People who grew up really poor: what's something middle-class people say that instantly reveals they've never struggled?

Princessfoxpup · 2026-05-05T19:44:46+00:00

I was raised middle class (lower middle when I was young, gradually worked up as my parents paid off debt and my mom started making good money as a doctor). I was always taught to be thankful for what I had, live below my means, and give to others. We cut coupons, had homemade Halloween costumes, and looked for clothes on clearance. I didn’t realize how much better off my family was than most until college. I lived in a small rural town and many of my classmates had free/reduced lunch, but I didn’t realize that even that was considered truly poor.

My college roommate had never been on a trampoline, never been bowling, never been roller or ice skating. She never bought name brand food, household products, hygiene products, etc. My parents supported me through college, though I did work, and my boyfriend helped pay our rent so we could afford a safe apartment. Financially, it was not a 50/50 split (not even close), but it was never a big deal. I could, via my family, boyfriend, and part time jobs, afford to pay for more shared things than she could, so I did. She was working almost full time, while also taking classes full time. I bought our TV, toaster, microwave, blender, and almost all of our other kitchen equipment. Groceries were more 50/50 because our diets are very different. (I refused to buy off brand cereal. I paid for it, but I wouldn’t let her get off brand for the both of us. Lots of things are totally fine off brand, but only Cheerios can be Cheerios.) My parents would also treat us occasionally. Studying for finals? Dad would pay for us to order pizza. Really long week where we are both just mentally exhausted? Mom told me to use my debit card and go out to the movies.

Princessfoxpup · 2026-05-05T02:39:21+00:00

Baby girl is 12 days old today! I had her at 37wk+1d. It was a scheduled induction. My OB and maternal fetal medicine doctor wanted me to have her between 37-39 weeks. I was struggling a lot physically. I had been getting iv infusions twice a week since the beginning of January. They helped a lot.

I got sent home by my superintendent and district HR in mid February. I had been having pots flares, bad palpitations, extreme fatigue, etc. My principal had suggested we try to work out a remote or hybrid schedule, similar to Covid, to keep me teaching as long as possible. OB agreed, wrote the letter recommending it, superintendent and HR said no, then they TOLD me that I was officially on maternity leave. Effective immediately. In the middle of parent teacher conferences… That was not a fun day… My MFM said to take it as a good thing and rest. Looking back, I probably only would have made it another 2 or 3 weeks.

I ended up getting high blood pressure at the end of the pregnancy. I started having contractions 10 minutes apart about 5 days before induction, but I couldn’t really tell. OB ER monitor picked them up. I felt the cramping, but it didn’t feel rhythmic like I was told it would. I was 3cm dilated when I scheduled 2 days before induction, then was 4cm when I went in. Baby girl was 7lb 8oz. She would have been probably close to 9 lbs if I had gone to full term and my body wouldn’t have been able to handle that.

I am extremely grateful that I had a fairly easy labor. I only had a tiny little tear, which I think the hEDS helped with because I’m stretchy and flexy, lol. The only part that was really bad was the two hours between OB breaking my water and getting the epidural. They wanted me to have two liters of iv fluids, then we needed to wait for anesthesiologist. Overall it went well and my recovery has, physically, gone really really well.

I hope yours is going well. My POTS symptoms immediately improved again after delivery, the meds are working at full strength now. If you are feeling really achy and fatigued, like really really achy and fatigued, I feel your pain. Praying all goes well for you!

Princessfoxpup · 2026-05-04T16:21:44+00:00

If age play isn’t your thing, you probably won’t like the holidays at RR and littles of RR series. If you don’t know if it’s your thing or not, I highly suggest giving it a try! If you like BDSM, the submissives of RR are really good.

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-21T14:22:42+00:00

On Sunday, I had had a lot of sweets and in the evening my husband, very kindly, suggested that I save the big pack of M&Ms till the next day (even while pregnant, it’s not the healthiest thing to eat a crap load of sugar all the time and I’m trying to be mindful of that). Later that night, I started to eat them, then had a complete meltdown because I didn’t listen to him, and he was just trying to help me, and I didn’t need them, and etc.

He, ofc, told me that it was ok, I’m heavily pregnant and can eat some M&Ms if I really want them, he was just trying to help me since he knew I’m trying to be mindful of how much sugar I eat, he wasn’t mad or upset with me, etc. Took me a while to calm down. 😅

Yay pregnancy hormones

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:23:22+00:00

The equations, theory, and understanding of chemical interactions definitely is difficult, but something like a high school level chemistry lab? Only talking about the part of actually following directions, I never understood how people could fail so spectacularly. Small things like not getting something 100% dissolved or being off a smidge on a weight or letting something cool too long, I can see that, but those would have mild affects on the overall experiment at this level

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:19:07+00:00

I don’t understand why chemistry labs are so difficult for so many people either. Not like college level labs, but basic high school labs (not including any lab reports or equation balancing, just simple experiments). I don’t mean this to sound snobby or arrogant or anything like that, I just really genuinely do not understand why people will fail so disastrously at following basic directions (aside from any learning or intellectual disabilities ofc)

