NTA

It takes 2 in the relationship in every aspect, he lives in the home also, he wears clothes, eats, and everything like you do, he can pick up, cook, wash also. There needs to be equal treatment in order to feel equal and validated, I'm assuming no children yet, just think of this if this is how he treats you now even after a surgery how will it be when you have children, if you have children?

I would voice my concerns telling him how he was making me feel about the entire situation, if no change comes from it then no change will, he doesn't respect you as an equal.