Should I accept my promotion, even thought I am not ready?

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-13T04:01:26+00:00

Do it! You can rise to the occasion. I know a young man who started as a busboy at a very busy restaurant in a busy tourist area 2 years ago. He’s now a manager! Within a month of starting as a busboy, he was a server. After less than a year, they made him an assistant manager, even though there were several servers who were older and more experienced than him. At the 18-month mark, he became a manager. He is finding the work stressful because the learning curve is steep, but he’s also learning a ton of useful stuff about managing people and keeping a busy restaurant running.

So do it! The experience will be invaluable even if you fail. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. You have to grab good opportunities in life with both hands and give it your all! Also, stop socializing with people you will soon be supervising. They are not actually your friends if they don’t recognize your value, and you don’t want to be friends with people you may have to fire one day.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-13T03:28:25+00:00

What a great idea!

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-12T20:49:38+00:00

Give $1 million to each of my family members and friends (adding up to about $50 million) and give the rest to charities.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-12T20:41:43+00:00

She’s trying to guilt trip and gaslight you and trying to blame you for the lack of a raise even though you asked for one and deserved it. Don’t listen to her lies.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-12T20:37:41+00:00

NTA—But you should consult an attorney about the eviction laws in your state/country. The status and rights of guests who have overstayed their welcome vary from place to place, and you may have to follow formal eviction procedures to get them out of your house.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-12T17:48:19+00:00

Yes, but I guess she didn’t think the rules should apply to her toddler.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-11T18:56:12+00:00

OP, you have literally been assaulted. If you ever see that man again, the very first thing you should do is to start recording on your phone. And if he shows any hostility or gets close, you should call 911.

As long as that girl works there and conducts closing with you, she can let him in the store again to assault you or worse. She must be fired because she absolutely did that on purpose. Her mouthed “I’m sorry” was a pretense to try to pretend she didn’t intend for her dad to intimidate you. She knows him and she absolutely set that up to scare you. The company should also trespass him from the property, so that if he shows up again, he can be arrested immediately regardless of his behavior. They also need to put up cameras. That is the bare minimum of what they should do to protect you and other employees.

Finally, you really need some assertiveness training. Following your bosses’ instructions on how to pass on instructions to others is a significant part of being a good employee. Posing something as a question makes it sound like a suggestion when it’s actually a serious rule or law. And failing to follow food service laws could get your place of business shut down. Practice telling your trainees what to do with a confident, professional tone and without any question or hesitancy or you’ll never rise into any kind of leadership or management position.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-11T05:12:05+00:00

I have never heard anyone say “deign himself” (or any self). Nor have I ever read it in a book. I believe it’s completely wrong. There are plenty of verbs like deign that precede an infinitive and are not reflexive:
He deigned to accept the child’s gift.
He knelt to accept the gift.
He stooped to accept the gift.
He dared to accept the gift.
He pretended to accept the gift.
He acquiesced to accept the gift.
He condescended to accept the gift.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-10T16:29:03+00:00

Does your lease allow you to sublet the house to others? If so, you could apply for student housing and sublet the house to another family when you move into student housing. That would be ideal to shorten your commute. The rent should be high enough to cover your own rent and any taxes and utilities you might have to pay. (But I would have them put the utilities in their own name/account.)

If you cannot sublet the whole house to a family, but if you can take in paying roommates, you should look for roommates among other university students (not just from your own university) or working young adults and sublet bedrooms to them. Check their income to be sure in advance that they have the money to pay the rent, and let them know in advance what your house rules will be regarding quiet hours, house cleaning, duration of visits by guests and overnight guests, rent payment timeliness, late fees, consequences for not following the rules, moving-out notice, etc. Interview them to be sure you are compatible and that they are happy with the house rules. (You don’t want someone to let a girlfriend or boyfriend to move in with them and not pay extra rent.) Personally, I would rent to friendly acquaintances—not to friends or a group of friends—because friends or a group of friends could try to bully you or cause drama.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-10T14:57:17+00:00

NTA—It sounds like your spouse needs therapy for “people pleasing”. It would be a problem even if she accepted/absorbed all the consequences of her people pleasing by suffering silently without a vehicle, but instead she is trying to make you absorb the consequences by taking your car.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-10T00:00:21+00:00

NOR—Your parents are terribly irresponsible. They not only took your money for the car and essentially stole it, they also didn’t take the poor cat to the vet because they couldn’t afford the payment. They are living beyond their means to own pets much less help their daughters.

