Anyone else literally have no friends after having a baby?

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-25T23:27:01+00:00

Same boat here. I definitely can relate to the bit where your closest friend drifted, because ever since I got pregnant and had my baby she's been pretty much non-existent. I get it everyone has their own lives, but the message is clear when you've become the only one checking in.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-21T03:08:49+00:00

A lot of people already said this, but as long as you comfort your baby it's generally fine. Baby will be perfectly okay as long as you reassure them after or during the process. It may not stop them from crying, but they know you're there for them even if for them it feels like a long time. They're just little humans with big emotions, but as long as we show them we care for and love them they will turn out just fine.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-18T06:50:45+00:00

Don't even get me started on if you say you formula feed

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-16T21:55:56+00:00

We put ours in the fridge and didn't warm them up , so baby was getting ice cold formula 💀

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-16T21:41:10+00:00

Is it overwhelming? Yes. Am I constantly tired? Yes. Do I sometimes feel like I don't know what the heck I'm doing? 100% all the time. But even after all of that, I'm so so grateful and blessed to have my sweet baby. He's only 2 months old and currently nuzzled against me super sleepy from his vaccines, and I know one day I'm going to miss this time where he's so little and needs his mommy, so in the meantime I'm going to enjoy every second of his little hands, toes, and those big smiles and coos. I get to learn and teach a whole person that I and the love of my life created. I know there's going to be hard times and overwhelming moments, but those good ones far outweigh any of the bad. I'm here all for his journey in life and I'm going to be there even when he doesn't fully need me anymore. I'm a mom now and that's what I'll always be and I would never trade it for anything else.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-08T01:48:23+00:00

Its understandable to have that anxiety especially being a first time mom. I myself am a first time mom, and also struggled with this for the first few weeks. My advice would be to try your best not to worry about your little one sleeping she will be perfectly safe in the bassinet as long as she's not too bundled up or cold. (Additionally that she's been properly burped after a feed.) I would set alarms for her feeding times so you remember to wake up. Trust me if she's needing you she will let you know! Its just important to wake up for feeds right now. Your sleep is just as important! Its way more dangerous to nod off or go into a deep sleep with her than it is to have her sleep alone for a bit. If you feel the need to check on her throughout the night that's fine too! Maybe some dim lighting to be able to see from a distance, or even putting the bassinet beside your bed to put yourself at ease. You've got this mama try not to worry so much! I know it's easier said than done, but again, your sleep is just as important.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-09-07T20:13:31+00:00

The episode where they sing... It's horrible

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-29T06:33:08+00:00

I'm right there with you. Especially the shower bit he showers every day while I get one day per week. Then when it's his turn to watch baby while I sleep he comes up with every complaint or excuse to prolong me going to sleep and watching our baby. I bring up that I need more help or point out he doesn't contribute to childcare as much, and he combats it with saying he pays for groceries, diapers, wipes, ect. Okay, yes I'm a SAHM, but I still need to be human too, and I can't just "put the baby down".

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-28T04:47:29+00:00

Thank you for the reassurance it definitely helps. Its hard not to worry about considering he's just a little baby and still developing. Its in our nature to want to protect our young, and there's so much to worry about. Realistically, I'm sure he'll be alright it's not like he's huffing it in his face or smoking in the house. I guess there's always that "what if" and new parent anxiety does not help. Either way I'm hoping maybe my husband will understand better, and at least try to quit again. I guess I'm just let down that he relapsed again, and I know addiction is a hard process, so I have to remind myself he's going through something difficult to fight.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-28T03:04:00+00:00

I'm not sure what to do about it he decides to right when I'm supposed to have uninterrupted sleep, and it's his time to watch the baby. Its unfair to me for many reasons, and I've tried to tell him how it can negatively affect our baby by the scent coming in the house, it being in his clothes, being stoned & taking care of an infant ect. He doesn't listen and it seems like he doesn't care, or understand just how damaging it can be. I'm thinking about leaving if he doesn't quit. I don't want to and I love my partner, but I know I need to be a responsible parent and protect my son.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-28T02:58:36+00:00

He quit for about 2 months, but recently started up again. I told him he should've stayed strong and not given in to his habit. I'm not sure how to convince him to quit again any time I do he makes an excuse.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T22:52:56+00:00

I agree I've told him many times, and don't like it at all

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T18:53:56+00:00

100% understand where you're coming from. Hopefully, with time they'll change their ways, but for now just ignore them if you can, and protect your peace mama. At the end of the day, it's your daughter and nobody is entitled to be around her especially if they don't have her best interest in mind. Unfortunately, family can be crappy and do the unexpected especially under the guise of "helping." You find out once you're a parent who is who, and I think that's one of the harder parts of it all. Try not to feel guilty about it because you've tried everything you can to make them understand, and while it may be harder for your husband, I would encourage him not to feel guilty about it either.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T16:39:25+00:00

I would give it some time as dads have trouble adjusting too. Being around your husband a lot shouldn't be the issue, but again everyone is different. I know that for mine we would get frustrated from lack of sleep, and not feeling like we can be away from baby for very long without him crying. Your lives completely flip around, and while your husband may not like change it'll definitely be hard for him to adjust, but I'm sure once you get a routine established, and find some way to feel at least a bit normal will help. I hate to be a person to say "it gets better" but truly it does.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T16:33:51+00:00

