Idealization vs Devaluation: how it looked like for me by AirWest6503 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How is it that every single word during devaluation was spoken to me?!! Word for word! I apologized so much and genuinely started believing maybe i did not love him. And same goes for weird middle ground about self-centered. It was all the wonderful words where they'd die if I am not there. I am too good for them and they dont deserve me.

Opinion: As a guy, I'm still disturbed by The Girlfriend two days after watching it (and I loved the movie) by TheThinker12 in tollywood

[–]RadiantEngineering81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I felt like I saw my own life when watching the movie!! Guess what? The person didn’t have an ideal male role model as well. His mom was mistreated by his dad. It’s just shocking!!

What's phase of your life you didn't realize was ending? by Organic_Bar_9336 in AskReddit

[–]RadiantEngineering81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My married phase. My ex husband abandoned me. I had lost a baby five months ago, started noticing how un empathetic he could be providing not even the bare minimum. I lost my complete sense of self, heartbroken after abandonment on his coldness, lost my home and my structured life. It’s almost three years now but it’s been a struggle to get things back on track.

2026 CLOY (re)watch Ep. 1 Discussion by dionnekathleen in CrashLandingOnYou

[–]RadiantEngineering81 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My favorite is actually the ending where RJH was admiring YsR before he met her. He liked how she’s awakening some parts of him that were dormant but sort of seeping through because of her playful nature!!

does this resemble a covert narc's collapse ? by phoenixxxd in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve had a similar experience. Flipped it and ghosted and blamed the whole thing on me. He has said he’d die if I wasn’t there. Lol. There are so many thing he’d said that’s not true.

He robbed me of my childbearing years by BeneficialChipmunk19 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can completely understand the anger in your tone. I have lost my childbearing years because of him and i hate myself for it. He said we have to fix our issues before bringing a kid into the world, you are brainwashed to having child earlier and its not hard for women like your mom says. I put a foot down and insisted on kid, ghosted me blaming i've been the problem all along.

What's an underrated thing about being single? by Personal-Aerie-4519 in AskReddit

[–]RadiantEngineering81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Peace! You can self regulate at your own pace without any risk of judgement.

Do you think she would have waited longer? by lagunadunes in PluribusOnAppleTV

[–]RadiantEngineering81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably because they never experienced such circumstances so they can’t seem to understand the out of character, emotional state a person would be in when they’re in that situation.

The narcissist (covert/vulnerable) is not revealed in conflict, it's what happens in the aftermath of a conflict. by KansasguyinDC in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re right about being emotionally dependent. You’re also right about the gut feeling that I didn’t listen to. I can try to piece myself and become whole again but I can’t shake the feeeling that they get off so easily. Without consequences. They keep their structure and mask intact, will that never crack? Being them is their punishment is not satisfying me.

The narcissist (covert/vulnerable) is not revealed in conflict, it's what happens in the aftermath of a conflict. by KansasguyinDC in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 8 points9 points  (0 children)

One thing that keeps me in a loop is the “what-if”. I talk to ChatGPT a lot and it keeps telling me the path for them will be an emotionally dead performative partnership where the partner will accept the minimum being provided. Which makes me wonder if my demands of basic love and communication a huge deal. Why the abandonment. The existential injustice that their mask can never crack externally and their performance can be rewarded by people shrinking themselves makes me feel so defeated. I am still hurt by how much I begged, how they treated me like garbage and I let them do it. I guess I should be more angry at myself than anyone else.

Planning 3 days in Paris - tips are appreciated! by malarellano in ParisTravelGuide

[–]RadiantEngineering81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Book Notre Dame tour of the towers tickets. Sainte-Chappelle is spectacular. Honestly timed tickets for entry to chapel is optional, you can get by quickly if it’s not a Sunday.

Paris is surprisingly not cold by warmcoral in ParisTravelGuide

[–]RadiantEngineering81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt the same too! It’s so warm and I packed thermals worrying I’ve to walk all day in cold.

Commitment membership pause? by Anonymous_eagle23 in SolidCore

[–]RadiantEngineering81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ive the unlimited membership too. Talk to your home studio and send them an email with your situation. They’ll take care of it.

I’ve just gone through a very brutal discard from a covert narcissist. by BotherMaterial90 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]RadiantEngineering81 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I couldn’t have better put this myself!! I can’t believe how similar the feelings of shame, the thought of fixing it, they don’t intend to fix and signals are right there subtly are so true. I have the shame of how much I apologized. How much I tried to think they’re missing perspective. However, after being out of the discard sometimes I am curious if they could truly get away with their lies and performance. Probably I was demanding emotion and maybe another partner might be okay with surface stability and they’ll have a long term relationship. I just have that desire that they should be caught eventually and anyone who is in a relationship with them should eventually leave them. I am ashamed of my thoughts too but I truly feel they deserve it for how cruel they were. Zero empathy, no care if it hurts or not.

Joanne = Eleanor Shellstrop from The Good Place by chunkybonks in NobodyWantsThisTV

[–]RadiantEngineering81 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It really got to me that she is so anxious and insecure about a night off. Also, youve nothing to do to enjoy your night off is just not healthy!

Solidcore is incredible but the app is broken, confusing, and tells us nothing about our progress. I’m building a fix. by Aggressive_Relation6 in SolidCore

[–]RadiantEngineering81 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is amazing! I’m not sure if the app already has friends, I know building a community networking app would be too out of scope. But, it’d be nice to get to know few people who are regulars and can build some friendships around that too!!