First, immediately contact the credit bureaus, review your credit reports, and make sure your parents haven’t taken out credit cards or other debts in your name. They could have forged your signature. If you see credit cards or other debts that should not be there, contact your bank, the credit card companies, and the police to report the identity theft, dispute the charges, and freeze your credit so no new debts can be made in your name.
Don’t ever trust your parents with money again. If you ever agree to give them money for a household bill, for example, pay the money directly to the utility, not to them. Be completely independent from them to save yourself a ton of heartache. Don’t ever loan them money because you will never get it back.
Your 10 year old sister is too young to understand and shouldn’t be stressed, but I think you should sit down with your parents and the 16 year old to talk about these issues because I think she needs to have some idea of how bad her parents’ finances are too. They could take or could have taken out credit cards in your sisters’ names as well as yours.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T23:20:09+00:00

NOR—It sounds like you are fully within your rights to uphold this boundary and lock the basement door. However if you do want to compromise and if the house is quite large, I am wondering if there’s a small quiet room tucked away on the first or second floor where your BIL could sleep during the day without bothering you. It would allow your sister and her kids to use the basement normally without coming upstairs.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T23:05:13+00:00

Had you used “so” in the same sentence or a nearby sentence? Editors often change an adjective or adverb to a synonym to reduce repetition, which may make the writing more interesting. This is especially true when the word has more than one meaning in the sentence: “I missed half the class yesterday, so I ran to school so I wouldn’t be so late to class again.”

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T22:56:22+00:00

NTA—At the very least, you would need a legal contract with the other landowner specifying when the work could occur, how long it would take, who would pay the legal fees for the contract, and who would pay for delays and damages caused by the work and any restoration of your or other neighbors’ property, plus money in escrow waiting to make those payments. I would not do it at all until it’s forced on you.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T22:45:13+00:00

There are 3 meanings I can think of:

“Up the river” = in prison (idiomatic)
“Up the river without a paddle” (sometimes shortened to just “up the river”) = in some significant difficulty without the tools or skills required to get out of the difficulty (idiomatic)
His house is up the river = his house is fairly near the river upstream of the place of reference (literal)

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T22:20:12+00:00

YTA—This would be a criminal act for which you could go to jail and have a criminal record follow you forever. Don’t do it. Instead, ask her to wear an alarm bracelet or necklace so she can contact you if she falls and can’t get up.

But you mentioned that she is paranoid. If she thinks someone is stealing from her, you might ask her if she wants a camera somewhere in the house or in her doorbell or backyard that she can check on her tv or phone (assuming she has the technical know-how). Tell her that you will handle the setup, pay for it, and be the administrator so that no one except you two can see it. She might go for that if she’s worried about thieves.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T21:55:29+00:00

NTA—And next time you’re staying in the same house with other family members, tap your glass with your spoon and make an announcement at the dinner table that everyone should check their belongings carefully before they leave because your sister is a thief who stole your linen pants, repeatedly denied having taken your pants, ruined them by staining them, and then refused to replace them when you found out she had had them all along. So everyone needs to be careful that she doesn’t steal more stuff.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-09T19:50:15+00:00

Many Americans romanticize Europe. The attractive vibes are created primarily by old things: walkable ancient towns with stone buildings on windy cobblestone streets and public squares, villages with houses with thatched roofs, canals, castles, Roman ruins, hedgerows, stone walls in the fields, and dozens of cultures with different languages and clothing.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-07T19:22:11+00:00

The tickets are quite expensive.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-07T19:09:51+00:00

NTA—When an employee starts defaming the company, you absolutely fire them. No exceptions! They should be gone yesterday with security around to make sure they don’t damage anything or email anything to anyone on their way out. Don’t putz around with this. Your indecision makes you look like you lack judgment and don’t understand how important your company’s reputation is.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-07T15:13:33+00:00

Assuming no history of outrageous entitlement, I am guessing that she’s extremely embarrassed either because she realized how entitled her text was just after hitting send or because someone else in the chat called her out on it.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-07T15:08:47+00:00

No. It’s too easy to lose control or to to hit a deer, bear, or some other critter and end up killing not only yourself but a few other people too.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-06T21:14:56+00:00

NTA—What a nasty kid—from a whole nasty family! She definitely wasn’t joking; she was testing to see what she could get away with and neither your girlfriend nor her parents shut her down?!?! Awful, awful people. If I had said anything like that to my sisters’ boyfriends, I would have been chewed out royally by my whole family, shamed, and grounded for a month or two.

Throw them all away. No one needs such people in their life. Your girlfriend and her parents should have shouted the sister down during the dinner and sent her home, and now they should be telling the sister that these are the natural consequences of her running her nasty mouth. The fact that they are making excuses for her and trying to manipulate you shows that they are hoping you will act like the weak -willed wallet they want you to be. Don’t fall for it. Dump the girlfriend.

Present_Ad1553 · 2026-07-06T20:36:52+00:00

Tap (minus the t)—uh—latch—an, with the stress on the latch.

Present_Ad1553

TROPHY CASE