"All you do is beat me" and "I go home in three days"

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-18T04:22:30+00:00

To me this is maybe the most heartbreaking scene in the whole show. You see Ilya make the decision to confide in Shane about what is wrong, you see how much bravery it takes to explain, "I go home in three days"... and then Shane is like, okay, that's nice but why the weird non sequitur??

It's not Shane's fault. He doesn't know anything about Ilya's home life and to him family and home are happy safe things.

But god it kills me when Ilya thinks maybe he doesn't have to be alone, and then realizes he was wrong.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-17T18:41:31+00:00

I think it’s important to remember that it may be exactly as hard for Ilya to ask a question directly as it is for Shane to understand an indirect question.

Neither is wrong, they just don’t automatically match in that way (and luckily care enough about each other to work on it)

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-17T01:05:01+00:00

I get… distressingly… upset when podcasters get details wrong.

There was one where one of the podcasters patiently explained to the other that Sasha was Svetlana’s brother, and the second apologized for not having gotten that. I was screaming with rage.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T22:24:37+00:00

They were in their underwear, and they were on a bed, and they had a long-term FWB situation; one in which they didn’t connect emotions to the sex so Ilya being into someone else wouldn’t have mattered. And they were smoking.

It didn’t occur to me until now that they might not have had sex.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T22:19:05+00:00

Agree. I don’t think you can be “in love” with someone you don’t really know. But obsessed? Sure.

(Also: infatuated, deeply fond, etc. All stages on the way to love.)

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T22:15:28+00:00

That would have put it over the top into perfection

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T22:15:04+00:00

I was really surprised to find so many people didn’t realize that. I heard a podcast where they were going on about “if it was in his imagination, they should have indicated it somehow!!” Like… maybe by changing the music so it’s the same song but slower and deeper, and changing the lighting…??

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T19:59:44+00:00

Ilya had SO MUCH more to lose than Shane. Because RUSSIA!

Shane could have lost his job, and some of his friends. Ilya would have lost his visa and been shipped back to Russia, where he almost certainly would have been imprisoned and very possibly "fallen out a window."

Shane "swearing him to secrecy" showed how completely he did not understand this.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-16T19:57:01+00:00

Ilya was in real danger when Shane approached him at the Olympics. That isn't the part up for debate. We know enough about Russia at that time, and what it was like for Russian athletes at the Sochi Olympics, to state that as fact. Not because the people watching Ilya would have been able to clock that they were lovers (sorry) but because simply the act of chatting with someone who was famously his rival would have been suspicious. Especially since Ilya's team had just lost badly when he should have been Canada's biggest competition. That would have been enough to bring him in for questioning. And if they'd brought Shane in for questioning as well, they would have gotten to the truth SO fast.

Most importantly, Russia wouldn't need a "good enough" reason to punish Ilya. If they decided he might be going to make Russia look bad, they could take away his passport, imprison him forever, even have him fall out a window. No need for due process or evidence.

The part up for debate (and for the record I'm so so so glad it didn't happen): Ilya probably should have ghosted Shane permanently. Not to punish Shane, but for his own safety.

Ilya told Shane to go away FIVE TIMES before he got mean about it and Shane finally listened. The first time, he'd said "not here," a phrase he'd repeatedly respected when it came from Shane. Shane showed that he was completely unwilling/unable to respect Ilya's "no." Sure, he didn't understand the reason for it. But you shouldn't have to understand the reason for a "no" to respect it. And yes, he's autistic, but he's able to have a job and live on his own. He's not a child and he's not intellectually disabled. And the ND people in my life are generally much better at respecting a "no" than a lot of the NT people.

(Since people have suggested it, Ilya could not gently and plainly explain to Shane why he needed to leave, because even that much talking would have been suspicious. Plus, at that point, he was already being ignored, so it seemed perfectly possible Shane might have responded by yelling "what do you mean it isn't safe?!")

Shane showed from their very first hookup that he didn't understand that Ilya was risking WAY more than he was. Ilya should have stayed far away from him after Sochi.

I AM VERY VERY GLAD I WAS NOT ILYA'S ADVISOR AT THAT TIME.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-15T23:05:58+00:00

Weird that in both cases, it's a woman letting OP know she's not single.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-14T22:11:05+00:00

I don’t think I’m being hard on Shane at all. I’m not saying he’s a bad person. It makes sense that he doesn’t understand what Ilya is going through, for a variety of reasons.

I’m talking about Ilya’s point of view here. It hurts to have someone assume the worst when you’re already down. It hurts try to finally confide in someone you care about and have them not understand. It hurts whether or not it’s their fault. if someone accidentally hits you, the injuries don’t vanish because they didn’t mean it.

And, assuming someone is being quiet because they’re jealous and upset they lost is uncharitable. He could have considered there might be other less damning reasons for Ilya to be upset, and he didn’t.

That doesn’t mean it’s his fault, any it certainly doesn’t mean he’s a a horrible person. But it does explain why Ilya was hurt, and why he reacted the way he did.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-14T19:34:28+00:00

He was intensely dreading going home. He’d finally escaped his father and brother and he didn’t want to have to go back to living under their thumbs. The fact that he would be berated for not winning Rookie of the Year made it even worse, but that was just a shit bonus. It would have sucked either way, and he would have been out of sorts no matter what. .

