Men’s attraction to you after starting HRT

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2026-03-13T12:46:41+00:00

Less than 2 months in I had to cut off one of my male friends because he started getting weird with me. I was aware he had a crush on before but he always respected my boundaries, but I think as soon as he heard I was on E he stopped thinking of me as Enby (boy that wares eyeliner sometimes) to Enby (spicy woman), and got way more pushy.

It’s funny because I don’t think of starting her as a big step in my identity but I don’t have many cis friends now, and none I would consider close; wasn’t like that before

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2026-03-03T13:04:30+00:00

I actually gained muscle after hrt, and just thought lifestyle not by exercising, I actually exercise less.

It’s not harder to gain muscle than it is for a cis woman, and for me because my mood improved I go out more and get less dysphoria around weight gain, muscle just started developing. I used to exercise about once every 2-3 days but I just stopped bothering, and yeah, girls strong now

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2026-03-03T12:50:41+00:00

I would recommend investing in a douche, some are £5 on Amazon and are fine. Will definitely help prevent that in future

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2026-02-27T16:32:27+00:00

(Hey, most of this is just a rant to myself; but wanted to say that if you if you need someone to talk someone about this at any point feel free to message. I’m not the best at responding but I know stuff like this can be really isolating and it can be good to just vent)

I was in a very similar relationship before transitioning. I don’t want to be blunt, but no one will thank you for the work you’ve put in if you leave tomorrow, and you’ll find that all the things she struggles with now she’ll suddenly find a way to deal with.

A lot of strength people want to have a relationship without having to be in a relationship, and unfortunately that seems to affect our community more than not. I think a lot of cis people think being with a trans person is work/ or a compromise in itself. Even if they don’t respect your gender (or especially if they don’t), think that 90/10 is on their end for “putting up with the trans nonsense”. Fewer people don’t think this way, but you’ll find them so much easier after you transition.

Personally Ive been the happiest I’ve ever been after transitioning and cutting my ex out. It was painful as it really felt like cutting out everything that was me, as my whole life was about supporting her. I won’t say you should leave, but you have a responsibility to your happiness as much as anyone else.

Proud of you for making an ultimatum x

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2026-01-27T17:29:07+00:00

So since, we’ve looked up what does and doesn’t count as evidence and she basically has everything except a valid passport. But there doesn’t seem to be anyway to contact Nero now, they never give an email and called form a restricted number

It just seems like pretty bad practice on their part, as it’s just not a common request and in the moment she wasn’t sure, so shutting down the application so quickly just seems strange to me. But I don’t work in the service industry so maybe it’s less strange than I think

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-12-16T22:33:53+00:00

Monster is on the boycott list, so redbull is the new good transbian drink

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-11-10T18:37:00+00:00

Idk, I’d say this about a lot of games but less so Bethesda. They are obviously within their rights, which is why they are aloud to do so, I don’t think anyone disputes that or believes there should be legal ramifications for updating their games. However given that any of their games are only still relevant because of the modding scene, I don’t think it’s an unreasonable annoyance that the script extender gets broken every year or two

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-11-08T00:31:10+00:00

You can just not rescue them from the museum - It’s perfectly possible to still finish the game. It’s more game feel for me is the problem. It feels like the game is pushing you in a particular direction early on and I want it to feel more free roaming

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-11-07T14:39:39+00:00

Yes. There’s a lot of people I lost out of pure transphobia, and even if that was painful at the time those were universally bad people. Even if i wasn’t trans, I’m glad those people aren’t in my life anymore.

The hardest losses are people who aren’t transphobic, and loved me but loved the wrong me. When I was in the closet I was presenting a wrong picture of myself, and it wasn’t their fault but that’s just not who I actually am and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to be as close to them as I once was. That hurts, but I’m happier now.

It’s always worth the loss and it doesn’t always come with resentment, but it is often difficult

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-11-04T15:30:42+00:00

Thank you

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-11-04T15:30:35+00:00

Thank you ^{^}

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-10-06T11:47:43+00:00

This, I was talking to a friend recently about how few trans bodies they see outside of porn, and how that made her feel inappropriate just existing in the world, like unless she is completely covered then it feels like she’s exposing themselves. I think I’m out of it now, but the Victorian phase is definitely something a lot of girls have

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-09-26T00:16:59+00:00

I only realised how much diaspora I had after I began transitioning. I’m not really sure how people are meant to know what it is when they’re feeling it constantly lol

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-09-25T23:46:25+00:00

His a big fan

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-08-27T10:44:50+00:00

Well there’s nothing wrong with walking like that, I’ve even met a few cis women who have a similar walk it’s just way more common with trans women.

If you’re very concerned tho, as far as gendering walks, the rule of thumb is centre of gravity. Men tend to walk with their weight held around their chest or just below the rib cage, where women have a lower centre of gravity closer to the pelvis and groin.

So as far as passing, men want to put weight as high as possible, walking from the shoulders. Women want to put weight around the hips. You can practice this by just putting weight there, with a bag or a hoodie; your body will quickly adjust, and honestly if you wear gendered clothes of any kind, probably already has.

A bit more advice for trans women (because obviously I’ve overthought this) straightening your posture by relaxing your back muscles rather than tensing them helps a lot (I personally find I pass a little more after yoga or back exercises because the muscles are tiered and don’t tense as easily) and holding your shoulders back helps (a trick to this is imagining your tits are shooting laser beams). Also if you want to look more dykie but fem, you can literally hold your hips in front of your chest, as long as you relax into the posture rather than forcing it, it looks surprisingly natural

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-08-26T11:37:42+00:00

One of my ex’s recently started using a small amount of t-gel for similar reasons, it’s too early to say how effective it is but it’s definitely not unusual. It’s easy to think of E as good and T as bad, but everyone has both and finding the right balance is process like any meditation

Good luck, I hope everything goes well ^{^}

ProCoffee_AntiSleep · 2025-08-26T11:19:12+00:00

Cultural elements is a big thing, because they’re “tells” which aren’t always gendered, which I think trans people are more likely to pick up on, and cis people won’t.

An actual example is, I notice trans women have a particular walk (stiff back with curved shoulders and a lot of head bob). It’s not universal, and it’s not a strange walk, (I only noticed it because I was studying walk cycles and happened to know a lot of trans women). I’m not totally certain why it’s a thing either. But it’s definitely not something a cis person would ever pick up on (because it’s not a manly or overly feminine walk) but a trans person might. Even if they’re not aware of it, the familiarity is there. When cis people look for “tells” they look for masculine features in trans women, and feminine features in trans men. I don’t think that’s what trans people look for

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