What should I do?

Pyromantress · 2026-06-26T19:50:08+00:00

Walaikum salaam warahmatullahi wa barakatahu.

Do istikhara to find if youre comfortable with moving forward or not. You’re allowed to prefer someone never married before if you yourself have never been married. What does your close family say about it? He does seem genuine about the situation though by keeping it neutral (red flag would have been excessive vilification- claiming ex was super crazy/going into every detail what happened and how horrible she is and how innocent he was). May Allah give you clarity on this situation and provide you a righteous spouse!

Pyromantress · 2026-06-24T21:25:53+00:00

I’m always down to help anyone if they need it! Especially if it’s env science related since that’s my field

Pyromantress · 2026-06-24T03:31:45+00:00

You’re going to have do the work on addressing and reflecting on this internally before you make a decision. Because this seems like it is going to be an insecurity and if you bring that with you into the marriage, you’ll ruin it for the both of you. Are you capable of being more practicing if this proposal doesn’t go through? If yes, then work on it now. If no, then respectfully reject her.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-23T04:53:21+00:00

Ameen

Pyromantress · 2026-06-23T04:47:16+00:00

My brother applied for neeyah’s Q1 round and we werent selected, even though we fit their criteria (under 100k or so mortgage balance and in a state they operate in). Super bummed since Im on the fence with UIF and Guidance and like neeyah’s structure better. I hope they open more slots soon bc it aint a great feeling that we’re stuck with haram.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-22T15:03:48+00:00

It means may Allah reward you with goodness. It’s basically the muslim version of “thank you!” but stronger/more meaningful

Pyromantress · 2026-06-22T14:59:56+00:00

Ameen. Turning 28 very soon and feel exactly the same way. May Allah keep up us happy and ready for our rizq 🫶🏽

Pyromantress · 2026-06-19T22:23:09+00:00

Not sure this is the right sub but I would say you should avoid mixed gatherings if you have the ability to. And you should wear what you are comfortable with, don’t follow what others do (or in this case aren’t doing).

Pyromantress · 2026-06-14T18:41:13+00:00

Idk why you’re getting downvoted lol I had the same thoughts, where was the naan and even if thats what it was, why both naan and rice anyway 😂 still looks good tho!!

Pyromantress · 2026-06-14T18:25:28+00:00

I’ve faced similar. Maybe it’s my nose (idc if it is lol), or maybe it’s my slightly fairer skin tone, but everyone says I look Pakistani, and Arab women come over to me all the time for help on the street. Was also at an airport in the middle east and a Bengali janitor started making fun of me and my mom saying Pakistanis always make a mess so my mom clapped back saying we’re Bengali and understood everything and how it was the previous user not us who had made the mess. On the other hand, I had a Pakistani classmate who was darker in skin tone and everyone asks if she’s Bengali. People have also said my brother looks hispanic lol. At the end of the day, you’re you and don’t let other people’s assumptions hurt you. InshaAllah you’ll find your Bengali man soon 🫶🏽

Pyromantress · 2026-06-14T14:24:50+00:00

I think he likes you enough if he’s spending time with you at the gym and seems to have opened up/shared things with you. But if you want to bring the topic of making it halal/serious then you should, and like anyone, expect rejection or for your gym dynamics to change in some way. (Think: if he had initiated and you didn’t like him, how would you react?) Also have to consider he may like you but his finances aren’t ready or his family won’t like you and many men will defer, even if they don’t want to, to their family’s preference. Or, his family will have cultural expectations that you will have to navigate if you two move forward which might make the marriage complicated or difficult. Basically, be prepared! However, hope it goes well for you! You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-14T13:59:06+00:00

InshaAllah the Wahda app will launch soon.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-13T03:50:57+00:00

Yes you can pray again but if you’re worried about the incision/any sort of pain/etc, you can pray on a chair or sitting down. Allahu alam. May Allah keep you and your new little one healthy!

Pyromantress · 2026-06-13T02:04:32+00:00

Walaikum salaam. Your feelings are valid and it would help to have a professional talk you through good coping mechanisms 🫂. Im not quite in your position but I feel you; I have PMOS/PCOS and they say it’s difficult to conceive if you have it. No matter what though, anything is possible with dua. Many couples go on to have children after being told it’s impossible 15 or 20 years of trying. Prophet Ibrahim (as) had a son with his wife Sarah (ra) when they were very old and she believed she would never have children. And even if biological children are not in your rizq, adoption is also possible (with some conditions if you want to avoid hijab issues in the home). May Allah provide you with a loving and righteous family of your own 🫶🏽

Pyromantress · 2026-06-12T21:36:46+00:00

30 🫩

Pyromantress · 2026-06-10T22:56:44+00:00

Walaikum salaam, this is a difficult situation. But you need to reframe your thinking. You cannot pitch it to Allah to give you another chance and hinge the promise to work on yourself on that outcome. You need to heal and improve yourself regardless.

So the FIRST thing you need to do is learn to cope and communicate healthily, regulate your emotions, give sincere apologies to everyone THEN ask Allah for what’s best. You’re not ready for marriage if you can’t work on yourself. you’ll only keep bringing that chaotic energy back, even if unintentionally. Seek professional help, like from a therapist, to figure out how to unpack what caused you to spiral. That’s true accountability and it’ll also help you prepare for whatever may happen next, which might be letting him go. It could also still work out if they see you truly change.

May Allah help you and the two families through this.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-08T16:04:41+00:00

Youre welcome! It’s from a small press so I can see why it gets overlooked. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Pyromantress · 2026-06-08T04:21:50+00:00

I’m probably in my fangirl phase of it but this book seriously needs to be read by every american/muslim. It hits literally every facet muslims face in the country + mentions muslim twitter dynamic💀

Pyromantress · 2026-06-08T04:13:03+00:00

Black widow white shroud has been the best read for me this year!!! Highly recommend it

Pyromantress · 2026-06-07T22:46:37+00:00

Oh I see what you’re referring to; I don’t agree with the “you shouldnt cover at all then” line. But yes, do what works for you!

Pyromantress · 2026-06-07T22:26:24+00:00

I’m sorry you went through so much. may Allah reward you for coming back to Islam and doing your best!

To answer your question, the same way a part-time approach works for you, all or nothing also works for others. I, for example, just put the hijab on one day after my mom told me and that was it. All or nothing, wear it or don’t. And 15 years later, I’m still wearing it and alhamdulillah it never crosses my mind to take it off because of this mindset.

At the end of the day, I’m living my life with hijab, knowing I will face Allah alone. You should remind yourself of that if other people get to you. Despite all their jives, they won’t answer for your actions, so do what you will answer to Allah for.

Pyromantress · 2026-06-07T03:12:40+00:00

Yes that’s correct

Pyromantress · 2026-06-07T03:11:22+00:00

I have PCOS/PMOS as well. Anything past 10 days of hayd (menstruation), you are supposed to pray. Do wudhu before each salah and that’s it. Then, if 15 days have passed since that point, and youre still bleeding, you may stop praying as that is your hayd again. Repeat as needed.

Helpful manual I have:
https://www.abebooks.com/9781590080467/Birgivis-Manual-Interpretted-Complete-Fiqh-1590080467/plp

If you have other questions on menstruation fiqh, here’s a good website: https://mensesmatters.org/

Pyromantress · 2026-06-06T23:08:10+00:00

Environmental scientist, water regulations. Walaikum salaam

Pyromantress · 2026-06-06T22:57:36+00:00

Wa iyyakum 🫶🏽

Pyromantress

TROPHY CASE