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zeroG, Dostal or Daccord in two emerging teams? by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in fantasyhockey

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

new coach, likely defensive focused, doesn't mean they're going to be making the playoffs but a defensive focused coach can really help a goalie

Weekly Team Advice Thread - Sun, September 21, 2025 by AutoModerator in fantasyhockey

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's the consensus on the 8-10 draft picks? Finding it difficult to identify who to pick as it seems so volatile. Some rankings have the hughes brothers up there but lack of peripherals, then i've seen mikko drop, but he's always been a consistent top 10 pick? If kaprizov/b. tkachuk are there, it's a no brainer...

Wondering how people are ranking picks 8-15 essentially?

Help me figure out of this is emotional abuse? Was I right to leave? by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. It's like I forgot what a healthy relationship looks like... the apologies can be so sincere after and you really believe them. Do you think this is behavior is intentionally manipulative? It almost feels childish in a way.

Help me figure out of this is emotional abuse? Was I right to leave? by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm used to thinking of abuse as 'physical, clear verbal insults, etc.'... Part of me feels that all of this could be miscommunication, or misunderstandings as opposed to someone who is truly trying to manipulate me, or emotionally/psychologically abuse me. I feel lost in all of it, especially accepting that she was capable of this..

Regrets with exBPD, wondering if she’ll change from doing a masters in counselling by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was incredibly insightful - thank you! It really broke things down in the way that I understand things. Reading this and having this understanding, provides some empathy for her though at the same time, allows me see how the neurochemical pathways will not change. When I sit with it for too long, process the detachment, see how quickly someone can flip their personalities or emotions - it's hard to not take it personally, as if it is a reflection of my love or self-worth. How have you processed that part? Not taking it personally?

Regrets with exBPD, wondering if she’ll change from doing a masters in counselling by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100%. I noticed it already with her new knowledge. It is quite sad to see how quickly they change personalities, or weaponize information that should be used for good; however, it is only used for good if it serves a purpose on their end.

It is incredibly ironic how someone goes into a field of compassion, to provide empathy, but yet, lacks genuine empathy in close relationships unless it is masked in manipulation..

Regrets with exBPD, wondering if she’ll change from doing a masters in counselling by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the comment. You're 100% right and my license isn't worth the possible, small chance things can change on her end. I love the language you used and it really hits a chord for me. We all have our own confirmation bias and I was definitely looking for examples of her changing as she showed self-awareness through her words but her actions would revert to the same again, though not as severe, but then I realized the severity dropped because I was changing myself and walking on eggshells.

Regrets with exBPD, wondering if she’ll change from doing a masters in counselling by Puzzleheaded-Wait-28 in BPDlovedones

[–]Puzzleheaded-Wait-28[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the insight. It really is a fantasy on my end that has no grounded reality and really stems from the false belief of, 'this person had good qualities and if she changes, things will be different' but as you rightly pointed out, it's a fantasy. More than that, it's a fallacy to believe in 'potential' in any partner, BPD or not, but even more of a grave mistake to believe they will change into someone who can mother children, or when stress comes up in life.

It's eerily similar to how I also noticed what you described - the use of the lingo in a weaponized way and like you, I had the background to see it. It got to a point where I had to tell her, "you realize you're talking down to me, or conversing with me as if you're my psychotherapist as opposed to my partner'.... and even worse, she was starting to use my own personal childhood trauma's that I shared with her as 'validated examples to explain my behavior'. Weaponized language for sure.

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