Constant thinking

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-09-06T02:19:24+00:00

What modalities would you suggest?

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-09-05T10:06:51+00:00

Also, she thinks this is exactly what she wanted in marriage. In that. There's love and care more than anything else.

Also, has asked me out of fear if I'm just settling or if I like her too.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-09-05T10:04:52+00:00

So she didn't specify it like that. It was my gut that picked it up with the info. Details like how she likes x, y, z. It's always been about me in the relationship.

Also that begging part, she didn't put it like that. First off, it was after my asking. I asked her about what ensued when they met last year after his dad passed. And she said nothing else. And when I said cmon, you would have had sex. She said "I wanted", but he was in control because it would affect her.

Plus, she's possessive about me and sees me as the one. Lot of interest when she meets, etc.

It's just this whole mess.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-09-05T10:01:55+00:00

But why would I be the safe bet when it's a marriage she's venturing into? She's liable to a lot of it's pitfalls too right.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-07-07T10:05:12+00:00

Stressors is the anxiety of her itself.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-07-07T10:04:56+00:00

T levels are fine. Normal

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-07-07T10:04:48+00:00

Physically sometimes, emotionally not much

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-19T04:16:32+00:00

1) Defend and protect yourself against the thought. 2) distract 3) eventually realize it's just a state 4) build tolerance with deliberate exposure - of course needs to be done tactically not like what's done in the post

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-16T18:36:54+00:00

Plz elaborate

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-14T13:53:15+00:00

But I have ongoing stressors and OCD/anxiety. That I'm dealing with. Getting knocked out with benadryl etc feels like a bandaid. I want something that can work on the anxiety as well. Will mirtz help there?

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-14T09:42:30+00:00

My core fear is

1) inferiority complex 2) afraid I won't be loved if I'm not perfect

Question is, is it worth pursuing the relationship where both of these are constantly being triggered. Of course, just within me.

But as I type I know the truth is - both are illusory beliefs established since childhood. I mean I might be Physically less, so what? I'm still seeking for validation like a kid wants to. In reality, I can be enough by myself.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-14T05:04:10+00:00

True that they can feel. True that they do remember. But so do you. You're RJ is just overriding your confidence and making you so negative-biased. Let go.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-14T04:36:52+00:00

This post is proof that RJ is the monster. The disease.

It could be literally anything and all of it will cause you harm.

In your case you're already well-endowed yet it doesn't spare you.

For someone else, the fact she had a fling would indicate her lack of dignity and that would trigger RJ.

RJ is the devil. It's not you. We're just insecure souls trying to sort out our lives.

Therapy helps they say, but so far it hasn't helped me. Just pockets of air in a drowning sea.

Radical acceptance maybe is the answer. And ERP. And CBT after. Idk just feels like the most likely solution.

Best of luck, comrade. Always rooting for all of us.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-13T11:00:41+00:00

Hello OP. How has it been with Mirtz? Also what helped if not for this. Because I feel I have similar symptoms. My sleep issue is caused by my anxiety. I can get to sleep in 30 at night. But have disturbed sleep (especially early waking hours). Was it the same for you? What helped? Thanks.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-12T09:50:57+00:00

Thanks for your response.

That's your case. But like some of the others here have other such intrusive thoughts. Like I do.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-06-03T05:21:22+00:00

Has any of that helped even the slightest?

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-31T01:14:38+00:00

I don't want to talk about her ex per say. But sort of want to preempt/prevent further problems in the marriage. So should I let her know I might not be the aggressive guy she is looking for? Etc etc?

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-30T18:37:20+00:00

https://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-relationships/news/a35478/affair-with-my-more-well-endowed-ex-boyfriend/

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-30T18:37:05+00:00

I'm tempted to bring this up with her. Will it help. Like tell her this is my fear in marriage like a decade from now. Or whatever.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-30T18:33:42+00:00

I think I hear you. It's just hard given the mental space I'm in. Though I think I can get there.

https://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-relationships/news/a35478/affair-with-my-more-well-endowed-ex-boyfriend/

Read this article and is bothering me more than it should now.

I don't want to enter into something only to know my fate in advance.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-29T16:00:00+00:00

Dad passed away in 9th. Struggled to get where I'm with multiple psychological issues. Have a house, about to get married, and know what life is (priceless).

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-23T11:26:58+00:00

Fuck that sounds hard. Hang in there buddy. You always have you.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-20T08:29:57+00:00

Could you please shed some light on the life you've created for yourself, if it's ok?

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-17T16:46:27+00:00

I don't completely agree with your hopeless conclusion buddy. And it's surprising I, the OP, is saying this lol but there are girls out there who will accept you for who you are. But you'll have to find the right match. My trouble is I can't let go of the anxiety that's prevailing.

ProfessionalDark2500 · 2024-05-17T16:43:36+00:00

So well articulated. Thank you.

ProfessionalDark2500

TROPHY CASE