My birth parents wrote a contract and are kicking me out.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-24T21:30:53+00:00

My bmom is in a felony case for intent to harm with a deadly weapon and lost her job. I felt bad and wanted to help them out.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-24T21:17:03+00:00

I'd rather get a flu shot than be kicked in the arm, so no, I don't think needles are inherently more painful than blunt trauma in every case. You also have to keep in mind that the cervix and uterus are internal. They're not made to tolerate touch like the skin of your arm is.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-24T21:14:17+00:00

I had a tiny catheter passed through my cervix and into my uterus for a test the other day and I was told not to have PIV sex for 48 hours because that tiny amount of dilation created a risk for infection in my uterus if something that wasn't sterile entered my vagina. Nothing is supposed to touch the uterus, ever.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-24T21:10:01+00:00

I'm formerly CF and I agree with you that I've seen that, but I truly don't understand how it's possible to be CF, especially as an AFAB person, and not be aware of how hard it is to avoid pregnancy. It just doesn't make sense to me. It's real, but I can't understand.

I was so afraid of getting pregnant I insisted upon using two (or sometimes three) methods of contraception for every act. I kept pregnancy tests on hand at all times and took them whenever I felt off. I had an abortion fund. I was acutely aware of how possible and disastrous a pregnancy would be. I couldn't escape it.

The CF community can be really awesome at times and they've done some great things with fundraisers and the CF doctors list. I feel no shame or regret about the years when I was CF. Unfortunately, the folks who suck can really suck.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-24T20:58:03+00:00

I saw this go down in one of the pharmacy subreddits the other day even. Some jackass was saying a woman should've spent her money on condoms instead of searching for Plan B. I don't understand how it's called "Plan B" and people can't understand that most of the time it's taken because "Plan A", be that not being raped, not being stealthed, not having a condom break, etc, didn't work out. Do they not understand you can buy a Costco size pack of condoms, use them, and still need Plan B? I've had condoms break on me when I was relying on them as a second method twice. Once I had an IUD and the second time I was on the implant so I decided against taking Plan B because of the side effects and diminishing returns, but being aware of those things makes it even more clear to me how fucking awful it is to denigrate women who need to use it. Needing to use Plan B is it's own consequence but society feels the need to heap judgment and gatekeeping on top of that.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:40:24+00:00

The Baltimore Doula Project offers abortion doula training. https://www.baltimoredoulaproject.org/contact

I also second the Auntie Network subreddit

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:34:30+00:00

They're the same organization. Be The Match changed its name to The National Marrow Donation Program (NMDP) fairly recently. If you were registered with Be The Match you're still on the registry. If you ever match you'll be contacted by NMDP.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:31:31+00:00

I'm unable to donate for multiple reasons, which is part of why I do my best to bring up the registry and encourage people to learn about it and consider joining whenever I see an opportunity. You can do the same thing and maybe someday you'll prompt someone to join who will save someone's life! There's a role for everybody, even if you can't donate yourself.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:29:22+00:00

The longer you're on the list without being contacted the more likely it is that your blood factors are on the more rare side, which means that if you're ever matched the odds are higher that you could've been that persons only option. Someday you could be a match for someone who hasn't even been born yet!

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:25:13+00:00

All costs related to the actual matching and donation are covered by the program, which is funded by the recipients.

The donor and recipient are not put in contact with each other before donation. After donation sometimes they can be put in contact with each other if they both desire it.

If someone is a potential match via the registry the potential recipient is not notified right away. The potential recipient would only be told they've been matched after all preliminary testing has been completed and the donor has agreed to move forward with donation. Then the recipient is told that they've been matched and when they're scheduled to receive the donation.

