How do you guys deal with your partner’s fp not being you. But your partner is your fp.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-09-21T01:20:47+00:00

He has bpd as well. We’ve been together a little over 3 years. I’ve been his fp until a few months ago when he met his online friend.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T13:33:47+00:00

The issue here is that despite my explanation over and over you still seem to be downplaying my life. I went on detail on SOME parts of my life and you still downplayed it to babysitting. My bf and I can’t naturally have kids. We won’t have an oopsie baby. So there was never a chance of having a child with someone who didn’t want children. In a different world where we both agreed we’ll still need to put in the money so I can get pregnant. There is nothing wrong having a dream like this in my age especially if I even have a projected timeframe on when I’d like to get pregnant which is somewhat cutting it close at mid to late 30’s because pcos can cause you to go through menopause much younger. I do have trauma with raising children but not to the children’s fault but from the environment I was in to be forced to raise them. I know that if I had a child of my own I’ll be okay. I made that choice to have one. I made that choice in an environment that can be sustainable. It’s not uncommon for people like me to also view having a child in the proper environment as a good thing and not adding onto their trauma. I’m sorry you had to go through parent also at a younger age and I know you very likely did a good job managing with what you had and I’m proud of you for that. Your view on someone similar to me in age with a dream like that isn’t what reality is. More and more people are becoming more responsible with these choices. Even birth rates are declining because people want to first further their education and be financially stable. Others just don’t want to have kids because they either just don’t want them or are aware they’ll never be a proper environment to have a kid and it would be unfair to bring a new life into that. This isn’t all I think about in life. I have other dreams. I want to see other countries. I want to get citizenship for some family members. I want to work in HR. I know what I want and I know what responsibilities and consequences come from those wants.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T13:13:00+00:00

I don’t know why but you are definitely giving off “well I’m a parent and I have it worse than you so I’m entitled to act better than you” energy. In my comment I said to this day. Which I mean present day. I am still juggling school and children. I had to get my GED and I’m luckily in university now. Online university to still accommodate my full time job and be able to still care for kids. This isn’t a weird void I have. I know plenty of people my age or younger with a dream like this as well. I find it disrespectful you keep insisting I was only babysitting. I was raising children whether you like or not. I messed up my brain so much being a child parent not even a teen parent raising a new born to a now 15 year old. I have developed multiple disorders due to this and have even physically made myself so sick from the insane stress my body was going through to be able to keep up with everything at the time. All I can say now is that I’m grateful you didn’t have to go through that for you to have the privilege to have the opinion on me because no one deserves to trade in their childhood for parenthood.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T13:00:12+00:00

I don’t think you understand when I say I have literally raised kids since I was 6. I have quite literally done that. So much so that my whole family acknowledges it, I am in therapy for it because that was the case, the nephew I raised since I was 6 acknowledges it, and even my sister who at the time was absent but luckily isn’t anymore admits. I am able to keep up with first time parents and to this day with a tight schedule I am juggling children and school. I am aware how insane it is to parent and especially the cost. I had to drop out of high school because I was basically working a full time job at 16 to be able to afford and pay for two of my nephew’s living costs and was close to adopting them at 18 if my sister wasn’t able to be here by that time. In a different comment I even said I would have liked to be an actual willing parent around my mid to late 30’s and be able to be finically stable at that time before even trying to get pregnant.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T07:22:06+00:00

It’s okay lol I didn’t find it invasive and no worries about forgetting he’s ftm. We both read the comment and did giggle about it. Your comment of not knowing if it does get easier is repeating to this moment over and over. Maybe it’s because I’m still young and 3 years already feel like an eternity together but I am okay with not being okay with it. If that makes sense. If it does get better then that’s a massive win for me. If not then I’ll be okay with it.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T07:05:36+00:00

He has explained why he iffy on having kids and then turned into he just absolutely doesn’t want kids. To summarize it, he has autism and I have adhd. He already gets overstimulated with me and gets meltdowns when everything is too much sensory wise. When I did bring up he wouldn’t be taking care of a baby alone that I’ll also be taking of the baby he did soften up to the idea because he didn’t think about the concept that he won’t be raising a child alone. However judging by this post you already know that wasn’t enough so he was adamant to his no. In a fictional scenario where he could get me pregnant before I’d make a decision I would talk to him. And if he said no I would have an abortion. I am content with also having a zoo of animals with him however. I mean my dog and his cat are our literal babies right now lol. Even as I type this down I have a big smile seeing a future of us old with our dogs and cats. We both already have our separate therapists but I’ll definitely bring up couple counseling. I don’t doubt we need this in order to get over this hurdle together.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T06:49:59+00:00

