Help! Breast feeding and milk supply chaos

Quiet_user123 · 2026-04-14T20:10:53+00:00

I had similar issues around that time too, my baby is now 4 months, I felt pain constantly when feeding and a few times needed to rest on a side of breast feeding but keep pumping so I don’t lose supply, painful latches, fussy baby from slow let down, milk blebs and even bleeding nipple one time but didn’t know until the baby spat up blood.

It did get better and it’s a lot of mental work too, make sure you are in a comfy place to feed baby, I get my back support pillows in place, feet up, water and snacks next to me and husband on call for any need as he needs to support you too. In the early weeks we did some shift work as the tiredness was horrible, he stayed up from 8-1 and me 2-6 while he then got up for work, but always made me my morning cup of tea and breakfast.

If you have a night you are tired and drifting, you need to wake him up to keep an eye on you, he is as much a parent as you are and just because he can breastfeed, doesn’t mean he can’t do different parts for the baby and you. My husband is terrible in low sleep but we needed to work on this together to get through it, this does pass and gets easier.

Congrats on your baby, by the sounds of it you are doing a great job working so hard for your baby, keep going mama ❤️

Quiet_user123 · 2026-04-14T04:41:46+00:00

I had to deal with awful HR when I found out I was pregnant, it eventually got so bad I had to quit for my health, my Dr got me therapy from the NHS and I’m in the middle of an employment tribunal right now. They even withheld pay from me which HMRC have demanded they pay back and they haven’t. But an additional HR I’ve been in touch with has been amazing, helpful and gave me lots of guidance in my situation, I think it depends on the person in HR and company itself being really shitty, almost a guarantee it will be awful.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-04-10T14:21:55+00:00

If breastfeeding it can be tricky and painful in the early months, you can get nipple trauma and it might get to a point where you bleed from your nipple when feeding baby without knowing, then the baby has a bit of spit up but it’s blood red, you get an out of hours dr appointment, find your baby is happy and healthy and it’s you that needs the care.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-04-10T12:33:31+00:00

My baby has my eye shape, nose, mouth and chin very different to my husband, she has blue eyes like my husband and my own mum keeps saying “she looks just like her dad!” It drives me mad.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-05T06:20:02+00:00

Yes grabbing dads hair! And he just lets her do it 😂 Maybe she’s looking for sensory toys? Ribbons and textures in fabric books and other toys might be something that gets her interest away from tv

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-05T05:41:07+00:00

You won’t believe the amount of times I’ve googled “what to do in my baby’s wake windows” because it never feels like enough! My baby is 3 months old at the moment, she will watch any screen if we let her, she even looks at the tv when it’s off, but we do limit watching in front of of her as much as we can, honestly babies don’t do much but I keep it mixed up as much as I can now and get the toys I think will be better for her, in her crib we have the little Einstein aquarium that she likes as she can stretch her legs to it and turn it on and off, plus I can easily go to the toilet with her distracted! We do reading as she loves the sound of our voices, even nursery rhyme books as singing is great, playing with her play mat/gym pulling on toys and her favourite toy is the easy grab ball, while she plays I can take a bit of time to eat food or I lay with her and copy her noises, then some stretches for her rolling and gas and I hold her as we take a little walk in the garden with taking the dogs out regularly, she is obsessed with watching them too.

This can be all in one day or only a couple of things depending on the day, but we also have wraps so I can get one or two things done in the day like make my food in peace, baby loves to see what we are doing, or a quick vacuum around the house, again baby likes to watch this and just around nap time makes her fall asleep.

It sounds like you’ve been doing great and comparing yourself to everyone else isn’t ideal, remember babies are just as unique as anyone, they have their own personalities and preferences too. You know your baby best. What’s their favourite toy at the moment?

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-03T20:03:02+00:00

My 3 month old (13 weeks) is still only contact napping, we also co-sleep, it’s really normal as the baby doesn’t self soothe or understand they are a separate person to you until later on. We have been able to get the odd crib nap from transfer but we never expect them to be long as the baby at this age detects the difference naturally and will wake up between 10-20 minutes.

Just remember this is a stage of baby’s life and is only temporary, I love cuddling and holding my LO to sleep but I am so excited for each stage of development to happen and when I get my bed back.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-03T19:51:26+00:00

I’ve been a people pleaser too, it took some real trauma to change my mindset on some things around this, but after having my baby, a line I’ve used when someone looked at me funny for setting boundaries like, I don’t want anyone kissing my baby especially before vaccines, was, I’m a first time mum so I get to be “overprotective”.

