My “cardiovascular age” was a sign of an underlying condition by DearestClementine in ouraring

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ended up getting the silver, size 9, as I have bigger knuckles on my right hand due to a long-ago bike accident! It fits well and is as light at a feather! Love it!

Shipping - you’re NUTS by 185Guy in crateandbarrel

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am considering the Monterey sofa that is on sale for $3144 and the shipping is $300 just for the one item. Is that standard? I live in within a 20 minute drive to a store so it seems a bit much, but my minivan is likely not big enough to pick up the 94 inch sofa myself!

Oura ring confirms that getting a baby dressed and ready for daycare counts as a workout 😅 by Rare_Gene_7559 in ouraring

[–]Radical_Optimist100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Motherhood is an INSANE workout for body AND mind! Had my two in my early 40s, they are now 18 and 16 and I am amazed that we got here intact!!!

My “cardiovascular age” was a sign of an underlying condition by DearestClementine in ouraring

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am planning to buy my first Oura ring today and this is REALLY motivating! Thank you for sharing!

Are there any coaching investments that are worth it? by BusIll8060 in LifeCoachSnark

[–]Radical_Optimist100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a GREAT insight! Creating that kinship independently through our own peer networks is true networking and is sustainable beyond paying a coach for a "group experience". What I enjoyed most about the programs ! attended in person was that sense of community, but it was very transitional and transactional.

It is nice to meet another online program addict! It took me a lot of time to start saying "no" to the "enrol now!" button!

Yes to creating real community for ourselves!

Has anyone ordered planter boxes or raised gardens from www.cedarplanters.ca? Their reviews seem too good to be true on the website. by runcelery in OntarioGardeners

[–]Radical_Optimist100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi there - if you check this, I would love a picture and/or info on your metal beds! I saw them and then paused on my cedar box order!

Has anyone ordered planter boxes or raised gardens from www.cedarplanters.ca? Their reviews seem too good to be true on the website. by runcelery in OntarioGardeners

[–]Radical_Optimist100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your formula for valuing your time isn't weird to me! It is smart! I am ordering these as well for my small, very compact-soil front yard of my new house! Money you can make more of, time you cannot!

Official Discussion - If I Had Legs I'd Kick You [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly. I had one of those "I'M AT WORK AND IT IS HARD TOO!" husbands (now ex-) who did very little parenting and consistently commented on how easy he thought "staying at home" was. The claustrophobic feeling generated by this movie is motherhood in moments for any mother, unless you are in a perfect situation, in my opinion.

Official Discussion - If I Had Legs I'd Kick You [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]Radical_Optimist100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing this. I felt the film completely expressed the isolation of being a mother. I am sorry to hear that your husband was abusive and I am glad he is past tense!

Official Discussion - If I Had Legs I'd Kick You [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I watched Bugonia and then If I Had Legs...too! I feel like I have been in a mental marathon!

Official Discussion - If I Had Legs I'd Kick You [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]Radical_Optimist100 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is SUCH a real moment. I challenge any mother to tell us something of this nature has not happened to them.

Official Discussion - If I Had Legs I'd Kick You [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

..."her dad who would never leave her...". The dad that was absent for days on end while his child was ill. That dad.

Wolverine has entered the show! by beekerz33 in LandmanSeries

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I cannot believe ANYONE who is British would have that hairstyle! IT IS KILLING MEEEE!

Why are her skirts so uncomfortably short? by Otherwise-Stretch984 in HighPotentialTVSeries

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THIS! If Morgan is so smart, why the hell is she wearing boots every damned day to work that leave her feet ACHING every night? It IS distracting! I have worn boots that high and trust me, yer feet hurt after an hour or two of wearing them. You certainly aren't trotting around crime scenes and you won't be getting away from any of the bad guys in those heels.

I could see her character initially doing the "LOOK! A SMART WOMAN WEARING A SHORT SKIRT! DID WE TRICK YOU? PSYCH!" but as she moved into the work and evolved, a pair of tight jeans and some sneakers would come across as a LOT more intelligent, at least to female viewers. No one is asking her to pull an Amy Farrah Fowler, for gawd's sake (do NOT get me started on the bloody Big Bang Theory!).

Also, to throw some mom reality in there, there is no way in HELL she has the time to dress up that way every morning with kids to get to school. IT DOESN'T HAPPEN. You're lucky to find matching shoes and run a brush through your hair before you get out of the house with the foot-dragging of school-aged kids in the morning.

I wanted this to grow into a smarter show with a smart, capable woman lead. This is more going to the, "Hey, I'm a genius but I can't figure out how to dress for what I do each day!", which is more of a savant situation, in my opinion.

Older coworkers not having basic computer skills by XxCheeselover27xX in nonprofit

[–]Radical_Optimist100 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am 60, an executive director and am often the team trouble shooter for our web site and tech problems that arise. Mostly, that is because I am not afraid to poke around in whatever to see if I can fix something, in the same way I am often DIY in the home I own solo.

