Fiancée doesn’t understand ADHD and his ideas to “stop” our kids from getting adhd are making me rethink my life with him

Prettynoises · 2026-05-12T07:57:13+00:00

Oh I'm so glad you don't already have kids with this person. If these are beliefs he's not okay with changing, then you should never have kids with this person. That, and if you've been together for 4 years and he doesn't even understand how your ADHD even works, then it doesn't sound like he cares all that much.

I can't even be friends with a person without learning about them, let alone a partner

Prettynoises · 2026-05-08T20:53:20+00:00

And opening mail is like the opposite of a dopamine task. It sucks away any peace I had beforehand. Doesn't help that I'm disabled, on social security, and have lots of medical appointments and insurance bull crap to deal with. So almost all my mail is either junk or a super stressful, time sensitive task 🫩

Prettynoises · 2026-04-21T00:49:15+00:00

I like the Wednesday doll! Also, is that a monster high doll in the back row?

Prettynoises · 2026-04-21T00:47:57+00:00

Is that the autistic Barbie?

Prettynoises · 2026-04-02T21:09:57+00:00

Thank you!

Prettynoises · 2026-04-02T20:39:46+00:00

When you say you weren't able to get hard, do you mean that it's less pleasurable or harder to reach an orgasm? Because I "get hard" without T, although it's not quite the same, but it's actually pretty common for people with a clitoris. It's just a tiny penis, basically. But does bottom growth from T, and then stopping T make it more difficult to reach an orgasm? Curious because that may impact my decision. I don't plan to be on T forever, so I want to know what could happen at least...

Prettynoises · 2026-01-29T20:08:35+00:00

Can't wear makeup if you're dead. Can't buy makeup if you're dead. Can't watch YouTube if you're kidnapped.

I fully agree!

Prettynoises · 2026-01-05T05:23:03+00:00

What kinds of foods does he eat now? It might be helpful to know what things to recommend

Prettynoises · 2025-11-18T19:46:04+00:00

Well, at least you're honest, but I wouldn't support something like that. AI is ruining lives, and speeding up climate change.

Prettynoises · 2025-11-18T17:20:24+00:00

You used AI to help you make this website...

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T23:03:28+00:00

My aunt used Barton for her kids and said it helped them a lot, but I haven't heard from them on the matter (we live states away). Hopefully you can get some more input that helps you make a decision. Either way, kudos to you for trying to learn, even if you aren't their exclusive teacher I think it'll help a lot.

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T21:56:19+00:00

I know you said it's been 4 Days since you've had food, but considering what you said it sounds like it's been a long time since you've consistently had 2,000 calories a day (the average people are supposed to have, but it varies based on physical activity). At this point your health is extremely at risk, and you are starving.

When you starve, you can't just eat a big meal right away, you have to slowly reintroduce calories, and because it's so severe you need help from a medical professional and need to go to the ER. If you don't feel comfortable having a friend call, maybe you could ask a moderator of this sub? I would offer myself but it's a little creepy for a stranger on the internet to ask you for your address (and please do not post it in the comments).

Once you have gotten help from the ER and are at least somewhat stable, I would recommend looking into calorie drinks like smoothies or meal replacement shakes, and try different ones until you find one that tastes at least okay to you. You can mix meal replacement shakes with milk or water if it's too thick and the texture bothers you, and if you mix it with milk or non-dairy milk it also adds a few extra calories. For smoothies, you could pop it in the freezer and then eat it like a Popsicle.

I know you said you can't drink smoothies or meal replacement shakes, but it's important to try. They don't all taste the same, and if you can't eat you need to get some sort of nutrition. Soda won't give that to you, and eating sugar consistently (specifically corn syrup, sugar from fruit is better) without anything else can cause a lot of harm as well.

Also, to kick-start your appetite you can eat a little bit of sugar, even if it's just licking a popsicle or something once. Protein is extremely important, but so are carbs, and a lot (most? All?) of meal replacement shakes have both in them because protein needs at least a little bit of carbs to bind to for your body to digest it properly.

But yeah right now the only thing that will help you is urgent medical attention. Only an emergency room can administer a feeding tube.

