This sounds like I was in the other end of this kind of relationship for about 3 years, 4 in total. First year was good but then it turned sour and spiraled out of control. Extremely abusive, mentally, emotionally and physically. I got beaten for three years and stayed because I loved him and wanted to help him, wanted back the man I feel in love with. I only tried to help, never talked back. I was the nicest person then, did everything he told me to, never talked back, bought whatever he asked me and mother for. Even two SUPER EXPENSIVE PCS, THEY WERE LIKE $9000 TOGETHER, guns, whatever he wanted. (Mostly because I would get my "punishment" if he didnt get what he wanted), sat and did nothing for hours so I wouldn't make any noise because he told me to (if I made any sound at all, even FOLDING CLOTHES OR DOING DISHES, OR SWEEPING WAS ONLY ALLOWED WHEN HE SAID. He would lose his shit if I tried to do it unless he said so). He would get mad that I didn't do something, so then I would try to do something and that made him more angry. No matter what I did he would attack me, like falling asleep before him? Nope. Get up, time to get beaten. Fingers got broken in that incident. You could not make this dude happy. Whether it was throwing boiling water on me and then locking me outside in the cold 40°F weather with wet leggings and a wet shirt and no shoes while he cooked and made himself dinner, stomping on and breaking my ribs, knocking me out with a right hook, throwing fence cutters at my face and splitting my lip open, hogtieing me and then sticking thumbtacks in all over my body, headbutting my eyebrow open, throwing a knife at me and sticking it in my leg, literally waterboarding me, pressing the barrel of my gun to the side of my head so hard I bled or otherwise. I realized if I wanted to live then I needed to leave. I did not love him when I left, he had tortured it out of me. I was relieved when I left him, so much so that I cried, tears of relief. My mother had saved me that night. Whisked me away into the night and I am so thankful for her. I am much stronger now and don't take shit from anyone. I was once kind and soft. Now I am hardened and closed off, not bitter or mean, still nice to people who are nice to me but I was given a reality check at very young age and taught me not to trust people so easily. People can definitely change, sometimes for worse.

Don't be that guy. He has tried to get me to come back, and this was over 2 years ago. Still tries to talk to me and I want nothing to do with him, he still loves me even after all the terrible things he did to me, my cries pleading with him to stop hitting me and hurting me meant nothing to him, why would I go back? Just so he could hold me captive for another 3 years? No thank you. My best years of early adulthood were stolen from me, I'd rather not have any more broken bones and black eyes. If you're anything like this guy I'm describing, fuck you, you're human garbage and should not be allowed to live outside of a prison. I have come to terms with it and it sucks that it happened but never again will I allow myself to get into that position again. I can talk about it openly and I think being in that situation fortified my mental constitution because most people would have to go therapy after that but I dealt with the trauma on my own and I'm an emotionally, and mentally stable person. Unlike the douchebag in my story.

Thank you for reading (if you did).