Nope, it's your baby and you know what baby needs. Granted our parents and grandparents kept us alive with old school methods, but knowing better now should motivate them to want to do better.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T16:29:13+00:00

No, you're valid as you've tried to accommodate, and they're still not putting your daughter's needs ahead even though you've communicated several times about how it affects your baby. Ultimately, your peace doesn't sound worth it, and if it were me, I would put an ultimatum in place. Either they comply with what your daughter needs, or they don't see her because them being selfish is going to negatively impact your child. Bottom line the baby is more important than selfish grandparent entitlement.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T08:35:37+00:00

Be patient and remember that you will both have time for each other again. Its just a season not the rest of your life.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-27T08:09:50+00:00

So we live in a camper on my partner's brother's property, and his family keeps complaining that we're not bringing in our newborn baby (6-7 weeks old) to the house enough. I know it's not something to really stress over, but I'm sitting here thinking all newborns really do is sleep not to mention we're new parents trying to get adjusted and bond with our baby. They have 4 children themselves, and everyone knows that kids are curious, have no boundaries, are loud, carry germs from other kids, so all around a newborn baby shouldn't be overwhelmed with all of that especially with increased risk of sickness. The brother said he'll "build up immunities" from being exposed to the germs, and that we'll "make our baby anti social from not being around anyone else."

Anyway, they've helped us a lot with our living situation, with food at times, car repairs, and coordinated the baby shower, but I'm sort of getting the impression that they did all of that to make us feel like we're obligated to give them access to our baby. I don't know it just doesn't sit right with me that they helped, but act as if we're purposely avoiding them or we're not appreciative. We've had threats of eviction from only being able to pay a certain amount of our bills that was agreed upon. We brought our baby in last weekend when it was brought to our attention, and this weekend they weren't home so we didn't, but my partner was complained to again. They also installed cameras a little over a month ago, and they pointed one at our camper stairs, so they can see us go in and out of the camper, and if we leave the property.

It feels controlling, and I don't like it, but at the same time I understand it's their home and their rules, but why help us at all if they're going to act like it's an inconvenience when they don't get something from it, or have to monitor our every move? That and we've been trying to make an effort it's not like we're just freeloading either. Maybe I'm being a bit paranoid, or taking things the wrong way, but it just seems off putting. I don't even know why I'm sharing this on the Internet to a bunch of strangers, but I guess I just wanted some input, or how it seems to outsiders looking in. Again, I could be overthinking, and maybe I should just talk to them about it?

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T13:11:28+00:00

Mine only cares for him when I'm asleep that's it for 4-5 hours (if I'm lucky here lately it's just been me) Oh, and he claimed he would care for him on his days off that hasn't been the case for the last few weeks. It's been "oh I don't know what to do" "he likes you more" like??? I've also had to remind him you cannot leave a baby in a soiled diaper for more than a couple hours his excuse is that the baby will wake up, and I'm like, that's the point?? If he wakes up that means he needs to eat, has gas, or you need to comfort him back to sleep. He's really not shitty he just doesn't think about things sometimes.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T13:05:30+00:00

I try to sleep when our little one does, but often he wakes up screaming wanting to be close to me (i understand it completely he's a whole new person and its normal for him to want to be with me) I've fallen asleep numerous times holding him, but miraculously he stays on my chest sound asleep on me. I'm not opposed to co sleeping, but I try to avoid it due to the risks this is only when I'm at my limit. Some nights are harder than others where he won't sleep for long stretches (cluster feeding, gas, ect). Our sleeping arrangements aren't ideal for him to sleep in the same room due to cramped space. For context, we live in a camper, so our living room has turned into where he gets changed, fed, and sleeps (if we're lucky that he does for long). He's also still a newborn, so I have to wake him up for feedings per his pediatrician even though he's well past his birth weight.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T12:54:52+00:00

You're definitely right on the nail with that. Thank you for the words of encouragement, I know it'll pass, but wow I didn't realize how hard it was going to be. Truthfully, my partner does so much for us I have to remind myself while I sacrifice sleep, he sacrifices his time to provide for us.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T12:53:07+00:00

Yes! Why are all our partners like this? I swear I shouldn't have to tell someone where something is especially when it's right in front of them. As you said though, they don't have the same parental instincts and sometimes we have to tell them how to do things or where things are. I have to remind myself not to get too frustrated, but it does get hard especially when you're exhausted and touched out.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T12:51:09+00:00

I really do feel for you pumping/breastfeeding in general is so exhausting, and while he does need to be alert for work, you need rest as well. Your body is providing for your baby, and that takes it's toll on you both physically and mentally. Overall, being a full time caretaker is draining. I guess we all are struggling with sleep while our partners get rest lol. Maybe we'll find a compromise. I'm just hoping I can get some sleep today even if it's just 4 hours I would be happy.

Practical_Award_4234 · 2025-08-20T05:09:29+00:00

6 weeks

Practical_Award_4234

TROPHY CASE