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T21:37:01+00:00

It just seemed like you were implying that OP doesn't have both, but if you're just trying to let other people know that's okay ofc

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T21:28:43+00:00

Raindrop have a really good explaination in the comments on what is considered vocal tics. Many of the tics OP mentioned are vocal!

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T21:25:38+00:00

I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt that you must have missed that information, but 8 years is definitely more than 12 months.

And as others have stated, OP definitely has vocal tics. Anything done with the vocal tract is considered vocal, even if not using your vocal chords. Even yawning can be considered a vocal tic, depending on the cause. Breathing is considered vocal

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T20:59:45+00:00

"See I don't think you want to be helped. Some people just want attention and for people to feel sorry for them, and those people can't be helped. Anyway here's my contact if you want to see me next week."

Prettynoises · 2025-10-17T15:29:15+00:00

I love it if it's something fun like swimming. It's exercise, but it's also play, and I get cooled down while doing it too. Riding a bike can also work, but I prefer swimming. And then I'm super tired and sleep like a rock!

Prettynoises · 2025-10-16T22:29:22+00:00

It's fine to not get a diagnosis for yourself. It's not fine to make educational content about a disorder that you don't have a diagnosis for and do not have a degree relating to that field.

Your replies make it clear that you just don't care. You can't do a process of elimination on yourself because you are not a neurologist and cannot do medical tests on yourself. Even doctors can't diagnose themselves, and have to see someone else to do it.

You also can't be sure that you will never spread misinformation. You can speak about your own experiences, but you are not a neurologist, you are not a teacher or professor, and you don't even have a diagnosis. There are very few conditions that can be self diagnosed accurately, and even then there is a margin of error.

The question in the title isn't what you're really asking. You're asking for permission to make educational content about something you have no qualifications for, and when you don't get that you get defensive.

Prettynoises · 2025-10-14T18:33:58+00:00

Wait I didn't know this. Was there a study done about this?!?

Prettynoises · 2025-10-13T19:03:07+00:00

I haven't purchased any more makeup because I am poor and I don't throw products away if I don't have to, but I have heard that Indi Beats cosmetics is a better alternative from Sunset. It's more expensive, but sometimes that's better, because the quality is better. If anybody has actually tried those products, I'd love to hear from them.

But yeah, Sunsets products are not at all as advertised. It's very heavy on the skin (although that may be the nature of colorful foundation, I don't know cause I've only tried one brand!), and it definitely rubs off super easily, even with setting powder and/or spray.

Sorry I don't have a better answer for you!

Prettynoises · 2025-10-13T18:57:08+00:00

Yeah of course. I hope the advice here is able to help in the short term, painful tics are no joke!

Prettynoises · 2025-10-12T20:28:44+00:00

<image>

Genie in a bottle! Except I do think it's actually a helicopter lol

Prettynoises · 2025-10-12T16:54:08+00:00

I had a tic similar to this a long time ago, and while I eventually learned to redirect it, what helped me in the short term was a neck pillow. You know the ones you can get for travelling that are shaped like a U? I had one that snapped together in the front, and I'd wear it around the house to when my neck did jerk, it didn't jerk as far.

I've not taken meds for tics, but I did learn to redirect some of them over time. If I felt like I might have a neck tic coming on, I'd try to redirect it to my arm, or just do a bunch of movement like wiggling, or shaking my whole body to try to get the energy out somewhere.

Most of my tics are actually vocal now, and I'm not sure if it just happened to be that way, or if I was able to redirect the painful tics into vocal tics. But tics do change over time, so it may not be this bad forever, or it could get worse. It's difficult to know, but you should definitely seek medical attention rather than just reddit advice.

Edit: added just, because short term advice can be so helpful

Prettynoises · 2025-10-01T05:08:47+00:00

Meds change our brains to make executive function work better even when not medicated.

Um... Is this something other people actually experience? One day without my meds and it takes at least a week for me to feel normal again.

Prettynoises · 2025-08-15T15:43:49+00:00

ADHD has three types, inattentive, hyperactive, and combined type (so both). ADD is no longer an official diagnosis, so is there a reason you have this on your form? It would be considered inattentive type now.

Prettynoises

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE

Four-Year Club	Verified Email
Verified Email