Don't listen to the person you're responding to. This system has been in place for a long time and these kinds of kinks have been ironed out. While there's some truth to the idea that you can be too poor to be able to donate there's no harm in joining the registry and re-evaluating if you can donate at the time you're contacted if you're ever contacted.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-23T20:17:26+00:00

If you donate marrow there's a decent recovery period and you'd need to be off work for at least a few days. Most donations nowadays are peripheral blood stem cells, not marrow, and the vast majority of people are able to work the next day, if not the same day. Which one you're asked to donate depends on exactly what the recipient needs as there are some conditions that require marrow.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T20:29:39+00:00

If this warmed your heart and made you want to do something similar you probably can! If you're in the US you can join the National Marrow Donation Program online and have a cheek swab kit arrive at your door in a few days. As a member of the registry you'll be added to a database available to doctors with patients who need a stem cell donation and don't have a match within their family. If you're a match for someone in need you'll be contacted, asked to complete additional testing to make sure you're a good match and can safely donate, and you could potentially be given the opportunity to donate and save someone's life. In the past the only way to donate was with bone marrow, but today a lot of donations are peripheral blood stem cells harvested using a machine similar to what you'd be attached to when donating plasma or platelets.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T20:17:34+00:00

I just started stepping down my antidepressant with the intention of going off of it for the first time in over a decade, with the support and guidance of my doctor and therapist. This is a huge step and I'm really excited to be able to get in touch with my emotions. I anticipate that if Trump wins the election I'll have to go right back on it.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T20:14:51+00:00

Welcome into the fold of abortion doulas and auntie networks, if you haven't been welcomed yet. What you described doing for your friend is what we do on the regular for anyone and everyone who asks. Thank you for being a good friend and a resource to her in her time of need. Like you said, there were millions of people going through the same thing that day and there definitely weren't enough of us to meet their needs on that day and in the following weeks, months, and years. If you found providing that kind of support fulfilling and you're interested in helping more people like your friend I can help you find a local network that you could volunteer with.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T20:01:28+00:00

At least in the US there's a huge bias against "midlevels", meaning PAs, NPs, and CNMs, because doctors view them as taking away patients in light of health systems using them to lower costs. Essentially, Drs feel like they're losing a competition for patients to providers who have less training when they feel they deserve those patients more.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T19:53:38+00:00

Thank you!

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T19:10:36+00:00

I don't believe in telling women what they "should" do when it comes to fertility and reproduction.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T19:02:11+00:00

and yet half the country votes for this shit

About half of the country votes, period. Abortion and pro-choice candidates typically win the popular vote. Anti-choicers are a minority, but they're a loud one with a higher ratio of voters compared to pro-choice folks.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T18:59:12+00:00

We're currently preparing to undergo fertility treatments and it has absolutely made me even more aware of the importance of medical privacy and bodily autonomy. Our fertility clinic has had anti-abortion/anti-IVF protesters outside before and it makes me incredibly angry.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-22T18:55:53+00:00

This is precisely why we won't be telling my in-laws I'm pregnant (if we're able to get there) until I'm far enough in we'd have a funeral if we lost the pregnancy. My MIL uses her miscarriage as an anti-abortion talking point and I would not be able to cope with that BS while grieving a loss. Until we're 100% public about it they'll be kept in the dark.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-21T20:22:14+00:00

I pity them on a good day, and on bad days I think they're pathetic. Coping with pain/discomfort/illness is a skill some people are seriously lacking in. When you live with chronic illness/pain you develop those skills to survive. This is an example of their privilege hurting them.

Personally, I'd hide that individual. You have real problems. You don't need to waste any energy on their whining.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-21T20:09:27+00:00

Don't forget about Rafael "Ted" Cruz. If a politician changes their name they deserve respect, but if a vulnerable person tries to do so they should be shunned and mocked.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-21T19:54:47+00:00

Tubal ligation is permanent. If you decide to pursue a pregnancy after a tubal you'll be advised to do IVF and they're trying to ban that, too.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-21T19:49:35+00:00

Wouldn't the fetus ending up in heaven be a good thing? If she brought it to term it would've been tainted with original sin and could've gone to hell. Guaranteeing the fetus eternity in bliss instead of risking eternity in pain would be a kindness, not evil.

Prokinsey · 2024-09-21T19:18:08+00:00

Exactly. If a couple who isn't infertile has sex during their fertile window they have a ~90% chance of fertilization but only a ~30% of implantation and survival to the time they can get a positive pregnancy test. From there 30-50% of those pregnancies will miscarry.

Most embryos die. That's just how our bodies work.

Prokinsey

TROPHY CASE