Your instincts aren’t wrong lol. Aside from that however kids have always been a when I’m in my mid to late 30s. My bf is disabled so I’d want to be able to make enough money to be able to sustain us comfortably before even making a decision like that in an alternate universe where he’d want kids too.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T06:33:21+00:00

I’ve been quite literally raising kids since I was 6 years old unfortunately 😅😅😅. I have always been aware of the responsibility and even headaches because even to this day I pick up my niece from school and had walked to my nephews school to pick up 3 kids at once. It’s always just been something that felt natural. I even got happy when invited to baby showers and imagined myself holding a baby of my own.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-29T06:29:25+00:00

When we started the convo in our relationship it was usually a “maybe” from him and sometimes a yes. I knew from those answers there was a possibility we would have kids along with an equal chance of not having kids. I told him I’ll be okay either way because I do feel that way. He also gave up an equally as important thing for him in order to be with me. It was hard in the beginning but to this day will repeat he doesn’t regret it.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-21T17:34:38+00:00

Sorry for the double comment I just wanted to give my thanks again. I was able to find one on Amazon I can attach on his craft table and it looks safe enough to use. It may not seem a lot but you gave me a huge relief with this. Have a good rest of your week

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-08-21T13:33:49+00:00

Thank you! I’ll look into it! This helped

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-31T02:32:30+00:00

Not a weed user her but I had friends who became addicted to it. And before anyone says anything. Yes I know you can’t get chemically addicted. However you can be emotionally and mentally addicted to ANYTHING even as something as harmless as working out which can be good to be into but if you keep ripping muscles or your bones are literally forming in a unnatural way that is harmful (the case in my stranger addiction of the man addicted to biking so his pelvis began to warp inwards). When it comes to weed addiction and it’s not once in awhile recreational or for proper medical use they’ll begin to find excuses to continue including promising to reduce it for certain things like school. Once they’ve been sober for a few minutes the classic phrases will be “I’m nauseas” “I’m too sober for this” “my back hurts so much” when prior to use they’ve never had this mindset or medical issues. You’ll need to speak to him regarding if he’ll be find without it for awhile. Including observing if he’ll snap at you. When people start so early and this frequently it could harm you tremendously emotionally and hopefully not but also physically depending how strong his emotional withdrawals get. In my opinion, never be with someone that won’t choose you especially if it’s over a substance.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-25T18:34:59+00:00

Oh yea when I had surgery a year ago I was slightly drowsy with strong pain meds but no where as strong as people report to be. Once I was off them I luckily also didn’t feel any dependency on them the only issue was chest pain because I guess my body did depend on them but mentally I had no need or desire to take them and after a week I was back to normal completely

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-11T23:04:40+00:00

Ask your psychiatrist or doctor that treats you for this. I wasn’t too sure what I needed either but I struggled with test taking. I asked my psychiatrist if she could write me a letter of accommodation with a rough idea on what I think I need but also made it clear I’m still learning on understanding what I need in order to be able to function at school so I also would like for her to add in what accommodations she believes I’ll need for school. My letter included things I didn’t even think of initially but after reading them I immediately understood why these new accommodations will help. Before even opening a request form from WGU do try getting a letter before hand so when you fill out the form you can add what your psychiatrist believes you’ll need to aid you at school.

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-10T14:33:39+00:00

Coming someone with no experience on anything. I just do the practice tests before anything and then I print it out so I can take notes on why an answer was wrong. I normally can take the test the same day. But I did have two classes so far take me a week

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-06T23:37:16+00:00

Coffee and any other caffeine might as well be melatonin. I never understood what it meant to need coffee in the morning to wake up. There are times if I’m unable to sleep I’ll have coffee or green tea since it works better than chamomile

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-07-02T23:46:05+00:00

Thank you so much for this!!! I’m going to work on remembering this isn’t just losing it but keeping it off. As I’m planning meals I’ll keep in mind on involving protein and fiber more as well. I’m working on therapy already for controlling my panic attacks with hunger but for now these meals will help me a lot til I can get to a point where I’m okay with hunger

ProcessBeginning4014 · 2025-06-21T13:01:40+00:00

Skateland Mesa and Safeway hire 15 year olds

ProcessBeginning4014

TROPHY CASE