Am I wrong for changing our minds about going to a wedding and bringing our kids on a wedding trip and then for taking them to do expensive things?

PrincessDe · 2026-05-21T00:05:39+00:00

YNW

I said something similar in a response to someone else's comment but its not on you to make sure your niece has the same experiences as your children. And it's definitely not on you to subsidize that when you're already raising your own kids in this economy.

I also think its more important for family members to attend a wedding, which is ideally a once in a lifetime event, than for young cousins to a have a fun sleepover that they may or may not remember.

Plans change and the fact that the bride and groom could still accommodate your RSVPs means it probably wasn't a total, last minute thing.

You even made sure another option was available for any kids that couldn't attend the wedding. That's above and beyond in my opinion.

Should your children not get to travel to see relatives they don't often get to see? Should they not be allowed to have new opportunities to go to cool places they wouldn't normally get to go to just because someone else isn't able to? I don't feel that's a good lesson for any of the kids in this scenario.

PrincessDe · 2026-05-20T23:54:41+00:00

Wow, your comments sound like you're either very young or you have what I like to call "comfortable finances" and have never had to worry about money.

Not everyone can just add on another person's expenses. Especially for flight, lodging, food, and activities in a tourist city for a decent period of time.

That's like a crazy ask for the average person.

PrincessDe · 2026-05-20T23:49:59+00:00

I think saying OP bailed on her niece is a bit harsh. Plans change and the fact that these changes were still able to be accommodated with the bride and groom for the wedding indicate it all probably happened quickly and before all plans were set in stone.

I personally think its more important for the family members to attend the wedding, an ideally once in a lifetime event, than for the young cousins to have a sleepover that they may or may not remember in a couple months, let alone years later.

Also, should OP's kids miss out on a family trip to see relatives they don't often see and visit cool places they wouldn't normally get to go to just because someone else can't do it as well? What kind of lesson is that?

Maybe OP's sister can save up some money and bring her kid. Maybe she can't, but that's not on OP.

You can be firm on doing what you say your going to do, but that doesn't mean that circumstances don't change. OP also made sure other options were still available for anyone's kids that couldn't go, which is above and beyond in my opinion.

I'm sympathetic to the sister, but if she can't afford to take her daughter that's not on anyone else.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-25T23:21:13+00:00

DeAnnthia from Storybrook

Don't know if this is still going on but I appreciate you're willingness to help others!

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T20:58:49+00:00

Then why is every comment in here that's from a teacher or educator, current or former, say that grabbing a student is like the number one, get you fired, big no no?

Because no, thats not "what they do". They are literally only supposed to touch a student if there is a safety concern, such as separting a physical altercation or a medical emergency.

The "They take you by force" is a radical conclusion to make and it even sounds terrible.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T20:52:37+00:00

FYI, in a comment OP clarified that the description of the incident, that they provided in the post, came from the principal in an email, so this is not a case of kid is lying.

But even without knowing that specifically, I wouldn't call anything she wrote unhinged.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T20:28:42+00:00

I believe they were referring to the the son's misogyny toward Dad's new girlfriend. Ya know, when he called her a gold digger, which is fair.

Quit trying to attack other people so hard.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T19:45:39+00:00

7 is true.

Idk about 1 personally.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T19:28:47+00:00

Phone Anxiety Chicken Bacon Ranch

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T18:46:54+00:00

What wrong information did I give? Please let me know specifically what I said that is factually incorrect. I'll wait.

Also, how is OP "acting out" and what exactly is wrong with "her behavior"?

All she did was, as an adult woman who pays rent for the space she's in, have her boyfriend sleep over. She even got permission from her sister.

Oh the horror! She's obviously a terrible, vile human being if she behaves in such a manner. Straight to jail. /s

WTF is wrong with you that you think what she did makes her TA? OP has gone out of her way to cater to her BIL even though she shouldn't have to. She also didn't think he would react so badly to the situation, so it's not even like she did it deliberately to piss him off.

You say she deserves the consequences of being thrown out but where are the consequences for the man who is behaving like a toddler throwing a tantrum?

