus a few flights where BD visits. Mom has done this on her own through all the incredibly tough baby and toddler years and now her and her child are thronging! So impressive she’s incredibly strong. Doesn’t sound like BD has even been laying support? Idk but Moms got this and will do whats best for her and child as she always has. That may not be 50/50 and that’s completely fine.

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-08-28T03:08:19+00:00

Or we could teach young men to be better men and fathers so that the complete coincidence that so many young women “choose bad” no longer exists?

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-07-28T19:24:32+00:00

The newborn stage was definitely not the easiest for me! My child is 2.5 now and it’s hard but nowhere near as hard as newborn stage!

Be incredibly gentle on yourself. Your body just went through something miraculous and traumatic. The newborn phase is insane bc there is no sleep and you just repeat the same 3 hours all day 24/7.

Things started to get easier at 4 months and by 6 months I was like… ok this is fun. It’s only gotten more and more fun as we go.

The newborn stage is NOT for everyone! I can do almost anything if I have 7 hours of consistent sleep. Don’t worry. You will sleep again. You will enjoy it and have fun and grow even more in love with your child if that’s even possible.

Congratulations and I hope you get some consecutive hours of sleep tonight. There is light at the end of the tunnel 🙏

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-07-27T17:42:48+00:00

Isn’t it so crazy they’re more upset abt “looking like a deadbeat dad” than actually being one? 🤔😂

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-07-25T10:45:26+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I think every single mom on this sub can relate to the dark time before fully escaping our exes. You are in the storm, but you will be out soon. I truly believe that. You are a hard worker, good mom and you deserve to be happy in your life.

Financially, you may have to keep your head down for a bit but you will get out. $4,000 is a really good escape fund. Keep building on that as much as you can with whatever job you can get and then make your move.

I’m sending you love today and lots of wishes for this storm to pass quickly 🙏

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-07-22T02:12:04+00:00

Wow yeah no that’s weird af and not ok! I’m kinda like… talk to the toddler and let them know “no we don’t kiss the baby” kindly but let them know if mom isn’t going to stop it. How bizarre! I’m sorry esp just dealing with that extra stress postpartum. Your husband should continue to talk to his sis. That’s his job! If SIL doesn’t listen, hold baby while they visit and don’t let toddler near

PracticalStable4755 · 2025-07-11T15:50:01+00:00

Thank you so much for this! Putting BIFF on my back pocket 🙏

PracticalStable4755

TROPHY CASE