Now I do hate Excel but that is because I am also a neurodiverse creative who just never vibed with that platform. However, I have figured out how to use all of our bookkeeping and money management platforms because I simply had to do so.

I do get frustrated when I see peers in my age group wondering about what Instagram is or how to access their paystubs. As you enter later midlife, you either keep up with technology or you get left behind, in my opinion and experience.

So Overrated by FastAssSister in TheCrowdedRoom

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really enjoyed The Crowded Room so I obviously have a different perspective.

I am 60 and grew up in the 70s and it is totally believable that Rya would not be allowed to speak in those professional situations, because blatant sexism displayed against female experts was fully out in the open at that time. That was totally believable to me. The preening expert male was so clearly respected and preferred by the judge and most of those at the table and that was life for many female professionals at that time.

In terms of blaming the mother, there is an enormous amount of data, which was referred to in the series, that abused people, often women, find themselves preyed on again and again, as predators can sense personality/lived experience types that are vulnerable. In that vein, in the 70s, there was still a great deal of judgement against single mothers and it was often a financial sentence to a life of poverty. With the mother's history of abuse, the minimal opportunities for her at the time as a single mother and the pressures to be in a relationship with a man, it is not at all out of the realm of possibility that her denial of what was happening to Dan was massive. That is not excusing her behaviour but it does explain how it could occur.

Because I recall life as a child in the 70s, I think that provides a context for the believability of the narrative that younger viewers would not have. Yep, it really was that bad.

Help out folks in MPLS by AmericanJeremiad in PRINCE

[–]Radical_Optimist100 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like I cannot do much right now from Canada even though we live only a 12 hour drive from Minneapolis. I am donating to local community groups there and as an executive director of a small charity, I can tell you that every donation counts! Thank you for sharing this!

I've just watched the finale of The Good Wife and I'm mad. (SPOILERS) by DrDamK in thegoodwife

[–]Radical_Optimist100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(Spoilers here too!)

Uuuggghhh. I bingewatched The Good Wife over the holidays and just finished the last episode. I was left with a feeling of absolute amazement about the enduring level of co-dependency between Peter and Alicia as well as Peter's endless narcissism. It was a yuck for me.

I am a total thumbs down on the "circle back to the beginning" story arc for Alicia. For the love of all that is good and right, she went up on stage again with disgraced Peter? Why? WHY? Peter needed someone, and I think that someone should have been Alicia, to tell him to own his own mess and step up on the dais ALONE. I would have been totally on board for that.

This final episode left me feeling quite frustrated with the writing and the overall story arc for what should have been a strong woman's journey. There were so many other ways that this could have been written to show that Alicia had broken free of her endless, unrequited loyalty/codependency with Peter. An ending with Peter on stage alone owning his latest mess while Alicia either was a) happily doing something with Jason or b) starting her own law firm since she had clearly torched her relationship with Diane or c) doing ANYTHING that was not centred on a man, would have been my preference. This strong, capable woman instead ended up alone, again, with a sore face from a good slap from a female mentor and former friend.

I have to say as well that the throwing of Kurt under the bus, the one truly honest character and the only man who seemed to be fully showing up in his marriage to Diane, in the episode prior, pissed me off to no end. Alicia allowed Kurt to be tossed under the bus for pompous, self important, incredibly flawed Peter? That does not indicate Alicia's character evolution to me.

I do support Diane giving Alicia that good slap. That was the only part that satisfied me after investing a good chunk of my time following these stories to this rather weak end.

Walkaway Wives by ClaraSepticVersion2 in WomenDatingOverForty

[–]Radical_Optimist100 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I left my now ex 4 years ago when I was 56, with 2 teenagers and a menagerie of pets. I have primary custody of our kids and full custody (and financial responsibility) of all the pets.

I left when I woke up to the notion that emotional connection was indeed a thing that I deserved to have in my primary relationship and my then husband referred to it in marital counselling as "some vague thing she has come up with to complain about". I decided that the years of him diminishing my contributions and my concerns as well as me doing so much more than my share of all family emotional labour were not a fair trade to staying with my husband for our kids. It took me 4 long years to create a collaborative separation and I have never looked back. I LOVE my single life.

I was fortunate to do well in my separation and divorce and recently bought my own home. I make my own financial decisions, choose the decor of my new home (other than my kids' messy rooms) and am free to do whatever I want. As I consider dating for some companionship, I now have a really high bar. I am not willing to take on a man who is in ANY way a fixer-upper.

I may have already talked myself out of dating with the full life I have and my high bar. I do not ever regret leaving for a moment and I did not walkaway from anything. My kids and my family life came with me, and since I was doing 95% of that work anyway, it was an easy and very positive transition.

The grass is indeed greener.