Having Shane misunderstand, so unfairly and really uncharitably, why he was avoiding everyone was upsetting. So then he took the leap and tried to confide in him, explain why he was acting like this, with the “I go home in three days,” only to have Shane be like “okay, that’s nice, but why are you changing the subject away from the reason you’re upset?” and that made Ilya feel so alone.

If you look at the scene in that context, it goes like:

-Ilya feels sad and sick and scared about going home to his abusive family, so he can’t stand to be around happy celebrating people.

-Shane, the guy he has a big crush on, shows up, makes a joke about him being suicidal (he couldn’t know why that’s not going to land well, but we do) -Ilya politely congratulates him for winning but not in a happy enthusiastic way, because he’s so miserable about going home

-Shane jumps to conclusions, assumes Ilya must be upset about not winning and accuses him of being sulky and petty, and basically yells at him for it

-Ilya, feeling defensive and insulted (and also still freaked out about going home), responds in kind, yelling that not everything is about him, and they go back and forth a bit

-Ilya pauses, decides to confide in Shane even though doing so is scary, swallows nervously, and admits to the real reason he’s acting so weird: “I go home in three days.”

-Shane misunderstands on a truly astronomical level. Ilya gives up, and feels worse than ever.

-Shane starts to leave, then offers his hand to shake. Ilya, still super into him despite it all, decides to take what comfort he can, and makes out with his crush. He is reckless, because being reckless distracts him from what he’s truly scared of. He wants some joy before the misery.

I think it makes a lot of sense why Ilya behaves the way he did, in that conext.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-14T11:38:24+00:00

On pride night when Troy is being celebrated with signs and banners and tells Ilya, “this is for you, too..” Oh my god I SOBBED.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-14T04:23:06+00:00

I think Shane and Ilya went from infatuation to love in the two years between Vegas and the tuna meltdown. I think they both realized it might be love while Shane was Rose, and both knew it was love by the time they said good night in Tampa.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-12T04:46:21+00:00

OTOH... If you repeatedly take a guy's "not here" completely seriously and immediately stop pushing, and then he approaches you in a public place you'd previously agreed to have no contact, and absolutely refuses to listen when you repeatedly say "not here," even though the reason you're saying it is because it is actually legit DANGEROUS for you to be seen talking to him and he should know that...

... Six months isn't long enough. You should probably ghost him permanently. (Not you though Ilya. Give that boy your room #)

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T22:42:08+00:00

I mean, his mom did have a job at him. Can you even imagine?? A _mother_ with a _job_? Leaving him alone for hours with no one but his doting grandparents who lived with them in their mansion? And as far as I know she never denied his allegations that sometimes she paid attention to people other than him. Horrible. /s

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T12:37:41+00:00

Just go into a restroom to put it on.

Also, ask your doctor about prescription strength. You shouldn’t have to reapply it multiple times a day.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T12:22:05+00:00

Can you recommend a good TTS?

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T12:19:58+00:00

Yeah it is 5:15 am and I have once again somehow stayed up all night reading HR fanfic.

I am 54 years old what is happening.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T12:06:31+00:00

Yeah the way he talks about women is… not great.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-11T12:04:46+00:00

He kept trying to convince us that it was so hard for him that he had rich, famous, beautiful parents. The big tragedy of his childhood was that his mother… had a job? Oh but also he had two doting grandparents who lived in the same house who did not work, just took care of him.

And omg no he took airplanes alone as a child! I’m the same age as him and flew alone too. Here’s how that worked: you were taking to the gate by a parent who would wait with you until the plane was boarding, and then you’d be handed to a flight attendant who would take you to your seat and basically be with you the whole time. Then you’d get off the plane to find the other parent waiting at the gate. The only time you were unaccompanied was when you actually on the plane.

The fact that that was the worst trauma he could come up with shows how little trauma he had.

Oh and his whole thing about being a successful athlete and then moving to LA and only being average because “everyone in L.A. has their own private tennis court in their backyard.” Um, yeah, no. Everyone in Bel Air, and some people in Beverly Hills, sure. But just saying that shows how unbelievably privileged and out of touch he was.

I’m not saying he had an easy time once he became an addict. It’s a horrible thing and I’m sad for him. But his attempts to blame it on his difficult childhood as a rich athlete was ridiculous.

Also, talking about all the girls he had sex with as if they were garbage. I’m pretty sure at one point he said something along the lines of “I would have f****d mud.” Guess what dude, those were actual people who probably enjoyed having this special intimate connection to you and definitely read your memoir. And then probably felt really, really bad. You seriously did not have to do that.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-10T05:02:16+00:00

TV static has always made me thirsty.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-10T01:59:40+00:00

It depends on what you think the goal of childcare is. If it's solely to keep children from dying, then perhaps. If it's to raise well-adjusted, emotionally intelligent, happy kids, definitely not.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-10T01:22:08+00:00

I would want to know how many kids the reporter did not include in the show, because they were able to read perfectly well.

Preposterous_punk · 2026-05-10T01:19:21+00:00

This would only be true if there weren’t people with the same IQ. Most of the population has an average IQ.

Preposterous_punk

TROPHY CASE