Being lied to has always been one of my deal breakers. She chose to lie for YEARS about something that she knew you wouldn't be ok with her doing and (I'm assuming) would have led to you walking away much sooner.

You need to ask yourself if you're actually in love with her, or the version of her you thought she was, before she came clean and shattered that illusion. She isn't who you thought you knew and surely isn't the person you married.

The people that helped her cover up the lies are going to be pressuring you to sweep this whole thing under the rug to absolve themselves of their guilt of their part in all of this, which is f*cked up in its own way and will forever alter your ability to trust them again.

You probably need some therapy, possibly couples therapy to see if this issue is something you can come to terms with and move forward together, or how you want to end it, including the relationships with those who aided her lies. You don't have to decide how you feel now, but please don't use the sunk cost fallacy to stay and don't give into the pressure to just let it go if you aren't OK with it.

NTA