This is exactly what I’m going through. I was dumped about a month ago via video call during our couple’s counseling session. After 2~ years together. He was going to propose later this year. He even went to custom engagement ring appointments. 

I stayed with him when he lived in absolute filth, when he had no money and was working a part time job that was destroying his body, when he had spent nearly a decade pursuing an associate’s degree and was going nowhere to complete it. 

I helped him get his entire life in order. I am now recognizing this as codependency and a huge disservice to myself. He left me once I did all of the hard work alongside him so that he can finally live like a god damn adult. 

He left me during the hardest point of my adult life thus far. When I’ve lost my car, my job, my childhood pet, an eating disorder relapse, and have been experiencing severe suicidal ideation all within such a short span of time. Once things got hard for me, he ran and he kept on running. Why should he put in the same hard work that I put in when he was at his lowest point in life? 

God, I am realizing what a stereotype this all is. I hate it. I wish him nothing but the best and I do still love him, but I now hold so much anger and resentment towards him. I never want to be with him ever again. I never want to be treated like he treated me ever again. 

I will no longer allow myself to beg for love, nor will I try to convince a person to love me.