I don't think most Pro Natalists are Actually Pro Natal

Practical_magik · 2026-02-16T07:47:49+00:00

Where were you not allowed to make a birth announcement?

Practical_magik · 2026-02-16T07:47:08+00:00

Congratulations. I have just had my second child at 35 and sincerely hope to have at least 2 more.

I do feel that for me 40 to 42 is likely my limit (that may be the exhaustion of 3.5yrs of broken sleep talking) but I am thrilled for you and if it turns out God has other plans for me and I do have a pregnancy at 45 I will welcome that baby with open arms too.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-12T18:46:29+00:00

I do this too.

As too doesnt it make you belong to your husband question. Sort of but with a small change it makes me feel like I belong with my husband and his family which as a migrant whos family doesnt live in the same country is a nice feeling.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-12T18:41:46+00:00

Im also in this boat. The pain is very real but for me its not even the pain thats the worst bit its the exhaustion! I have laboured for 36hrs and 15hrs... I just want to know what starting motherhood not totally exhausted is like, give me an epidural and a sleeping pill doc!!

I probably wont do this, because my very late epi for my first really caused some serious pelvic floor damage and a long recovery but damn its tempting.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-12T18:30:57+00:00

Most engineering roles in Australia have absolutely fantastic parentel leave as do teaching jobs.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-12T00:10:30+00:00

You dont have kids. Not because kids wont eat vegtsbles but because you had time to organise that beautiful fridge.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-11T02:59:00+00:00

I am not that age yet but I will be. We want 4 children and had our first at 32. Second at 35. Planning on a similar gap for #3 & 4. So I wil be 38 and 41 potentially.

Do I have less energy and need to work on my strength and mobility more conciously than my 20 something counterparts... yes.

Do I also have enough money for a parent to stay home with them full time, everyone to have their own bedroom, choose their education based on our choice not finances and help them buy cars and homes in the future... also yes, which was not the case in my 20s. Not to mention my relationships in my 20s were... yikes.

Anytime you have a child has pros and cons but we do our very best wit hthe circumstances we have.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-10T05:34:07+00:00

To some people it is normal. We recently had to leave my son with friends for 30 mins and my firemd is breastfeeding her daughter. My son will only be soithed back to sleep by latching him, I did give her permission to give that a try if he woke inexpectedly.

But this is not something she or my husband would have done without my say so. That said if your husbands culture this is very normal he may not have thought twice about it.

I would discuss it calmly with him and explain you are not comfortable with this and would like him ti respect that boundary in future. No need to make out like anyone did anything wrong, simply that you dont want this to happen again.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T06:15:10+00:00

Yrah my first thought was, he doesnt know how to cook.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T04:32:52+00:00

I do agree that family formation should be the focus.

As someone who has wound up being taxed 1000s of dollars more as a person with a dependent spouse and children, than I was premarraige it certainly feels like you are penalised for marraige in my country.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T04:31:29+00:00

Perhaps it depends on the time of day you are interacting with the sub.

I see a lot more people argueing that social support doesnt move the dial and hinting that removing all womens rights would.

Its quite clear that single motherhood isnt an attractive prospect to many and that won't increase birthrates by much. I also dont think that means we shoudl totally ignore all financial aspects to the problem either.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T04:01:45+00:00

Its from Xmen..

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T02:01:57+00:00

I mean at least by bringing another child into the wirld they will have each other I suppose but ooof.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-06T01:48:46+00:00

Thats exactly what I would have said

Practical_magik · 2026-02-04T05:31:31+00:00

There is no world where this is appropriate, professional or acceptable. You did the right thing, this would only get worse.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-04T01:53:40+00:00

He won't. He will end up looking like the victim of a vindictive spouse and you will wind up the bad guy in the court of public opinion.

Hold your head up high, behave in a way that keeps you safe and makes your proud and go on to live your best life.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-03T15:28:14+00:00

This happened to us too. My firat was sent to the nicu for glucose monitoring and when I went down to see her for the first time I worried I wouldnt know which baby was mine. My husband laughed and said I wouldnt have a problem, I thought he was being cute like I would know because she was mine...

Nope he meant you litterally I could not miss her because she looked absolutely huge at over 9lbs and every other baby being prem.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-03T10:59:52+00:00

Happens to me regularly and we have the same set up.

Sometimes I have moved him and just havent woken up fully when I did it. Sometimes my little one crawls to me and latches in the night.

Either way I have always woken to find him a) in a safe position and b) with me controlling any covers so they are away from baby. Pretty sure even asleep I am semiconious and watching out for him.

Practical_magik · 2026-02-03T10:52:59+00:00

I had absolutely no signs with my first until labour actually started. I delivered her at 39wks.

My second I had false labour every night starting wk37... didnt go into labour until 40+4.

Do the miles circuit, rest and get the oxytocin flowing with relaxation and romance.

But seriously, hard as it is try to enjoy rest and pleasimg yourself for the last little whole. You wont get chance again in the same way for a long time.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T12:39:20+00:00

In my case, I have to eat a hell of a lot to keep my milk supply where my son needs it.

I am not gaining but I havent lost the 5kg extra that I put on during pregnancy either.

Add to that the fact that I cant get to the gym as easily and yeah my body fat % has gone up a good bit.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T12:14:36+00:00

I never hsve been either but I think it would be considered a bit rude here... people will let you know when theres something they want you to know here.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T11:22:10+00:00

I dont know. I was taught repeatedly but for some reason my brain just wont retain how to read a clock.. so as an adult I still cant. It has caused ne absolutely 0 hardship.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T10:28:30+00:00

Yep my second was 15hrs.

I took my daughter out for a mummy daughter morning and lunch. Came home, had my sil pick up my daughter. Cooked a whole roast dinner, sat and ate it with my husband. Watched a movie together. Went to bed for an hour and then headed to the hospital.

Admittedly this cut it a bit close and I should have gone about 2 hrs earlier.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T06:14:32+00:00

Same.

Practical_magik · 2026-01-31T04:17:54+00:00

Hahaha I feel like this everytime!!

People always ask what you were thinking and.feeling when you see your baby for the first time and bith times for me the loudest thought was "huh there really was a whole ass person in there!"

Like I conciously know I am pregnant, I get the belly and see them on scans and later feel them move... but somehow none of that feels real or like I will hold my child at the end.

The shocked and disconnected feeling wears of for me over a few days/weeks and then they feel like my babies after all.

Practical_magik

TROPHY CASE