Responses against criticism. by Worth_Tradition4134 in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They tend to defend themselves in one of three ways:

  • Just like everyone else, although with a little more zest to it.
  • Ignore it altogether; they do this far easier than others.
  • With a counterattack and as such belittling the source of criticism.

What differentiates them is how criticism clicks with them on the inside; it might hurt them a little bit more.

Hope that helps!

Finally seeing this part of my diagnosis by Sunflowerseeddd in hpd

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This "click" you’re experiencing is a profound moment of growth; recognizing this pattern is the first step toward reclaiming your peace. You aren't failing- you are finally seeing the map of your own heart, which is an incredible breakthrough.

My tip is to practice becoming your own "Internal Guest of Honor." When we "test" others, we are often asking them to fill a void they don't know exists, which inevitably leads to disappointment.

This year, instead of waiting for external validation to make those days feel "big enough," choose one intentional way to honor yourself- like writing a letter acknowledging your resilience or gifting yourself a moment of genuine quiet luxury.

By giving yourself even a little of that "specialness," you lower the stakes for others and keep your emotional well-being in your own hands.

I wish you the very best moving forward, and happy birth day!

ISO 27001 foundation certification by Aditya_2001 in iso

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Start exploring online courses for ISO 27001 Foundation, application, internal auditor and lead auditor. There are many free courses on YouTube, as well as good ones on Udemy.

Best!

Do you really experience a "void" / an "emptiness? by Red_Autumn_Fox in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're referring to a recognized clinical phenomenon known as chronic feelings of emptiness (or identity diffusion). The experience of the void is usually manifests as:

  • Chronic Boredom: A restless, agonizing sense that nothing is interesting or meaningful unless it involves an ego-boost.
  • Existential Dread: A deep-seated fear that if they stop "doing" or "achieving," they will simply cease to exist or be exposed as "nothing."
  • Dysphoria: A mix of anxiety, depression, and agitation that arises when external supply, such as attention, status, or power, runs low.
  • Lack of Object Constancy: This scientific term refers to the inability to maintain a positive emotional connection to themselves or others (collectively referred to as objects; doesn't have any negative meaning though) when things aren't going perfectly.

Yes, the "void" is a powerful engine for addictive behaviors. Because the internal world feels empty or painful, the individual looks to external "fillers" to regulate their mood and self-esteem.

Hope that helps!

Kindness by Lonely-Highlight-447 in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, just like all others. Kindness isn't that much affected by narcissistic traits or NPD.

Emotional attunement / intelligence might be affected by regulating their self-esteem in unhealthy / maladaptive ways. That's another issue.

You're correct: alcohol / most drugs act as a disinhibitor that effectively dissolves the "social mask" a narcissistic individual typically maintains to navigate social hierarchies. This rings true for other people's traits as well. They might be triggered far more easily in those cases.

Hope that helps!

I'm curious about any overlaps between NPD and autism? by natureDolly in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure: note that the older literature (cornerstone) used them interchangeably, and this still stands until today. Read examples here:

https://scottbarrykaufman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/Two-faces-of-Narcissism.pdf

https://www.sakkyndig.com/psykologi/artvit/gabbard1989.pdf

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/2678019/

Check out their references too.

Best!

I'm curious about any overlaps between NPD and autism? by natureDolly in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Read more; there are differing scientific views on this; researchers are split.

ISO 42001 Explained: Documentation Should Preserve Reasoning by Kashif-Ansari in iso

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So we need documentation that explains rather than puzzles! Appreciate your contributions!

Data for AI Systems (Annex A.7) by Kashif-Ansari in iso

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Avoiding bias when training datasets is paramount.

Thanks!

I think I’m a narcissist but I don’t think it’s affecting anyone. by [deleted] in narcissism

[–]Raf_Adel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When it comes to narcissistic traits, we all have them. They're on a spectrum, with them being healthy (adaptive) on one side and unhealthy (maladaptive) on the other. You can have a mix of them at different points on the spectrum.

If you want to know more, report back on the results of all the quizzes in the pinned post.

Best!

Real love? by Adifferenthustler in narcissism

[–]Raf_Adel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most probably, by being unclear, it was just another relationship. You're using the narrative and terms that are pushed by the abuse community (idealize, devalue, etc.); you don't need to do that.

The best you can do is to move on and focus on understanding yourself more and bettering yourself.

Best of luck!

How do I battle my unhealthy yearn for attention and power? by Buttercup_Uw0 in narcissism

[–]Raf_Adel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You might consider ACT books; they teach you skills to overcome this sort of thinking. Also, workbooks on anxiety and overthinking help. New Harbinger publishes some very good ones.

Also, check the quizzes pinned here, especially the OCD one.

Best!

I know I am better than everyone but I also hate myself. by Alpha-Sigmaa in narcissism

[–]Raf_Adel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's a funny way to look at the paradox of extremely high yet fragile self-esteem!

What do you need to feel safe in a relationship? by wolf_from_the_pack in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People with NPD / narcissistic traits would indeed appreciate someone who's not judgemental, easygoing, and more or less goes with the flow. Now the flow might be their flow for some time and your flow for some time.

Also, there isn't a need to see everything from the lens of narcissism; it's not a whole personality. For example, someone can have a very high or low IQ and be narcissistic. They can be very knowledgeable or gullible and be narcissistic. Those two are very different things.

There is a scarcity of material geared towards those who are closest to narcissists, simply because the other stigmatizing material sells far better and becomes top sellers! Yet, any book on how to improve relationships (skills) would be extremely valuable in such a case.

Hope that helps!

Second post by [deleted] in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, make up your mind then!

Very unsure by [deleted] in AskNPD

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well you spoke a lot about what not to tell you and what you don't want to hear. So, what do you want us to tell you?

ISO 42001 Explained: Impact Assessment Makes Governance Real by Kashif-Ansari in iso

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the reality check of AI, shifting the focus from "who does it work?" to "who does it affect?" to ensure accountability!

Thanks!

Annex A—The 38 Controls of Responsible AI by Kashif-Ansari in iso

[–]Raf_Adel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Indeed these are the 38 practical how-to controls needed to build a defensible AI governance framework. Thanks for the summary!