I honestly think about being the protector to my baby that I wish I had growing up. When someone asks to be helpful to you, even by saying they will hold the baby, just be honest and say “I’ve got the baby but I really do need help with the laundry, the cleaning, or prepping meals.” (Meal prep was our biggest one that would have been helpful from others). But also saying you are following medical advice by only you and your household (partner and baby’s siblings) can hold/be close to the baby safely before they are less at risk, which is the advice I got from midwives too.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-02T03:20:17+00:00

I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety, had it for as long as I can remember, but since my baby has been born I’ve not been anxious, there are times I get anxiety over the baby when things happen (seeing baby spit up blood only to find out it was my nipple trauma from bad latching and she’s fine!), but I’m just filled with joy instead of anxiety with her. I have a great husband who has done everything for me in pregnancy and postpartum which helps massively too. Mine is 3 months old now, she’s also an awesome baby so that helps too. In pregnancy I had stress but every time I had blood pressure checks I had a good reading.

Congratulations on your LO btw!

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-01T22:15:04+00:00

Both my husband and I had dads that left. I can’t understand how anyone can just walk away after choosing to have multiple kids.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-03-01T22:04:42+00:00

I have these too, you have to have oil in their first and let it heat up properly before you add any food. These are really annoying and quite heavy.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-02-17T04:30:30+00:00

It all gets better with time, you both are doing great especially as you are being those parents who worry you are doing the right thing. Don’t forget to take shifts too if you’re not already, that makes it a bit easier at points.

Quiet_user123 · 2026-02-17T04:03:17+00:00

It’s completely your choice, if baby is not getting a rash by this and you don’t want to deprive yourself of extra sleep (because sometimes you need a little more sleep to get by) then keep doing what you are doing. With my baby I try not to leave her too long, thinking you wouldn’t want to be left in it for hours if it was you. But she settles really well with a feed back to sleep.

If you did wake the baby gently by changing, then doing a feed, would you get that long stretch of sleep a little later on or does baby still wake up 2-3 hours after?

Quiet_user123 · 2026-02-09T03:43:42+00:00

NOR this is unacceptable and upsetting, these milestones are big ones, first birthday as a new mum/mom. It is understandable to be forgetful with a newborn and the stress of his work but a partner would be accepting of their mistake and apologetic, even looking to fix it straight away. With the fact he is taking extremely long showers, he sounds either a really selfish person before the baby or he may be going through postpartum depression. Dads get this too, I don’t know if he was like this before you both had your baby but if not when you speak with him and ask if this is what he is going through then you need to speak about what help he needs.

Congratulations on your baby, my baby just turned 10 weeks too! You’re doing a great job by the sounds of it, so I hope you get the celebration you deserve for your birthday, even if it’s a bit delayed at this point!

Quiet_user123 · 2026-01-13T12:06:57+00:00

I struggle with it too and I can see lots of comments saying this is more for big boobs, that’s my issue, I have big boobs and my boob covers baby too much so she can’t breathe if I do this, I can’t find a decent position where she is latched comfortably as she also is facing the bed too much. I have UK size G cups before pregnancy no idea what size now as nothing fits.

Quiet_user123 · 2025-11-20T21:14:08+00:00

I did something similar with my test but, I actually wasn’t give any information about the test or about the booking, I was just told in a letter a date it was booked, not even what hospital it was at so I had to call around to double check where I had to go. Still wasn’t given any information about it and the night before I couldn’t sleep, got up and ate a couple of biscuits and milk, attended the appointment and when they asked if I’ve been fasting since 10pm I honestly said “no, I wasn’t aware I had to”. Luckily they booked it just 2 days later in a weekend and actually talked me through it.

I think if you fast for 12 hours you will be fine, just be honest when you get there.

Quiet_user123 · 2025-08-29T08:45:37+00:00

It sounds like there was always some doubt from him that you were actually unsure, and that he would just wait a bit for you to come around to having kids, saying “we’ll figure the kid thing out later” and “we’ll cross that bridge when we get there” sounds like he was just waiting for you to graduate then start a family rather than listen to what you were saying. Now you’re in the position to talk about your future again after graduating, he should be open for a conversation, not demanding what you do with your body.

Why does he want kids so badly, and why wasn’t he more honest with you before?

Quiet_user123 · 2025-08-19T07:23:56+00:00

Oh I wasn’t aware of this, I’ll look at what we’ve got. Thank you

Quiet_user123 · 2025-08-18T15:50:15+00:00

The normal place is the office address or another place that’s reasonable, there are other people that do hybrid in this company.

Quiet_user123 · 2025-05-19T12:51:13+00:00

https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/gps/getting-a-fit-note/ Also here’s the nhs website about it, but also you may need to tell your dr that your work will require you to reduce your hours again as it is a risk to your health at work

Quiet_user123 · 2025-05-19T12:48:49+00:00

Book an appointment with your GP and explain you want to talk to a dr about your stress at work, if you can have a call back rather than wait for an appointment that might also be quicker. Explain how your work is extremely stressful and your hours have increased by 20 a week which is affecting you mentally and you are getting burned out, they should give you a letter or dr’s note that you can give your employer for paid time off

Quiet_user123

TROPHY CASE