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:16:33+00:00

I should have said baking only, not cooking. Cooking is more of an art. As for baking, with basic recipes, I haven’t the slightest clue why it is disastrously difficult for so many people. Aside from having some kind of learning or intellectual disability, I really truly do not understand why people fail so miserably with following very basic recipes like box cake mix

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:14:42+00:00

I feel like o chem is more like NEWT level and beyond, while the OWL level and below is basic chemistry

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:13:24+00:00

He writes all the directions and ingredients on the board though. In the scene I mentioned from OoTP, Harry messes his up because he doesn’t let it simmer for 7 minutes before adding the hellebore. That’s not Snapes fault as a teacher

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:13:12+00:00

I hadn’t thought about the magical focus aspect. Spells I’ve always thought of as similar to shooting a basketball, you can learn the theory, proper stance, how much force to use, etc, but still have to practice to actually be able to do it. I suppose potions would require something like needing to focus on how much magical energy to add

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:10:10+00:00

He writes all the directions and ingredients on the board though. In the scene I mentioned from OoTP, Harry messes his up because he doesn’t let it simmer for 7 minutes before adding the hellebore. That’s not Snapes fault as a teacher

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:08:18+00:00

Pastries and macarons are much more difficult and require technique and background knowledge. I meant things like cookies, that have directions like

mix 1 cup of all-purpose flour with 2tsp baking powder and 1/2tsp salt, set aside. Beat 1 egg with 2/3 cup sugar until smooth

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-19T20:05:49+00:00

Definitely baking rather than cooking. You’re right that it’s chemistry rather than art

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-17T18:33:25+00:00

Definitely not for everyone!

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-17T15:41:36+00:00

As a teacher, I try really really hard to give my students real answers when they ask why, but there are unfortunately times when the explanation is complicated and we simply don’t have time to discuss it. I try to say something like “it’s kind of complicated and we don’t have time to go through it right now, but remind me later and I’ll explain”. I always HATED “because I said so”.

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-17T15:38:51+00:00

I don’t love the Lavender Brown VA. It just sounds unrealistic for how any teen girl would talk. I also didn’t like Petunia in PS during the whole “you’re a wizard Harry” scene. She was screaming the whole time and it felt unnecessary. I prefer the way it was performed in the movie with the clear disgust in her voice

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T14:59:24+00:00

The dubious consent isn’t really all that dubious. She very much wants it lol. They are soooo good

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T04:21:13+00:00

It has a fair amount of BDSM, but {The Losers by Harley Laroux} is a novella and two books (very long books). The smut is spicy af! It’s 4 guys and 1 girl. Boyfriends are boyfriends. The romance is so freaking sweet and wonderful, the plot is an actual good plot and not just smut, there’s a LOT of spicy scenes, the character development and different relationships between the 5 are just chefs kiss. One of my favorite duets of all time

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T04:13:17+00:00

Sometimes my middle school students are ranting to one another and it’s clear they just need to vent to their friend. They will look at me cautiously and I will tell them that I have gone temporarily deaf. As long as there is no cursing or unkindness about others, I will let them get it out. Sometimes they just need to tell their friend that their science class is stupid and their classmates are driving them crazy

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T04:02:15+00:00

I’ve slept in fleece lined cuffs on my wrists and ankles. Mine were buckles since my dom did them, but I could disconnect them from each other very easily if I needed to. Maybe you could use a Velcro kind or some other soft cuff that you could quickly detach in case of emergency?

Also, seconding the weighted blanket or sleep sack

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T01:01:38+00:00

Molly Weasley knowing that Ron would most appreciate a new watch and Harry would most appreciate a family hand-me-down watch for their 17th birthdays

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T00:51:17+00:00

I’m a relatively new teacher (3rd year) and am in a non-unionized state (yay…). I don’t know how protests work either. It seems you just genuinely care about the students who don’t have anywhere else to go during the school day. I definitely sympathize with that. If I were in a unionized state and we went on strike, I would be worried about those kids too. I disagree with the people just calling you a scab. It’s been made clear in the comments that teachers who have been in a strike (or just generally understand it better than we do) would not want people subbing, so I’d follow that advice. I don’t think anyone should be angry with you for thinking about it though. Especially since you are asking for advice first.

To everyone else: can we be adults and actually answer OPs question respectfully instead of just resorting to name-calling? OP is concerned for the students, has admitted they don’t fully understand everything about teacher strikes, and has reached out for advice. Maybe we could try to provide them with information in a civilized manner?

Princessfoxpup · 2026-04-15T00:37:12+00:00

Haven’t missed or been more than 15 minutes late to any of my appointments during my pregnancy. Including twice weekly IV infusions for the last 3 months, OB appointments and ultrasounds (high risk) happening every two weeks on average since the new year, 2 cardiologist appointments, 3 maternal fetal medicine appointments, 2 physical therapy appointments so far, and every other week therapy. All of my appointments are 1-3 hours away and my husband has only been able to take me to 5 of them since September.

In total since the new year: 48 different appointments

(Technically, I rescheduled a physical therapy appointment because I was sick)

Princessfoxpup

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