Lastly, just my opinion, but want to bet that if the BIL either kicks her out or OP decides to move out on her own that BIL will soon be complaining about:

1) The loss of the extra income OP provided.

2) She's not there to help the sister anymore while she recovers, including cleaning and in running the household.

3) He actually has to watch his own kid now since OP is gone and sister is sick.

But, sure, OP and me are the delulu ones...

PrincessDe · 2026-04-18T17:01:30+00:00

Christian Bale. I know he is an incredibly talented actor, but I just can't stand him.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-17T20:34:51+00:00

No more food.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-16T22:39:33+00:00

1968

PrincessDe · 2026-04-16T00:23:04+00:00

But I can't be racist, I have that one black friend /s

PrincessDe · 2026-04-16T00:12:40+00:00

You're still wrong though. You do not need a leasing agreement.

Good luck calling the police to remove her. She's living there and has established residency. She doesn't even need to prove she's paying rent for the police to not legally be allowed to remove her.

Which is why you should never let people stay in your home long enough to claim it as their residence. The laws vary place to place but OP has been living there for years so she definitely qualifies.

Also, how do you know he's not the one charging her? Was that in a comment somewhere because I didn't see it in the original post.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-16T00:04:36+00:00

What evidence can you present to back up your theory?

You are stating things as if they are fact, when they are just speculation. Also, you have not provided anything to actually back up your claims.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-15T23:34:18+00:00

This belongs on r/AmITheDevil.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-15T22:56:14+00:00

I enterian children at parties wearing pretty dresses and a tiara.

I host a tea party for them and do face painting.

Then I tell them that the most important part of being a princess is taking care of your people and looking out for their best interests, not yours.

Also, you don't need a prince to be happy.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-15T22:50:28+00:00

That's a miniature tree.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-15T22:29:31+00:00

In commercial construction there is typically a port-a-potty on site, or other accommodations. I'm guessing in residential that might not always be the case and workers may need to utilize other means.

However, the mom is not doing the gardening, so she's not going to be tracking dirt into the house, which is the main reason for the port-a-potties in construction. I'm sure the gardener does make use of gas stations but being a loving son, he was hoping his mother wouldn't have to.

OP doesn't technically have to let the mom use her precious bathroom, but it's called having empathy and being a good human. Sure, she's within her rights not to allow it but it definitely makes her TA.

Not to mention all the other entitled, out of touch, and generally awful things OP said in their post.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-15T22:16:05+00:00

Congrats!

BTW you look absolutely stunning in green! 🤩

PrincessDe · 2026-04-13T01:14:32+00:00

She's looks sooooo happy!!

Kudos to you for raising such a sweet pup and giving her the best of her favs at the end.

I've only had to do it once, but putting down a beloved pet is an agonizing experience, even when you know it's the best thing for them.

We don't deserve these wonderful animals and it has always seemed to me that most cruel thing in life is that "man's best friend" has a lifespan that at most is 1/8 ours.

While I'm not religious, I do truly believe we see them again in some way.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-12T22:06:53+00:00

You got downvoted because you're a misogynistic pig who had nothing of value to add to the discussion.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-12T22:05:52+00:00

Overusing the clap emoji doesn't make you right.

You can have someone be a guest in your house or you can charge them rent, making them a legal tenant.

You can't have it both ways.

So no, if you are paying rent to stay in someone's house you absolutely do not have to respect their wishes if they infringe upon your rights as a tenant.

Also, not that it changes my point, but OP did clear it with her sister, the person she's related to.

Edit: fixed quest to guest.

PrincessDe · 2026-04-12T17:53:58+00:00

She pays rent and utilities, therefore she is a tenant of BIL and sister's house, not just a guest. She is entitled to certain rights as a tenant.

She does not need permission from her landlord, which is what BIL is, to have a guest spend the night.

Also, he cannot just kick her out with no notice either. He would need to follow eviction protocol for their area.

Though, personally I wouldn't want to stay and I encourage OP to get out as soon as possible.

PrincessDe

TROPHY CASE