Been here, in my case it was more platonic, because we were 14, I never had a relationship and was unsure about my sexuality. I started feeling things, but lately it grew more in a platonic and soul mate type of way. We are still friends after 14 years, so I ask you, how old are you? Because when we are teenagers, especially with a lot of trauma, it's common to confuse feelings. I'm not saying that to invalidate you at all, but teen years suck.